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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Really annoyed at Someone parking in a Disabled Bay who is definitely not disabled!

315 replies

daisychain01 · 07/10/2014 21:25

I'm normally quite a placid person, who goes about her business and doesn't interfere with other people, but Im absolutely fuming.

Im staying at the Travelodge for two nights, last night was my first night, tonight is my second. When I arrived in the carpark yesterday evening, I was walking towards the entrance with my bags when I was nearly run over in the carpark by a woman in a BMW, texting on her phone while driving, trying to find a space.

It stopped me dead in my tracks! Anyway she then proceeds to drive straight into a disabled bay next to the entrance, obviously there to make it more accessible to a blue badge holder.

She got out of her car and I walked up to her. She was still on her phone, yabbering away, but looked at me. I said very politely, "um excuse me, but do you realise you are parked in a disabled bay .." To which she said as bold as brass "yes I know". So I just thought maybe I will cut her some slack, maybe she will check in then move her car.

I mentioned it to the receptionist and she didnt really want to know, because the parking belongs to the Toby Carvery next door. Out of curiosity I nipped out before going to bed and her car was still there, and still there this morning when I left...

...and there when I have just turned up tonight!

If she had said to me last night "yes thanks for letting me know, Im just unloading my heavy bags but I will move my car shortly" I wouldnt be frothing, but the Toby is really full tonight and whats the betting there is some poor person inside who has had to struggle all the way over from the furthest corner of the carpark because of that selfish cow.

The thing is, should I report her now? I just dont know if Its just me being pissed off at her attitude, and a bit up my own arse...im just feeling vengeful, like I want to teach her a lesson. The Toby is open and full of people.

OP posts:
Roseformeplease · 07/10/2014 22:11

But, my understanding is that you have to display your badge. Am I wrong? Do we assume anyone parking in a disabled bay is disabled now? Because, in my tiny village, the bays are frequently used by people I KNOW to be able bodied (late teens, ex pupils, parents of my pupils etc) and it makes me angry but, not being clear on the law, I never say anything.

combust22 · 07/10/2014 22:12

Only short people are disabled, so the OP is quite right to be annoyed.

ihategeorgeosborne · 07/10/2014 22:12

My mum was disabled and needed a wheel chair most of the time. However, she could walk very short distances before needing to sit down. I remember my dad parking at Somerfield in a disabled space and my mum got out and they walked into the supermarket and someone tutted 'don't look disabled to me'. My dad was stunned, my mum was upset and I was stuck for words for once in my life. You cannot tell just by looking at someone Hmm

thereturnofshoesy · 07/10/2014 22:13

but we don't know yet if the parker had a BB
we are all waiting to hear

CadmiumRed · 07/10/2014 22:17

One of the questions on the assessment form for a BB on our borough is about an ability to walk more than 100m unaided. (I think...can't swear I have the distances right)

Many of the disabilities that would impair someone's ability to walk 100m unaided are indeed invisible, but if an adult is moving fast and unaided over distances greater than 100m, and carrying heavy bags to boot, and doesn't have a BB, you would be on a safe bet to go into tirade mode, I reckon.

Ludways · 07/10/2014 22:20

A blue badge doesn't need to be displayed in private parking.

Ludways · 07/10/2014 22:22

Like I say, my mum has a blue badge, she can walk for miles and hikes in the summer months. Her disability is not mobility related. She still needs the blue badge, as agreed by her doctor who recommended her and the woman who granted her the badge.

thereturnofshoesy · 07/10/2014 22:23

OP we need to know if there was a BB

WorraLiberty · 07/10/2014 22:34

She's quite talented to be able to text with her ears Grin

Original poster
daisychain01 · 07/10/2014 22:34

Yes I could have used different words and I apologise for my clumsy description, all I have is this iPad keyboard, a rectangular box and words to try and describe. I was just trying to describe how she got out of the car, without any trouble, probably quicker than me with my sciatica! Maybe go back to my OP and remember I was annoyed because I felt the woman was arrogant and pretty damn rude, so it did get my back up. Which is why I asked AIBU. If she was entitled to park there, all she needed to say was thank you I know and I have a BB.

I think it is OK for the public to ask someone the question politely. Its good intent isnt it?

Anyway I went outside, there is no BB on her car, the two cars next to hers have clearly visible badges.

I went into the Toby and a very helpful person said they would come out and check. He was satisfied there was no BB and he said it happens all the time, plus vans park in front of the bays which also block the access for disabled drivers.

