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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that at a buffet you can take as much as you want

487 replies

Edenviolet · 20/07/2014 18:17

Went out today with dsis. We were starving by lunchtime and there was a huge buffet where we went (hotel), it was included in the price so we took loads as were hungry.
Noticed a couple of women really staring as we loaded our plates up and also when we took lots of the mini desserts and as we walked past one loudly said " I can't believe they are actually going to eat all that"
They kept staring at us and giving us funny looks.

Made me wonder if we really did take too much, surely as we had paid and were hungry it was ok ? I felt a bit judged as they clearly thought we were greedy

OP posts:
MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:18

Eh, not sure what the PA response is for. Genuine question - lots of people seem to assume it was an all you can eat buffet with continual replenishment. I can't see where the OP says that.

Her first post: there was a huge buffet where we went (hotel), it was included in the price

So it was a buffet provided by the hotel, but nowhere does it say it was an all you can eat deal.

Just trying to clarify. My main problem with the OP piling her plates is that it might appear that she took far more than her fair share, which is not good manners at all. If it was indeed an all you can eat deal, my main objection is rendered moot.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 21/07/2014 17:28

I thought all buffets at hotels were all you can eat.

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:35

I thought all buffets at hotels were all you can eat

I'm sure many are, but equally, many will not be. Perhaps I've read it entirely wrong (perfectly possible!) but I get the impression that the OP was at an event at a hotel. I would be very surprised if an "event plus buffet lunch" meant an all you can eat deal (although it's perfectly possible!).

However, it occurs to me that I hadn't considered that the OP may have just visited the hotel specifically for an all you can eat buffet lunch!

Her day took weeks of planning and a 9-5 day though....

I don't know, I'm probably jaded by too many hotel events with limited buffets where all the vegetarian food is snaffled by carnivores and I'm left with a celery stick Smile

LightastheBreeze · 21/07/2014 17:37

Agree Chickenfajita They are a business, you pay your money - probably quite a lot and then you eat the food. I certainly wouldn't be worrying about all the people I didn't know getting their fair share, surely its up to the hotel to provide it.

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:40

Tangent question - do the plate pilers behave similarly at buffets where there is clearly a finite amount of food e.g. at a wedding?

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:41

I certainly wouldn't be worrying about all the people I didn't know getting their fair share, surely its up to the hotel to provide it

But what if it isn't up to the hotel? What if the event organisers have paid £X for a buffet for Y people? The hotel isn't just going to chuck on extra food, are they?

LightastheBreeze · 21/07/2014 17:47

If it is a wedding or friends party I would always take a small amount as the host has provided the party food and am very careful about taking too much, vegetarian food etc but if it is a business providing it then I take what I want as it is up to them to provide the service I have paid for. Most others, usually men pile their plate high anyway but if a (slim) man does it it is seen as OK and not piggish.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 21/07/2014 17:50

Maid of course not. An occasional buffet blow out at a hotel buffet doesn't mean one doesn't know how to behave at a wedding, friends's house, Christmas buffet type occasions. I've only had 4 buffet breakfasts this year that cost 40 per head at a hotel. There is no way in a million years I'm going to only eat an egg on toast.

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:51

but if it is a business providing it then I take what I want as it is up to them to provide the service I have paid for

Understood. But what if they haven't provided masses and some people are left with nothing? I get your point that it's not really your fault, but you could help by not taking masses?

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 17:52

I've only had 4 buffet breakfasts this year that cost £40 per head at a hotel. There is no way in a million years I'm going to only eat an egg on toast

Of course, I accept this and fully understand. I was just wondering if this was in fact the type of buffet the OP was sampling from.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 21/07/2014 17:57

Oh I see your point. I just assumed it was like a holiday type buffet.

LightastheBreeze · 21/07/2014 18:02

Maybe the OP will come back and say if it was holiday/hotel all you can eat type buffet, an event buffet or a private party buffet, as it does make a difference to how one would behave with the piling of the plate. Grin

itsbetterthanabox · 21/07/2014 18:05

Lightasabreeze it was an all you can buffet. It wasn't an event.

ICanSeeTheSun · 21/07/2014 18:11

If hotels wanted it limited then they need to employ servers, but servers cost money and it's cheaper for the hotel to have a self service all you can eat buffet than pay someone a wage.

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 18:16

itsbetterthanabox it was an all you can buffet. It wasn't an event

I can't see where the OP has clarified this.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 21/07/2014 18:17

I think it's a pretty normal thing to do now and again. A bit like ramming all the sweets in a pick a mix cup and desperately trying to squeeze the lid on it can't just be me

MaidOfStars · 21/07/2014 18:18

Olives. It's like a game, to see how many I can fit in the tub.

Beautifullymixed · 21/07/2014 18:22

Wow! The OP bowed out on page 16 after tiring of defending herself against rude, ill mannered posters. Her weight,diet and manners were picked apart and scrutinised.

She,however replied with patience and grace, and received 'flowers' for her calmness. I would not have been so calm.

Three pages on and posters are still dissecting her eating habits, and making uncalled for remarks.

Some while back I believe someone said something about 'getting a life'.
It does seem apt in this situation.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 21/07/2014 18:26

I bet nearly everyone has had a 4 creme brle/half a tin of quality street/whole tube of pringles moment. The only thing Hedgehog did wrong was have hers when there were some big mouthed rude people around.

firesidechat · 21/07/2014 18:46

Having read the last few posts, I think some clarification from the OP would be useful now. I don't think she will be back however.

There is a huge difference between going to an all you can eat buffet in a restaurant and a buffet at some kind of hotel event. Huge difference.

The only event where "huge buffet...hotel....included in the price" would be happening would be a conference or some such? Is that right OP?

firesidechat · 21/07/2014 19:01

Lightasabreeze it was an all you can buffet. It wasn't an event.

Well I've just gone back over all the OP's posts and at no point does she mention all you can eat buffets. I think a few posters assumed, the OP didn't correct us and it snowballed form there.

She said it was in a hotel and food was included in the price and it was from 9am - 5pm. Sounds like a hotel event to me and I think it does change things. The food would have been for a finite number of people.

Beautifullymixed · 21/07/2014 19:05

Still picking apart the 0P and wanting clarification of what???

I swear I've never paid that much attention to my own food let alone someone elses Shock
The OP gave information for 16 pages and then gave up.

And you want more. Why?

So you can finally decide for yourself whether she's a greedy pig or not.......

Unbelievable.

Beautifullymixed · 21/07/2014 19:06

That's for fireside .

TheBogQueen · 21/07/2014 19:08

Op just asked a question: Was she greedy?

Some people thought that Yes she was greedy.

she asked

firesidechat · 21/07/2014 19:11

Thanks, but if you look back over my posts on here, I have not been at all horrible to the OP. In fact I supported her right to overeat at an all you can eat buffet. I just feel like I was answering the wrong question now.

I just like food threads and I'm a natural born pedant. Thanks very much.