To refuse to un-recline dd's plane seat...

[MerryMarigold]

Dh reckons I am. I reckon I am not.

So, long haul flight. Up at 3am to get to airport. 2 flights, 4 hour transit, bit of a hideous trip.

Anyways, on second flight, dd aged 5 FINALLY falls asleep. Thank God. Recline her seat so she is more comfortable and will hopefully sleep longer. 5 minutes later lady behind pokes my arm and asks me to put the chair up. Not very politely. I tell her my dd is asleep. She says she can't open her table with the chair reclined. (I have done this many times, so know it is entirely possible). I kneel on my chair and help her open table. Says she can't see TV screen. I adjust TV screen angle for her. She then proceeds to kick Dd's chair several times, whilst I get annoyed but decide to ignore.

10 mins later drinks come round and she speaks to the air steward in local language. He says to me. "Can I raise the seat?" and I tell him dd is sleeping. He says, "I'll do it gently" and just leans over me and does it. Thankfully she didn't wake up and managed to sleep in a contorted way for a lot longer.

I am usually the sort of person who doesn't stick up for myself and who doesn't like putting other people out (I didn't recline my own chair for the entire 9 hour flight as her large dh was behind me). I was very tired, I think that's why I was a bit arsey. I am also not being PFB. I have 3 children, but the others were not as tired and were fine.

Dh said it was her 'right' to have the seat up at least until the food is cleared up (this is probably at least 3 hours into the flight as it's a long flight). I said, "Says who?" Does her right to eat more comfortably trump my dd's right to sleep more comfortably?

So who is right?

Littlewhitebag - totally not relevant to the thread, but Penzance to Glasgow, no changes 06.28 departure, arrive Glasgow 18.11 - 11 hours 43 minutes.

I go case by case on this. We do 11hr night flights. You've just got to try make allowances for each other. That said, I was gobsmacked on our last flight, when the person in front of me reclined for the whole flight and then really bitched at me to make my child stop kicking her! Ffs he was a hefty 8 monther who had slept for the whole flight - any kicking was me trying to hlto keep my circulation going...

Lurker - I fly BA between Australia and the UK and have never been forcibly "unreclined", even in meal service. The only things they've woken me up for is when I've had a child under 2 and the seatbelt sign has come on, so I've needed to remove him from the table seat and belt him to me. (Oh, and the last time between Sydney and Singapore, where DS2 decided to have an allergic reaction to something and needed medical checks every hour! He was fine)

Irian...you must have missed the post upthread where it is being pointed out to us tallies that we don't need to recline as our heads can loll over the headrest.....it's apparently only short people and 5 yr olds who are already asleep who need the facility.

Heard it all now.......

But why if the child was already sleeping? That's pointless. Reclining it just because you can despite it making no difference... entitled.

Maybe to ensure she stayed asleep and didn't jolt awake as her head fell forward?

I bet the woman would have complained had she had an overtired 5 year old sitting in front of her.

I do find it funny that people are saying "but she stayed asleep - what is the problem?" I imagine that the problem is that there was no guarantee she would stay asleep and having the seat reclined was the best way to maximise the chances of her doing so.

Saying "X didn't happen so what was wrong with doing Y" is such a stupid argument.

Youwiththeface- if your kid (or) you had been kicking me I'd have given you a mouthful as well, and I'm an anti recliner....

Virgin Atlantic almost always ask people to sit their chairs up whilst food and drink is served. It's only polite surely?

I hate the chair in Front reclined as it does make you feel more claustrophobic and hemmed in. But accept that people do especially on a night flight - but I do expect to be able to eat my meal without the nightmare of a chair back in my face!

It's rude not to raise the chair for meal times - very much so.

Trouble is chair reclining is like a domino affect. Once one person does it then most of the people behind them then have to to give themselves more room.

It's incredibly rude to recline during meal times. It is disruptive to other passengers.

Youwiththeface said the 8 month old baby slept the whole time. If somebody had an eight month old on their lap, I probably wouldn't recline (unless they were also reclined and I had said to tell me if baby was too near seat back).

Trouble is chair reclining is like a domino affect. Once one person does it then most of the people behind them then have to to give themselves more room.

Yes - and there is always some poor person at the back who can't recline and gets squished.

I would also vote for no reclining seats in economy - for all flights. There's just not enough room for people to do so.

Then if people want to recline they should pay more and go premium.

What Thumbwitch said at 13:13

I'm old enough to remember when the seat pitch in economy was decent and flying was actually pleasant. It is no longer fun at all, but it could get worse:

www.cnn.com/2014/07/17/travel/airbus-saddle-seat-patent/

You've paid for the seat. The seat reclines, ergo if you want to recline it, go ahead and recline it!

Life's a bitch. Live with it.

If people are having food and drink it is normally considered the done thing to recline the seat. Otherwise it's difficult to eat or drink. YABU.

That should be not recline seat. Hmm.

Yanbu if I had been sitting behind your dd I wouldn't have said anything she is a child as someone else with a young dd I would want her to be reclined as well.

Wow hasn't this thread grown - must be the holiday season! Anyway I'd still like to know what the person sat next to dd by the window was doing during all this and had they reclined their seat?

I don't know why we are even debating it since the OP herself says the DD continued to sleep well even with the seat up. So win-win !

I think maybe a compromise could have been met, but kicking a child's chair is disgraceful if someone did that to my child they wouldn't be living.

Normal kids seem able to sleep upright op!

Normal kids seem able to sleep upright op!

No, some kids are.

I do love that sudden clunk, then man in row in front has his head in your lap - nice to meet you too!
OP afraid I do think YABU and especially because your dd was happily asleep and then you decided to recline the seat. Tbh if it were me behind you I probably wouldn't have made a fuss as I'd much rather a child was sleeping on a plane than anything else!

Yabu. Seat did not need to be recl

Seat did not need to be reclined for child to sleep. Fed up with entitled people on flights who don't consider the needs of others. Looking forward to non-recl