To hope that I can ask about FF without being shot down in flames?

[Darksideofthemoon88]

I'm interested in WHY people choose to FF if not for medical reasons (ie they can't because of medication they have to take, or because their baby was very premature and is unable to suckle) - I've seen a lot of threads where people assert that FF was best for them/their family/their baby or that they chose to FF without trying BF, and I'm curious as to why. Genuinely curious I'm not interested in fighting with anyone about what's best or right; I'd just like to read about why people FF because I honestly don't know. In the interests of full disclosure though (I know how MNs feel about this! ), I am a breastfeeding mother.

Oh gosh yes the public announcements. Ds frequently tells everyone at the park that "daddy hadda wee wee".

He's currently obsessed with wee and poo and counting to 10. (He's 2 and 2 months).

I don't know if that says good things about formula feeding or not but it's very amusing

And the user who said breastfeeding has a 'weird sexiness' about it, what the hell?? Breastfeeding is not a remotely sexual act. These type of opinions are a sad consequence of the over sexualisation of breasts in our society

silver827 well bully for you that you got through your difficulties, but don't you dare assume for a moment that I do not put my daughter first just because I stopped breast feeding her.

Silver, let me tell you a secret: Some women don't actually believe all the hype; they know that their baby will grow up as healthy as the next one whether he is bf or ff. We all know of ff children who grew up to be highly intelligent, kind and successful adults. Some of us don't want the pain and suffering (not to mention the misery) that bf-ing can bring.

Do you put your child first in every single way then silver?

But the thread isn't about that, Silver. It's about why women choose to FF.

I do put my children first silver and part of that is making sure that I am fit to take care of them, both mentally and physically. With DS1 and DD who were FF, if I'd forced myself to BF even if I didn't like it then I'd have been miserable which in turn would have made DH miserable and DS/DD miserable. What a shitty family life that would be.

Let me guess "my boy" is your PFB? So staying in PJs, not getting anything done, being pinned to the sofa isn't so much of an issue. Try doing all of those things when you also have a toddler to take care of as well as a newborn to feed. BFing the baby is ten times harder when you have PFB eating Prit-stik and climbing the dining room curtains while you're busy feeding.

"I find it unfortunate when people say they didnt breastfeed because they just 'didnt like it', once you have a child you should put them first"

Oh have a word with yourself! FF mothers are generally quite capable of evaluating the pros and cons of FF v BF. If we decide that the benefits of BF are extremely small, so much so that in fact we might dare use the word negligible, we should be able to do it without some patronising individual telling us to put our child first.

This is not a choice between feeding milk or cola fgs, it's the difference between one form of milk which sustains and benefits against another type of milk which sustains and benefits.

I think it's about to kick off, Mrs D - you got here just in time :o

Fairylea, I have a 2yo who does public announcements too. "Mammy did a wee out of her foofy!" There are days I regret teaching that one to talk.

I don't always "put my children first" (suffer for them) to be honest. I put the TV on so I can get stuff done, leave them with a babysitter, use nursery even though I didn't have to, I don't eat cheap food so I can afford to give them organic, I had a glass of wine while pregnant, I brought the baby into bed with me even though the rules say not to...

I just think its a shame how some give up too easily. Im not talking about those who have a truly awful time with bf.
I very much intend to bf all subsequent children, although of course I cant say for sure.
And it isnt just 'hype' about the benefits.of bfing, much of it is medical fact.

Silver its great that you've just put yourself through all that pain, discomfort and misery.

.

Sometimes I lie and tell the children it's 7.30 and bedtime when really it's only 7pm or even 6.45 that's because some days, much as I love them, I need a bit extra time for myself. Some days it easier to be a parent than others.

I used chocolate buttons as potty training bribes.

Oh silver... is it lonely up there on your pedestal?

Its done well then Bear to get this far innit

Shame though. I am genuinely interested and not in a 'not really interested, just want a platform to go on about bfing' sort of way.

I FF one of my DC because I had to. He was adopted. I found it a fair old faff. HATED it. Not because of the lack of bonding or it being not the best or anything. We bonded, he thrived.

It was all the bloody washing up.

Silver - good for you. BUT THIS THREAD ISNT ABOUT THAT. It's about why women choose to FF, not why you don't agree with it.

I thought chocolate buttons only existed to be used as bribes

Hoobypicky but the benefits of breastfeeding are NOT 'very small' or 'negligible' To suggest so is ignorant.

Silver!!

Haha hollie, I just stocked up on buttons. I'm in potty training he'll with DD. She's 3yo in three weeks and even though she can use the potty and is perfectly capable of using the potty, she chooses not to because she doesn't like it.

Oh! Irony!

Ha, I did choccy button bribes and occasional 'early' bedtimes too. :-)

silver to suggest that formula feeding your baby isn't 'putting them first' is ignorant, didn't stop you saying it.

Yep DD is 2 as well. Very interested in the concepts of wee and poo.

Silver, whatever. It worked out for you. It doesn't for everyone and many make a perfectly reasonable choice not to try for a myriad of different reasons that I doubt you care to understand.

Oh I do that too bear.

On new years eve a few years back I was super mean and while dd was busy watching tv thinking she gets to stay up till midnight i went round and changed all the clocks from 9.30pm to nearly midnight... she was about 8 at the time. "Oh look! Hasn't the time flown! It's nearly new years day!"....

I balanced the needs of my 8 year old to stay up late with my need for personal space and sleep.... Win win.

Parenting is all about balance and assessing risks and benefits. It never stops.