would you bu if you made a 12 year old clean up their own vomit?

[captainproton]

Child wakes up and vomits on his own bed and carpet in the middle of the night. Would you make them clean it up with no assistance from a parent, when said child is being repeatedly sick? The bouts of sickness have been ongoing for a couple of weeks now and seem to come on with no warning. Child is going to the doctor about it but mum has had enough of cleaning up sick, can't say I'd be too thrilled about it either.

I don't think it's unreasonable to get them to help out once they are better but if they are not well would you make them do it?

By the way I am not the child's parent. This happened to a colleague's son and she made them clean it up. There have been some jovial discussions here about whether or not she is a strict mum. I fall into the, 'would clean it up for them category'. I had an abusive mother and a weird upbringing, I would have been made to clear up my own sick after receiving a load of abuse. I don't know what is the normal thing to do. I assume there is an age when they have to do it for themselves, but is 12 too young?

I'm asking because I think I am in danger of babying my children when they are older owing to a rubbish childhood and I don't want to smother them. So when I hear of situations like this I am trying to work out what is the right thing to do.

Unless it's self induced I wouldn't expect someone I love to clear up their own vomit.

Bodily fluids are part of the less glamourous side to parenting

I would help my child, at any age, clean up their own vomit unless they were 17 + and a) they had been drinking b) had been attempting a man v. food challenge.

Crikey, what a horrible thing to do. It's almost a sort of "it's your fault, you sort it out" sort of attitude and makes me feel very sad. My Dd suffers from horrendous migraines and is very sick sometimes for hours the thought of telling her to clean it up is very nasty indeed. Poor child, I hope they feel better soon, that sounds dreadful.

I agree with the others, the only circumstances I think it's ok is if the kid is drunk (and obviously by default much older than 12)

I guess I kind of see why my sister made one of her kids (14) clean up their own vomit after they ate the whole chocolate cake she had told them not to touch in the fridge once. I still thought it was mean, but justified.

That is really mean. Her poor child

Jesus wept! Of course I'd clean it up - the child is a CHILD, and needs caring for and parenting! Dear god.

That's vile. DH still cleans up after me when I'm sick! I came from an abusive background as well fwiw.

And in our house, me, DH, and even the kids call it BOAK!

No I wouldn't, I don't think ds1 has ever made it to the toilet. He wakes up being sick, doesn't even know it's coming.

I sometimes know when it's going to happen as he coughs in his sleep so have sometimes managed over the years to grab something for him to be sick in.

I think its really cruel if the poor child has no warning

No I wouldn't make a child clean up their own vomit.

If someone was ill I would help them and that includes the cleaning up (especially the cleaning up) and all the little things that can make someone feel a little bit better ... cleaning their face, hair, helping with fresh clothing, fetching sips of water, and a basin in case they vomit again.

I would carry on helping even if it went on for days and even, dare I say it, if it were 'self inflicted'.

I would have a very poor opinion of an adult who didn't help someone who was ill in this way, unless that adult suffered from something like reactive vomiting ... and even then, if the ill person was a child, I would still expect the adult to help the child (albeit that the adult had to rush to the bathroom every now and again as their reactive vomiting was triggered ) IYSWIM

Oh he's 19 now and cleans up himself if it's drink induced (scary as he still doesn't wake up) but I'd clean up after him if he was ill and had woken up being sick.

No, I wouldn't

The only circumstances I'd do this would be if the child was drunk, and then only afterwards

Dish

Of course I'd clear up.

Why has she waited two weeks to take him to the doctor's?

I would clean it up for them because I love them. I would do the same for my husband. It's only vomit, no big deal.

I would clean it up

Actually that's a lie I would wake DH up so he could do it

But you get what I mean it's a parent thing

We have a sick bowl and if it kept happening it would be kept in the child's room

I also agree with the poster that said they wouldn't do it for a drunk 18 year old

So sad, 12 is of course way too young for a child to clean up after being sick. Your colleague sounds like a nasty piece of work. How devastating for a sick child to have to clean up after themselves. My son was a right little puker and from an early age he could puke into the toilet quite well. He never once cleaned up his own vomit and at now at 15 I would still clean up after him if he was sick. I have emetophobia and absolutely hate it but my concern for my DC would always win out.

What a weirdo

I have a terrible time dealing with vomit. I really, really can hardly stand it. But it would never occur to me to make my ill child, or my ill husband, clean up after themselves. You just take care of people you love. That poor little boy.

I would fetch my child a glass of water to sip and then clean the vomit myself.

There's nothing worse than throwing your guts up, feeling weak and shaky and then having to clean it all up yourself. I for one always feel extremely dizzy and faint after i am sick and want nothing more than to curl up in ball and go to sleep.

I clean up after my DC whilst running to the toilet to puke myself because of reactive vomiting. Even when almost incoherent with nausea I still do it. I am not saying this to look like a hero I am just trying to show how completely unacceptable it is to make a child clean up after themselves. Tell your colleague that from me!

If they are being that sick repeatedly I wouldn't expect anyone, adult or child to clear it up themselves

Mine are 19 & 15 and unless it was drink induced I would still help them. And I do not deal with vomit well - am heaving reading this thread.

I think that's unacceptable. I would only expect someone to clean up their own vomit if it was a self-inflicted drink or drugs incident and tbh even then I would probably do it if they were incapable (like I did for DH a couple of years ago, I was furious about it but I still did it).