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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

aibu to think maybe I am losing my mind, need some advice please

174 replies

fragileyourock · 24/09/2014 20:50

Bear with me please as I think maybe I, m over reacting I dont know. In my bathroom upstairs I have white vinyl tiles on the floor and I am pretty anal about keeping them clean and the toilet. Once a day normally mid morning I clean and bleach the toilet then I wipe the floor with disinfectant wipes. Its just me and my son who is eleven.
In the last two days something weird has been happening in the bathroom please dont laugh as its scarying me. We always and visitors take shoes off downstairs never go upstairs in shoes. But for some reason there have been footprints and hairs on the bathroom floor, tiny curly black hairs. Its not from my son as he is not hairy and its not from me because I use hair remover and did this two weeks ago.
I get a gut feeling that somebody is doing this or maybe my mind is losing the plot. But I, m racking my brains as to a reasonable explaination. I know I must sound deranged but something is not right

OP posts:
frankie001 · 24/09/2014 23:27

I agree, call police. Baby oil or flour seems a good idea in meantime.

londonrach · 24/09/2014 23:29

Please op call the police. I dont want to frighten you but is there somewhere you could stay tonight. The police wont think you losing your mind. I think you need some protection. The man under the car has me worried.

BitOutOfPractice · 24/09/2014 23:30

Fragile I think that whoever is doing this is doing it in a way that's to make you feel like you're going mad. So, if you do feel like that it's not surprising. It's absolutely understandable. So don't beat yourself up about that.

Please phone the police. This person is the unhinged one here, not you!!

Karsyn · 24/09/2014 23:36

if this were me I'd book a hotel for a few days call the police and have them completely search then watch my house, no way I'd be staying there

Katarzyna79 · 24/09/2014 23:40

Get some gloves collect the hair. I know sounds ott but I would get my kid and stay with family or friends. Police will do jack all until something happens to you. If you say this person is violent take action todsy.

I know someone whose case was on the bbc news rescently Her husband was violent, she was making arrangements to leave him. He was restricted via courts from visiting her or kids. She never thought he would go this far but basically he strangled her to death in front of the kids.
Everyone is in shock no one thought he could murder her. But why not everyone knew he was violent why not capable of murder?

put your safety first, better to be ott and safe.

Slutbucket · 24/09/2014 23:44

Do not do anything further do not collect hair this is a crime scene. Somebody has entered your house you need to call the police and they need to do forensics. Keep to the facts, don't act or mention crazy let the police do their job.

slothage · 24/09/2014 23:52

I agree, get the hairs in a bag as evidence and inform the police.

7Days · 24/09/2014 23:53

I can understand the Don't be silly feeling. But look. Who'll know, only yourself (who won't say anything if you are just overreacting, which I hope you are) or the police (who are not allowed say anything, regardless)

So never mind that feeling, and ring them and ask their advice. They are experts in this, you are not, we are not. Let them help.

Morloth · 24/09/2014 23:55

Fuck 'Don't be silly', better silly than attacked/dead.

Come on, do something, change the locks at the very least and contact the police.

7Days · 25/09/2014 00:02

Let's not frighten her unduly, something is unlikely to happen this very night seeing as how it has being going on so long already. But it is night and we all know how the imagination works. Smile

but the point stands, Fragile give them a ring, and get it logged at least. Ask them for advice about securing doors and windows. Tomorrow you can go to B&Q and get the bits. Have you someone to help you with that if you are not confident with DIY stuff?

IneedAwittierNickname · 25/09/2014 00:10

This thread had given me the heeby jeebies. It's not often I wish I wasn't single :(

Random1999 · 25/09/2014 00:16

Maybe get additional locks, get locks changed and only have a key for yourself if possible, even if you have to make arrangements for your son to go to a friends or neighbours after school until you can collect him (if you work FT) as your son could lose his key or have it stolen from his bag if he isn't careful enough, You can keep tabs if you only have the one key. Also dial 101 tomorrow morning and get it logged with police, Or take a trip to the police station. I'd recommend going to work or wherever as normal then changing into a different top in the bathroom/putting a hoodie on in your car, getting your hood up and hair up/down(the opposite of the way it was) then getting a bus to police station in case you are being stalked.
Hope all is ok. dont mean to worry you but id rather be over cautious.xx

Morloth · 25/09/2014 00:18

It is not the middle of the night here.

