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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not have special kids food at a wedding?

61 replies

ikeaismylocal · 01/08/2014 10:05

We are getting married next week, it only just came to my attention that people sometimes have a specific part of the buffet dedicated to "kids food" a friend of mine who is extremely limited in what he eats said "don't worry about doing something special for me I'll just take some food from the kids food section".

We weren't planning on having any "kids food" despite having 20 guests who are children, we have a toddler and he just eats normal food, it didn't really occur to me that there needed to be special kids food, there will be quite a selection of food including some quite plain options like pie and bread/crackers and cheeses.

Aibu to provide the same food for everyone? If we should provide food specifically for the kids what should it be?

OP posts:
CoffeeTea103 · 01/08/2014 10:08

Yanbu, have never heard of this. Your friend sounds precious, her child can eat the 'adults' food. I wouldn't stress over this.

MrsWinnibago · 01/08/2014 10:09

YANBU. Kids are humans and should be able to eat pie, bread, fruit and cake and cheese like adults!

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 01/08/2014 10:10

Keep to your original plan, same food for everyone.

Kids food? I wonder what they mean.

CuttingOutTheCrap · 01/08/2014 10:11

Wtf is kids food? Confused I assume he means the more 'junk food' type foods? - mini pies, pizzas, cocktail sausages? I'm sure there'll be something to please him whatever you've chosen, if not I'm also your friend can survive on 'grown up food' for one buffet!

EarthWindFire · 01/08/2014 10:11

YANBU. Stick to your plans Smile

toomuchtooold · 01/08/2014 10:12

Ask your friend what she would put in? I have no idea, am uncharitably thinking maybe it is.mini pizzas and fish fingers. My toddler would want a massive spread of blueberries and smoked salmon. The other one would take ham and ice cream. But no cheese. DT1no like cheese. DT1 like ham.

Sorry, I am not sure I'm being very helpful here!

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 01/08/2014 10:13

If you're having a sit-down meal people sometimes offer a plainer kid's choice, but I've never heard of that on a buffet. Surely that's the point of a buffet, lots of choices and people can pick the things they like?

Stick to the plan and have a wonderful day.

Gileswithachainsaw · 01/08/2014 10:14

Yanbu.

Unless it's all squid and goats cheese and caviar I can't think what the hell you could be serving that he couldn't eat Confused

mommy2ash · 01/08/2014 10:14

if you have 20 kids there I would have had some bits you are sure they would eat. nobody wants a hungry child at a wedding. I wouldn't have much of an issue with my dd as she isn't really fussy but some kids are. maybe ask some of your guests if their kids will eat from the regular buffet

MyNameIsSuz · 01/08/2014 10:14

My friend had this issue, her MIL wanted chips and nuggets for the children and was pretty horrified by the thought they might have to have the normal buffet (which was nothing unusual either). They didn't give in and I don't remember anyone having an issue. Don't worry about it! Though maybe give your friend a heads up if he's really that fussy so he can bring himself some snacks Grin

Middleagedmotheroftwo · 01/08/2014 10:15

Restaurants' and other catering establishments' ideas of kids' food is junk food. Cheapo nuggets, sausages, chips etc. I always used to ask for an extra small plate and we'd both give the DDs a bit of whatever we'd ordered.

I've never given them anything different to what we're eating, at home, or out and about.

Middleagedmotheroftwo · 01/08/2014 10:16

And, unless it's for medical reasons, I wouldn't provide special food for fussy adults either.
If medical reasons, I'd ensure that several of the dishes at a buffet were suitable for the relevant condition.

beccajoh · 01/08/2014 10:19

I've never heard of a kids food section at a buffet. Most people can find something to eat from a buffet! I wouldn't worry about it.

specialsubject · 01/08/2014 10:20

do nothing beyond what you've done. If you offer some items without meat, some that are plain for those that don't like spicy tastes and some without nuts, that's all the options anyone needs.

same for drink - non-alcoholic and non-fizzy options for those who are thirsty.

if your mate has serious allergies or health issues, he'll know how to cope. Otherwise he can always bring a sandwich. :-)

littlewhitebag · 01/08/2014 10:21

This is an actual adult we are talking about? He is being ridiculous.

What sort of stuff are you having on your buffet? i assume there will be some plainer stuff?

kiwimumof2boys · 01/08/2014 10:21

If parents have an extremely fussy eater like my DS1 wouldn't they bring extra snacks themselves for their DC? that's what I (and a lot of my friends) do. Just in case.

Original poster
ikeaismylocal · 01/08/2014 10:21

My friend really struggles with food, he doesn't eat pasta, pizza, rice, the only thong he'll eat when we go out and eat is a burger with nothing on it, no sauce, no lettuce. We don't have cooking facilities so I can't make him a burger, I asked what he could eat that could be on a cold buffet and he said please don't do something special, he's quite embarrassed about the things he can and can't eat. The wedding isn't until late afternoon/evening so maybe he plans to eat before the wedding.

I'll ask around my friends with kids if they are likely to eat standard buffet food, it's good to hear it's not a huge no-no not having specific kids food.

OP posts:
littlewhitebag · 01/08/2014 10:25

He knows he is fussy so i suspect he will eat before he comes.

ElephantsNeverForgive · 01/08/2014 10:25

Please make sure you have ham, cheese, bread, crackers and cocktail sausages and piles of ice cream.

I have one brilliant eater, with expensive tastes who would eat smoked salmon, prawns and quiche and drink champagne at three and one utter pain who still won't at 13.

5 minutes thought really can make your guests lives so, so much easier.

Likewise, lots of soft drinks and a bit of variety is really appreciated too.

Wantsunshine · 01/08/2014 10:26

Just interested what is your friend limited by what she can eat or does she just only like bland or food with chips. Just being nosy really!

Wantsunshine · 01/08/2014 10:26

Ignore my last have just refreshed thread

NurseRoscoe · 01/08/2014 10:28

I wouldn't expect a special kids buffet although some plain food like breadsticks, simple-ish sandwiches, crisps, fruit, cold meat etc would be nice if children were invited, I have a 1 and 3 year old who eat most things although things like sushi, strong cheese and spicy chicken on bones and stuff they wouldn't eat and I would happily bring them a sandwich or something (if this isn't rude) rather than expecting the hosts to cater for them

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 01/08/2014 10:28

I'm not quite as hard line as some posters, although it depends on what arrangements you've made. I take the view that 1. I'd like people to enjoy my wedding and 2. If I'm buying them dinner, I'd like them to eat/enjoy it. I'm a somewhat reformed fussy eater and have frequently gone for the veggie option at set dinners because I'm more likely to like it.

AnAwfullyGoodOxymoron · 01/08/2014 10:30

I went to a 40th party where they had a separate buffet table for the kids. Not that they couldn't have anything from the adult one. Just that it was a small selection of finger foods on a lower display so the many 2 year olds could all reach it. Carrot sticks, cherry toms, sausage rolls, bread sticks, cubed cheese etc etc.

AnAwfullyGoodOxymoron · 01/08/2014 10:31

Oh and the sarnies had the crusts cut off and were chopped into mouthful sized squares.