To be incensed by nonsense phrases

[watchingthedetectives]

"Eat beautiful"

"Eat colourful"

"Fly smart"

What do all these crap slogans mean. They actively put me off eating at Itsu, Pret and flying Aegean if I could actually "fly smart" it would most certainly be with another airline

There seem to be more and more of these phrases emerging daily. Some advertising genius is making a fortune with these random half baked statements.

Boring old garden-variety shamoo/conditioner/hairspray/mousse is called Product

Do you want product on that?

No! just spray it with hairspray already!

And calling it Product seems to mysteriously make it cost and arm and a leg

Surely pan fried is as opposed to deep fat frier. So specifically useful when talking about fried fish.

I think pan fried is supposed to make us think it's healthier. But there could be an inch of fat in the pan.

Exactly piggle - I found it a bit strange filling in the comments cards after a short stay in the local hospital's Acute Unit: "Would you recommend staying in this ward to friends and family?"

Er... personally I'd hope none of them had cause to stay there in the first place, but maybe that's just me.

I hate the way food companies try to make us think our food and drink is a person.

So:
"Keep me in the fridge"
"Eat me by"
"Don't freeze me"

Just fuck right off with your infantilising! I understand about food hygiene - I've been buying and preparing food for 30 years!

On trend! Or even worse, Bang on trend! Makes me want to bang them in the face with a shovel..... Oooo that's better.

Oh yes on trend!

And the outfit is usually bloody ridiculous

Bag lady. .

Paint your nails this colour and you'll be on on trend.... These shoes are on trend and don't even get me started about "what's trending on Twitter!

Oh just thought of another one.

'Well jell'.

Grr.

calonwyn has beaten me to it - I've just logged into Rightmove and rushed immediately to this thread to share my outrage!

So tempted to get a t-shirt printed:

Go Fun Yourself. BOOM!

And wear it with a Mumsnet scarf

A pp has already mentioned "a shoe/trouser/jean" when it should be a pair of shoes/trousers/jeans. Really bugs me for some reason.

Unless wearing one shoe is Bang On Trend these days.

echt "Eastern Promise" used to be part of the slogan for Fry's Turkish Deligh back in the 60s and 70s: "Full of eastern promise". What is it associated with now? You can youtube the 60s ads.

Its used for anything from airline adverts to magazine editorials (fashion/cookery/home sections) - it's cheesy, lazy copywriting.

fluffyraggies ^I said this on another thread recently - My MIL has taken to saying she's going to touch base with us soon. ... Touch base?
She's not American nor has she recently spent any time there - so just ... why? It makes me cringe every time.^

Touch base reminds me too much of touching cloth...

Someone mentioned cooking from scratch. I've seen worse, was describing I think bread rolls as "scratch" roles. Meaning made from scratch.
Hideous image that conjured up.

Inbox me makes me silently seeth. It makes absolutely no sense at all.

Hahaha love how grumpy everyone is.

'Up to 100%' as in 'up to 100% dandruff-free' etc. Well it's not going to be MORE than 100% and 'up to' = anything between nothing & everything! Raaaaaah!!

Anything described as "quite/very/rather unique."

Unique is an absolute, something is either unique or it isn't.

Ok In a roundup

1. Worst in the random words advertising category

The winner overall is Go Fun Yourself for bizarre sexual innuendo (a Saatchi special) followed by Feed my Funny and the faintly cannibalistic Eat Beautiful with special commendation to Find Your Happy and Be More Dog

1. In the stating the bloody obvious category - the list is long and heavy with food references , pan fried, oven baked, cooking from scratch etc etc

1. Finally topping the fucking annoying and creeping into everyday usage category is

My bad with special mention to Bang on trend, inbox me, touch base, Boom and the slightly old fashioned product

I could go on but now feel much more relaxed and de stressed as others have shared the pain!

Oh and all the crap that's talked about wine.... It's got a good mouth feel. WTF. If it doesn't dissolve my tongue or strip the enamel off my teeth then my mouth feels pretty good thanks.

I'm probably in the minority with the cooking from scratch things.

I've just googled to find out the origins of the from scratch part. I still think it has no relevance really in the context of cooking and is an unnecessary and annoying phrase.

It's cooking, and in the modern world of ready meals and takeaways it's seems that 'from scratch' is some kind of badge of honour.

One I remember from some cookery programme or book was 'This [foodstuff] eats really well with [other foodstuff]'. From Gary Rhodes perhaps? Not heard it lately (thank goodness).

It's cooking, and in the modern world of ready meals and takeaways it's seems that 'from scratch' is some kind of badge of honour.

To be fair, with all the premade sauces, premade soups, and premade marinades, cooking from scratch and making them yourself is a badge of honor. :)

ADHDNoodles special gold grumpy star for applying 'to be fair' in a genuine sense of, er, being fair, instead of the common usage of '... blah...'