to be disappointed that some of my family hate our PFB's name

[bexleigh]

Our little boy is 7 weeks old and some of my family don't like the name we chose. This includes my dad and my grandmother. Their first reaction on the day he was born was "Really? ... Oh. Right. Well, it's not really my cup of tea, no. I'm not a fan". The next day I thought they might have gotten used to it, but no, "I just can't get used to it. I think I'll call him the initial". And ever since the birth they've avoided referring to him with his actual name, instead they make up pet names.

I didn't announce the name before the birth, wanting to avoid negative comments, and expected people to be too polite afterwards to say anything if they didn't like the name. So I feel that this is quite rude. However, they probably see it as being open and "wearing their heart on their sleeve". It just hurts my feelings though! My dad is a kind and loving man but can sometimes be a bit tactless.

Btw, it's not a really wacky name, not made up or strangely spelt, just a traditional name which is uncommon these days.u

the thing is.....if FAMILY , who love you and love the baby react badly to a name-what kind of reaction do you think that strangers will have throughout your child's life?

in my experience, people who give their children very unusual names tend to have very normal names themselves and have no idea how tough an unusual name can be.

i think that before calling your child a 'unique' name, you should have to live a couple of months using that name yourself. start a new job with it, introduce yourself to strangers as it, go to a hospital appointment with it etc
if you are happy with the reactions you have had, haven't found it too much of a pain in the arse then go ahead and call your child it.

Although I quite like Q.

Oh, Slitherey was a wind up - how disappointing! (And there was me thinking again "Only on Mumsnet", with a fond , resigned shake of the head.)

Seriously, though, it's not much worse than some of the offerings on the Baby Names section....

It's a lovely name. Congratulations!!

I love the name Quentin. I also think Q is a fab nickname xx

I knew a Quentin when I was growing up. His siblings were Melissa, Lydia and Theo. I was always desperately jealous that they had such gorgeous glamorous names when the rest of us at school were all called nice plain 70s classics like Lisa and Beverley!

I Where I come from Quentin is a fairly common enough name - not overused but certainly not unusual. I can't imagine anyone batting an eyelid.

Your family members are being hurtful and rude. correct them so they know.

My MiL did not like DDs name - said it was foreign - so never used it
called her by a nickname
we just shrugged

I like Quentin. I think Tarantino when I hear it.
So it's a super cool movie directors name!

I was going to say you are contractually obliged to tell us the name, but then I scrolled down!

Quentin is fine. I went to school with one. He was a dude. Sometimes was called TinTin.

Your family are being rotten. Feck em. And you are within your rights to encourage them to use his correct name.

He will grow into it. I knew a baby called Arthur. Far more character building than Quentin, and he will also grow into it.

My mum would have been called "Wolfgang" if she was a boy- seriously:)
My nan was German, my mum thankfully was a girl and was then given a very normal English name!

I suspect that Quentin might well be a bit marmite. Personally I love it, but that's because I had a small cousin Quentin.

It could be seen as uber posh or not 'manly' enough by some, but I doubt will generally raise more than an initial eyebrow. Q is a great nickname, but not for a baby I think (only downside of Quentin is that there are few obvious nicknames).

I don't think that names have to be strange to upset or non plus people. When dh was named his grandmother apparently said 'oh no, that's a dog's name' - he was given the no1 most popular name in his birth year (Jason).

OP I'd really just give it a bit more time, see your family less if you can help it, say his name lots when you do and wait for them to get over it. It may just be that it feels to them like an odd name for a small baby, are the pet names bad? My babies always had a lot of pet names, although granted most of them were names I gave them.

That's reminded me that my MIL asked what my DB had called his baby and when I said she was Sophie, she looked disgusted and declared it "a dog's name". But my MIL is often not a very nice person

Are any of these relatives at all homophobic? Someof the older generation will perhaps associate the name Quentin with Quentin Crisp rather than Quentin Tarrantino?
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ea/Quentincrisp1.jpg
BTW, I like it... If you do, that's all that matters. I would not allow relies and friends to shorten it (especially to Q....something you do in stores!) and would correct them every single time until they called him Quentin every time. How dare anyone try to push their own choices on your son just because they personally don't like the name?!
Start calling these relatives such names as Ethelberta and Englebert as loudly as you can in public places....when they complain just point out that you don't like their name so have decided to call them something of your own choosing! :)
Out of curiosity, is he your fifth? Quentin means born fifth... :)

We made the mistake of telling my DM our intentions for the name of our youngest prior to her being born.
She was incredulous we'd decided on such a hideous, awful, ridiculous name and was so awful about it I backed out and refused to use it in the end.
OH was furious as I'd taken us 4 months to agree on any name we both liked. My mother just really put me off and made me feel I'd be an utter bitch to my daughter for calling her such a dreadful name.

The name was Kirsten if anyone's interested.

Love Quentin :)

The only time I have been even slightly negative was my Canadian cousin who now lives in the UK when she told me when pregnant that she was going to call their unborn DD Randy....

I just gently pointed out the meaning over here, I know it's fairly common in Canada and the USA. They did call her Randy and I never said anything at any point after she was born.

Love Kirsten too!

Kirsten is a great name. Honestly..... people are mad!!!!

The only name I ever had a slight eyebrow raise at was one that was a medical term for something a bit uncomfortable. It is also a perfectly normal name in Spain and Portugal. My own DS's name is really similar to a swear word in Greek, so I have been told.

Oh, no, I did have an eyebrow raise at the godchild of a work colleague's.... It is Ptolemy. But it suits him, and a 3 year old Tolly is just way beyond cute. :)

Quentin is fine.

Sheesh, I thought OP would come up with some name like... I dunno, something not remotely English at least. Something that sounded like it belonged to a cat, was impossible to spell or meant "kick me hard" in another language.

Thank you toobreathless.

I was shocked a name we liked and considered at worst not everyone's cup of tea but inoffensive could spark a conversation from my mother along the lines of "don't take the piss! You are winding me up!"

There are names I dislike but I would never ever tell the new parents. It's so rude.

I do think when it comes to other peoples choices for the names of their children, even close family members should keep their beaks out, smile, nod and say nothing mean.

Congratulations on your new baby.

Quentin is a lovely name.

To be frank - fuck them all. Turn it round on its head and take a little bit of joy every time people question it or make a comment.

Just enjoy your beautiful newborn.

ladyintheradiator I have a Xanthe too and had a similar reaction from pil to start off with, culminating with "are you still calling her that?" towards the end of pregnancy and the like. Mil avoided using the name for the first few months of dd's life but she got over it in the end.

I wonder if they see the name very differently from how you see it?

There are a few names that I might associate with someone cool and contemporary, that others might associate with something else.

I think the Quentin Tarantino thing is a case in point.

I like the name Anita but I've never had a positive reaction to it. I also like Ray but I can see others might not like that.

Give it time. I still think they are rude though