So DS brought home a massive TURD in his book bag!

[PixieHollowDweller]

He started Reception on Tuesday. He's 4.1 years. Can't remember his last poo accident like this since he was potty trained at just 3.

He was given clean pants but obviously no help to clean up as those were massively stained as well and he stank, bless him.

His pants were in a plastic bag with a full sized poo in them that had been there since lunchtime.

AIBU to think this was unhygienic and they could have at least tipped it into the loo or got him to. If they'D contacted me I could have been there in 5 minutes. Bit pissed off tbh.

I remember when DD had an accident the reception teacher apologised to me for cleaning her up: "I hope you don't mind but I couldn't leave her like that, poor love."

It's a sad state of affairs when people are afraid to perform simple human kindnesses or think they have to apologise for them.

It's a school policy. I have queried this as me and my TA would be willing to support if needed but both the other Early Years teachers flat out refused and so the head made this policy.
(When a child in my class had continence issues we were allowed to get written permission from his parents to support him with wiping and clean him up etc) but as a general rule they won't let us go near them!

I can't help thinking that if they insist on the children starting so young, they need to be prepared for eventualities like these.

Indeed, Holiday

Exactly it's ridiculous to expect a very young to be able to cope with a poo accident on their own, heck even some adults cannot. This should be in TA job description when working with primary school chikdren.

YANBU, I'd be horrified.

I imagine you've flushed it already (like anyone normal would've done), but it's a pity because if it was me, I'd be taking it back to school - to the HT. And if the HT finds it unacceptable to presented with it in her office, then why is OK to put it in your son's bag? I would definitely be going to the HT, by the way, in any event.

It's hard though, my son's school have done stuff along these lines, but not as bad, but he was OK (and older) and I didn't complain.

unfortunately we are not allowed to help clean the children up (only offer verbal instructions)
"Not allowed" by whom exactly? The school and teachers have both a common-law duty of care as well as statutory duty of care. They may "do what is reasonable in all the circumstances of the case for the purpose of safeguarding or promoting the child’s welfare." (Children's Act 1989, Section 3(5)) It does not say anywhere "except if it means helping them with going to the toilet or cleaning them or touching their bottom" Funnily enough.

That's disgusting glast. Chikdrens welfare should be put first, it would be unacceptable to do this to an adult, same applies to a child. If they cannot, child's parents or carers should be contacted straight away.

Why would they send it home? Evidence? I used to get hacked off when nursery sent home half eaten sandwiches.

That's really unfortunate for you Glasto, at least you are willing to help.

The other two teachers really have no business teaching such young children if they are so precious about the reality of it.

I posted just above you MSAnyhropic - it's part of the school's child protection (although I don't hold our cp officer in high esteem better not go into details but have posted about her before under a different name!)

MsAnthropic (sorry auto correct)

"A full-sized poo".

Is there a standard scale for these things?

That is really not ok. How humiliating the poor little thing.

I would request an explanation from the school. If they were adamant they wouldn't help him they should have phoned you to come and sort him out.

I would be worried at such misguided ill treatment of a child. If it was fine to teach him a lesson I would complain. It's cruel to leave a child in soiled clothes and to place a turd in his bag.

If it was done to 'teach him a lesson' I would complain.

Gosh thank you for all the relies. DS is fine although he did say he was crying for me . Bottom has had a good soak and Sudocrem applied.

I found out from a note in his 'home book' as we are not allowed on school grounds at all,have to stand outside the gates and the DC are allowed to come out when they and the teacher see us, so she could'nt tell me to my face. It was then that that I pulled out the offending pants . It was not his teacher who wrote in his homebook, may have been a dinner lady.

Can't believe nobody noticed he smelled through the afternoon though .

I actually thought I would get heckled about sending my child to school without being able to use the toilet effectively so I am pleasantly surprised! He is normally very clean but he was very tired this morning and cried when I dropped him off which I felt like crap all day about.

I will go into the office tomorrow and ask to speak to someone about it officially. I was going to put a note about it in his book but I think it needs to go higher than that.

Thank you and Chronically and all those like her - bless you .

I agree OP. It's really poor of them. Child protection indeed!

Yes unacceptable, take pictures of the state of his bottom and go straight to the head teacher. The teacher or TA should have told you instead of you discovering them. How do they think it's acceptable to do that!

Ah bless him.

Why on earth didn't they just bin them!!

By 'full sized poo' I meant not just a little marble that may not have been noticed but a standard Mars bar sized.

I am wondering it it was to prove a point. This is a school that refused my request to look around it when we moved here earlier this year and I needed to apply for a place after the primary admissions cut off. They were too busy apparently. Unfortunately all other schools had long waiting lists.

They also deliberately set their phone line through to their fax line all last week so they did not to deal with phone calls from parents.

My daughters nursery sent home a full size poo, smooshed all over the inside of the jogging bottoms that the knickers where still inside of.

They were not my daughters clothes.

They sent home someone elses full size turd.

I think it depends on what exactly happened, my three year old would not like anyone helping him with wiping. I could see this happening in a situation where the child wanted to sort it out themselves and was passed bag to put his own pants in, I don't think I'd have necessarily gone looking in the bag if I was the teacher. If your DC was asking for help from them though then I think they should have done more. With regards to ringing you, it sounds like that would have been the best solution in your situation but I'd be pissed off if I got a call like that at work.

This school sounds worrying, I would be onto Ofstead if I were you and the LEA. I have never heard of parents not being able to see the teacher. Refusing you to look round tge school, what are they hiding!