He has taken photos of the car and said if it is still there in the morning, then he will report it. Apparently he said they have a clamping policy, which I think is reasonable. It isnt like the bay isnt clearly marked.

I just cant believe the cheek of the woman and that she thinks its OK to do it twice!

OP posts:
thereturnofshoesy · 07/10/2014 22:36

well done for reporting her.
sadly she will no doubt do it again.
I wish people who did that could have their cars confiscated.

thereturnofshoesy · 07/10/2014 22:37

have to say, no you shouldn't question people who park in BB bays

WorraLiberty · 07/10/2014 22:39

OP my dad has a blue badge due to his heart condition.

He's so fed up with people assuming he's taking the piss, that I can assure you he would (and has on many occasions) replied with "I know".

combust22 · 07/10/2014 22:39

Clamping is banned on private land. The hotel cannot clamp. Disabled badges and spaces are also meaningless on private land.

WorraLiberty · 07/10/2014 22:40

And despite his age, he can get out of his car quicker than a ninja if he wants to.

thereturnofshoesy · 07/10/2014 22:41

combust22 bad isn't it. I always wonder why not.

Wishfulmakeupping · 07/10/2014 22:42

You have no right to question people actually OP if there's no bb then report to the pub/shop in first instance.
I don't 'look' disabled. I didn't use my bb for a while after being given one the first time I did I got questioned by an elderly woman and her daughter had to show the them my bb in the end- and they still reported me to the shop really set me back. Anyway please if people aren't sure can they just go to the shop itself if there's no bb as it can be quite upsetting for people.

Original poster
daisychain01 · 07/10/2014 22:44

Also he did come back in with me to the Travelodge reception and mentioned to the person on the desk that one of their guests was parked in a Disabled bay with no Badge displayed. So he was quite fair more than she deserved

ludways do you know if parking at places like restaurants etc are classed as Private? The parking at this Toby place is also used by the Travelodge, so not sure what that means. Anyway he said they do report people who flout the regs on the 3 disabled bays, so Toby is definitely Tops as far as Im concerned. And he was very concerned and helpful, unlike the rather apathetic Travel-dodgy staff who was quite CBA.

OP posts:
ElephantsNeverForgive · 07/10/2014 22:44

Yes it is possible she had a hidden disability and had misplaced her badge, however, given the sort of fancy Blue badge free cars that use the disabled bays at motorway services I doubt it.

Silverdaisy · 07/10/2014 22:51

Who was it reported to though? Private parking usually employ agencies that they have commissioned.

Original poster
daisychain01 · 07/10/2014 22:51

all I said was "did you realise that is a disabled bay?" so hardly confrontational or upsetting. Sort of hedging my bets.

It's the first time I have ever done it, but I think if people feel scared to even mention it, then that's not a good thing. But anyway this is all just my opinion. I was probably more concerned about her using her phone while driving. Yes, texting with her elbow Grin

And I'm turning into Victor Meldrew! Probably due to having to stay at the Travelodge and coming out to find to tomato ketchup and mustard slathered all over my windscreen.

OP posts:
AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore · 07/10/2014 22:55

all I said was "did you realise that is a disabled bay?" so hardly confrontational or upsetting

And she answered you. She said "I know."

Why would you think that she should have to clarify to you that she is disabled? why should she have to explain ANYTHING to you? You're not entitled to her private medical information.

If you think someone is taking the piss in parking there, just report it and move on. But don't harass them, so many have invisible disabilities.

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore · 07/10/2014 22:57

It's the first time I have ever done it, but I think if people feel scared to even mention it, then that's not a good thing.

Then perhaps it should be the last time you do it. Not sure why you think you have a right to question someone about their right to park there when you hadn't even looked to see if they had a blue badge.

Anniegetyourgun · 07/10/2014 22:58

Ooh goody, we haven't had a disabled parking thread in, like, days

Original poster
daisychain01 · 07/10/2014 22:58

Not sure who the Toby man will report it to. I just left him to it. He said they have had to do it before. I hadnt thought about the difference between public/private parking.

All I know, since the day I started driving, is never park in one of those bays even if you have to walk half a mile away, its slashing down with rain, or you have 5 bags to carry, no excuse.

If I had a BB I wouldnt risk not displaying it, I would just leave it visible all the time, then there isnt a problem (like those other two cars). But I am very lucky and dont need a BB, which is why I started this thread.

OP posts:
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