If the OP thinks someone is entering her house, she should do something about it.

Rainbunny · 25/09/2014 00:19

Don't assume you're imagining things. My family moved to a new village when I was a child. My mum kept noticing things being moved in the house, but with a husband and two kids she didn't think too much of it. It kept happening though and one day our neighbour stopped by for a chat and mentioned to my mum that she didn't know we had family staying. My mum asked her what she meant and the neighbour explained that she had seen our grandmother looking out an upstairs window. That freaked my mum out of course, and she explained that we didn't have family staying and that things had been moved around on occasion for a while now. Our neighbour, who was at home in the day agreed to keep an eye out. A week later we had our answer. An old lady several houses away was getting into our house during the day and looking around and goodness knows what else? The neighbour saw her and followed her home. We never knew how she got a key to our house, we didn't confront her (she had a degree of dementia which was obvious and an alcoholic, aggressive adult son who lived with her) but we had our locks changed immediately. Just saying, these things really do happen. If I was you I would absolutely get your locks changed and put in locks on any window that might be a possible method of entry.

jezzapaxmanslovechild · 25/09/2014 00:19

Sorry if this has been mentioned already - but do you have a loft?

Tiredmumno1 · 25/09/2014 00:30

That's what I was going to say jezza. Obviously not trying to scare you more OP, but you need to be cautious and look at every possibility.

Hope you are doing ok? Thanks

ScrambledeggLDCcakeBOAK · 25/09/2014 01:11

jezz

I was just going to ask that.

Some rows of houses have lofts that are connected so you can get from one to another to another.

Bulbasaur · 25/09/2014 04:31

Read the updates.

Don't do a stake out, that could be dangerous. Can you get CCTV installed outside your house? Or a nanny cam inside while you're gone?

Definitely call the police. If it is him, he's doing this deliberately to scare you. At least file a report so that if something -god forbid- happens then you at least have it on file that this it wasn't out of the blue.

AnotherStitchInTime · 25/09/2014 08:54

Ok read the updates. Take photos as evidence and keep the wipes with the hair on as someone else suggested. Or leave it as you found it and call them. Tell them you think you have had an intruder.

Original poster
fragileyourock · 25/09/2014 09:37

I do have a loft but rarely go up there. The houses are terraced so they are all in a row. I have cleaned the bathroom spotless, hoovered the tiles clean this morning after both my son and I have showered. I am in allday today.
When the incedent with the male under my car the police came with dogs and searched the area as the male calmly stood and stared at the person that disturbed them and then he calmly walked away and jumped over a fence and went off. The police put it down as a suspicious incident even though they could clearly see how distressed I was at the time. So part of me is reluctant to call them if you see what I mean. I did say to them at the time who I thought it could of been.

OP posts:
NumanoidNancy · 25/09/2014 09:39

If you've already had the locks changed recently and this weird stuff is still happening then whoever it is is either being let in, coming in when you are already in or coming in to the house another way. Check window locks (or put some on if you haven't got any) and check the loft. My house is a semi detached and the two lofts are linked. (Luckily I trust my neighbour completely!)

It is scary but you need to think logically about it and then take action.

19lottie82 · 25/09/2014 09:43

when you close your front door, jam in a tiny bit of paper at the bottom, that you can see (just) sticking out, right at the bottom of the door.

if you get home and it's not there (fallen out when the door has been opened), you know someone has been in.

Aridane · 25/09/2014 09:50

Yes, check the loft, check the window locks. Check also whether your neighbour has seen anything. Then the police. Even if the police don't / can't do anything, they can come round and check the security of your home

ChippingInLatteLover · 25/09/2014 09:50

Reluctant to call them

Don't be silly. I would have them fucking camping out until it was sorted! He could be in the loft, he could be hiding under the beds. Jesus wept, next time you come home to pubes & footprints call the police.

Random1999 · 25/09/2014 09:51

Lotties suggestion is great you can do the same with the windows too, Make sure all are shut when you go out,

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