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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that at a buffet you can take as much as you want

487 replies

Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 18:17

Went out today with dsis. We were starving by lunchtime and there was a huge buffet where we went (hotel), it was included in the price so we took loads as were hungry.
Noticed a couple of women really staring as we loaded our plates up and also when we took lots of the mini desserts and as we walked past one loudly said " I can't believe they are actually going to eat all that"
They kept staring at us and giving us funny looks.

Made me wonder if we really did take too much, surely as we had paid and were hungry it was ok ? I felt a bit judged as they clearly thought we were greedy

OP posts:
Fram · 20/07/2014 19:04

Shock 4 creme brulees? That's greed, not hunger! (when alongside other puddings too). No-one needs to eat 4 creme brulees, surely? I could eat 6 pieces of bread (depending on size, obviously)

tak1ngchances · 20/07/2014 19:04

I would have noticed too, especially the sux slices of bread and the four crême brûlée desserts. I always think people who take that much food at a buffet have never been anywhere in their lives and don't know how to behave.

LEMmingaround · 20/07/2014 19:04

Is there a mumsnet consensus on how much is ok to take at carveries and buffets? This is important and should be established

ChocolateWombat · 20/07/2014 19:05

The key point isn't if there were creme brûlées left or not (although it would be rude to take them all if there were quite a few, but some one has to take the last one)
The key thing is having manners and fitting in with how the restaurant wants it done. Small plates are to avoid waste. Doesn't matter if you ate every crumb, because other people who take lots of plates and pile them high, will waste food.
I guess at the end of the day, there are lots of people eating greedily at one of these buffets or on an all inclusive holiday. The small plates,sort of hide it a bit and make it more socially acceptable, but eat all you can buffets DO encourage gluttony. I'm sure other people ate as much as you did, however they disguised it a bit, by several visits. You were just blatant about your gluttony. And people genera
Ly don't like that and it is not seen as the right etiquette.

Fram · 20/07/2014 19:05

Ah... just seen you are bfing!

I could eat more than DH when bfing tbf. Had to be dairy-free though, so no creme brulee! Grin

Original poster
Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 19:07

My dd2 (4) has diabetes

OP posts:
itsbetterthanabox · 20/07/2014 19:08

It's hilarious that people think this is a fake thread! Loadsa people would eat that much at a buffet. Why go to a buffet if you're not gonna get a big variety of foods? I wouldn't bother if I was just gonna have a small plate of a couple of things. Also I really don't think there would be this much disgust and disbelief at the op if she were a man.
I don't know why anyone would judge.

ChocolateWombat · 20/07/2014 19:08

The question is, is it socially acceptable in a public place to be so blatant about our greed and the fact we cannot wait to scoff, or allow time away from scoffing to queue up again?
The OP is so blatant in her desire for a HUGE feed. I think it is this, as much as the amount of food which is controversial. Most people have a sense that even if they are being very greedy, they don't want the world to know. the OP didn't care.

Original poster
Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 19:09

I will remember next time to go up and get more then rather than lots at once

OP posts:
BOFster · 20/07/2014 19:10

I don't believe breastfeeding makes that much difference. Unless you are breastfeeding Godzilla.

LEMmingaround · 20/07/2014 19:10

So that list of food was not just for you op?

Original poster
Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 19:10

I think hunger got the better of me.

OP posts:
Goldenyellow · 20/07/2014 19:10

That is a huge amount of food. Did you really need that much?

Original poster
Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 19:11

He's 2 so feels like it sometimes!

Yes, that was what I ate, dsis a similar amount

OP posts:
Skina · 20/07/2014 19:11

I would judge a man just as much if they had taken that many plates of food and puddings. That is a ridiculous amount of food for anyone.

andmyunpopularopionis · 20/07/2014 19:11

Wow. That's just gluttony really and I like food. I agree that at a buffet you take a reasonable amount and go back for seconds, thirds etc,

I would probably have made a comment to my kids, using you as an example of what is not acceptable, and wouldn't care if you heard it either.

HercShipwright · 20/07/2014 19:12

Itsbetterthan I would be equally disgusted if the OP were a man. That is a gigantic amount of food, and the hogging of the desert items - and the number of desert items - is particularly yucky. They provide a choice of these things because people are supposed to choose between them. Not so that someone can eat them all. Buffets are intended to cater for different tastes, not be an excuse for greed.

MaryWestmacott · 20/07/2014 19:12

Was that 6 full slices of bread? That about 550-600 calories alone right there, before you ate anything else.

People stared because that's a lot of food. They were rude to comment, but public greed isn't really acceptable.

Goldenyellow · 20/07/2014 19:13

A huge amount of sugar and carbs too. Isn't your daughter diabetic?

ChocolateWombat · 20/07/2014 19:13

hedgehog, I think that would help you avoid the stares and comments. Probably those people who commented were eating as much as you, but they just didn't go about it so blatantly. Even in places where most people are pigging out, most prefer to give the impression that they are not. You just contravened that unspoken rule.
What you ate sounds like a HUGE amount to me and far more than anyone could need, but you were entitled to have as much as you liked in total, although probably not all in one go.
Enjoy your food at these places! You obviously did. I'd stick to the 1-plate at a time thing, not just because people judge you otherwise, but to respect the restaurant as well.

itsbetterthanabox · 20/07/2014 19:13

Seriously op don't bother doing multiple visits just so other people don't feel awkward at the idea that women eat!

HercShipwright · 20/07/2014 19:14

If people saw a horde of locusts descending, they would stare. This seems to be a similar situation!

OnIlkleyMoorBahTwat · 20/07/2014 19:14

Even if all those things listed were little shot sized things, that is a lot of food.

Nine puddingy things after loads of bread, salads and soup.

I'm just a bit Envy about my tiny appetite as I can never finish what is served as a restaurant meal. On the Toby Carvery thread, people are talking about multiple Yorkshire puddings and bottomless jugs of custard with puddings and I'm stuffed after about half a roast dinner, so I never get to experience the joy that is treacle sponge and unlimited custard Sad.

OnlyLovers · 20/07/2014 19:15

Oh, do shut up everyone about how much the OP ate and how much she might weigh!

WorraLiberty · 20/07/2014 19:15

I think hunger got the better of me

Perhaps you should genuinely ask yourself this OP

If you had to order those items individually from the menu and pay for them accordingly, would you still have eaten that exact amount?

If the answer is yes, then perhaps it really was hunger.

If the answer is no, then imo it was greed.

Some people genuinely can't tell the difference between the two.