So DS brought home a massive TURD in his book bag!

[PixieHollowDweller]

He started Reception on Tuesday. He's 4.1 years. Can't remember his last poo accident like this since he was potty trained at just 3.

He was given clean pants but obviously no help to clean up as those were massively stained as well and he stank, bless him.

His pants were in a plastic bag with a full sized poo in them that had been there since lunchtime.

AIBU to think this was unhygienic and they could have at least tipped it into the loo or got him to. If they'D contacted me I could have been there in 5 minutes. Bit pissed off tbh.

Visit the other local schools and get him on the waiting list for at least 2 if you can. If this is what they're like in the first week, it isn't goibg to get better. There'll be a reason why the other schools have waiting lists and this one had free places. Don't hang on hoping it'll get better. You can always turn down a place in the other schools if one is offered and you've changed your mind.

It is awful op, a child should not be left to smell and in that condition that is bottom is so sore he is hurting. Did you manage to get an appointment to see the HT. I would seriously look at other schools, or put on their waiting list. If they are like this in the first week, I dread to think how they are going to be like in subsequent weeks. Really not letting you look around their school and meet their staff before is a big red flag.

At my DCs' school we were asked in advance how we wanted accidents dealt with - we had to sign a form saying we either did or did not give our permission for staff to deal with it including cleaning them up - if not then you have to sign to accept that school will ring you in the event of soilingx

School loos usually start off clean every morning. When they get manky it's the kids that make them so. And they stay that way until the cleaners come in again that night. It must be a thankless task for them.

FuzzPig - That's a really sensible approach. I imagine most reception children will have a wet accident at some point with many having soiling accidents too. Best to just agree an approach in advance. Also if the parent says call me s/he should be able to say actually I can't get there quickly at the moment please could you deal with it. If you're in Sainbury's you don't want you DC in soiled pants for an hour while you get there but if you're at home and can be there in 10 mins it might be nicer for the child to be changed by mum.

This really annoys me.
There is no "law" that says you can't clean up children: otherwise how would care workers / nurses etc. cope? That's simply made up by schools.
there is also no "law" to say they can't double bag clothes after rinsing them out. people really do come out with bollox

I hope you get some feedback from the school OP.

From the NUT link upthread "no child should be left in wet or soiled clothing". The school's treatment of your child was undignified, unnecessary and unkind. I agree with all pp that YANBU to complain to the head, ask to see their policy, and ask what exactly happened on this occasion - did he have any help, for example. I would also insist on a look around the school, consider escalating the complaint to the LEA/Ofsted, and get him on the waiting list for other schools.

If you aren't granted a walk around or the response you get to this complaint is unsatisfactory, consider unregistering him. This is not a good start to his school life, a very poor shown indeed.

What happened, OP? Did you get a reply to your note?

That's definitely not acceptable, hope the teacher replied to your note with a satisfactory response. I am an Reception teacher btw I have cleaned children up numerous times in the same way that I would have expected someone to do the same thing for my DD in her school if necessary. I usually throw out the underwear though and have never had any parent complain.

There is no rule that teachers cannot change/clean children there is just guidance on how to do it safely (for you and the child) and individuals school policy. I usually phone home afterwards so the parents are aware and then can choose to collect early if they wish esp if the child has badly soiled and really should be given a bath as there is only so much you can do with a wet wipe!!

I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes for your little boy, Pixie. My son's reception teacher and TAs would never have dreamed of leaving a child in that state. I would also be massively concerned at the rule about waiting outside the gates. I hope you've received a response to your note but I would be asking for a copy of the school's policy and potentially escalating it to the Governors.

Is your little lad OK today?

There is a little boy in dd's class who wears a nappy still. They deal with it no problem. Just reinforcing that the idea of not being allowed to touch a child is incorrect.

That is horrible OP and I can see why you are upset.

But on the other hand I can see how it has happened. The teacher/ TA would have told him to take his pants off and put on the clean ones. Then they (or DS) would have quickly scooped the dirty pants up in a plastic bag, they probably didn't even see the poo. I very much doubt they would want a turd stinking out the classroom all daisy either!

Maybe put some wet wipes in his bag until he gets a bit better at wiping? You can also tell the school to call you next time he has an accident.