I've come a bit late to this, and I have not read the whole thread.
It's notable that posts which state the uncontroversially obvious - that how you feed your baby has an impact on you and your baby, and that there are different outcomes for bf and ff babies - are described as coming over as judgmental and militant. The impact is minimised by some of these posters, with the usual non-scientific and puzzlingly naive observation that you can't tell by looking at a bunch of five-year-olds/a bunch of adults which were bf/ff (of course you can't! You can't tell a lot of things by looking at people - sheesh) and therefore it doesn't matter....as if the only thing that would matter would be ff making people cross-eyed, or green-skinned, or something else solely visible to a casual glance.
Bf has a positive impact on health - generally speaking, when breastfeeding is going well, both mothers and babies gain by it, physiologically and nutritionally. In individual cases, these benefits are either absent (because bf is not going well) or are off-set by other (to her, equally valid) aspects of the mother's or the baby's well-being. But in any case, if someone simply does not want to bf at all, then of course she is an autonomous adult and able to make that choice - it would be as absurd to say every woman must breastfeed if she is capable of it, as to say every woman must conceive and give birth if she is capable of it.
Equally, though, as an autonomous adult, it would be nice (though not legally enforceable!) if she could own her decision/choice not to bf without denigrating discussion points or ignoring factual info, or assuming breastfeeding info and support and research is designed to judge her as a mother.
Basically, breastfeeding is (potentially) a lovely thing to do for your baby which, mostly, mothers and babies enjoy....when it's going well. The majority of women want to try this potentially lovely thing, and should be supported in doing so, wherever they want to do it and for the length of time they want to do it. Those who wanted to do it, and found it all went wrong, and feel very sad about it, should not be told they are making a fuss about nothing because it makes no difference (you wouldn't say that to someone struggling with fertility issues, would you?). It makes a difference to her because it felt important to her and part of how she saw herself as a mother.
All women who ff, including the ones who don't feel sad, or who did not want to bf anyway, or who ff from the start or near the start, and are fine about it, of course are entitled to as much support and info as they need to do it rewardingly, safely, and confidently. What I think is asking too much is that all discussion (about culture, nutrition, illness, marketing and whatever else connects with the topic of infant feeding ) ceases because it is judgmental to those who don't bf. There are some unpleasantly aggressive and defensive posts on this thread, for no good reason as far as I can tell.