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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not let someone go ahead of me at the checkout

136 replies

spababe · 13/07/2014 13:02

OK so I was shopping at Lidl and had a small trolley full of groceries. There were only 3 checkouts open so we all had to queue. The woman behind me asked if she could go ahead of me as she only had a couple of things. I asked her if there was any particular reason and she said no so I pointed out I had to queue too and she backed down.

It felt as if she was saying her time was more important than mine. She had no special reason eg had to catch a train so why should I let her go ahead and queue jump me?

OP posts:
Fudgeface123 · 13/07/2014 13:08

I wouldn't have let her in either. I've done it once for an elderly lady who looked like she was struggling to stand but no, not for anyone else

Jinsei · 13/07/2014 13:09

YANBU, if she didn't have a particular reason. But I'd have let her go anyway.

HappyAgainOneDay · 13/07/2014 13:10

I don't know whether I'd have agreed or not. I would take the initiative and offer her my place though if I were in that situation. Did you know that she was in the queue before she spoke to you?

NellysKnickers · 13/07/2014 13:12

I normally let people go in front if they only have a couple of things and I have loads. Depends how she asked I suppose.

Lagoonablue · 13/07/2014 13:12

I would if I had a trolley and she only had a couple of items. A lot of people would.

ObfusKate · 13/07/2014 13:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mrsdavidcaruso · 13/07/2014 13:12

I agree sometimes out of the goodness of my heart I will OFFER to let someone with only a few things go first. For instance the other day there was a lady who I know gets a certain bus, its hourly and she might have missed it so I let her go in front of me, but she didn't ask me to.

VioletHare · 13/07/2014 13:13

As far as I'm concerned it's just common curtesy to let someone with a couple of items nip in front of you if you have a trolley load.

I've done it (offered) for others and have had others do it for me.

No of course you don't have to. It's just nice to.

MaloryArcher · 13/07/2014 13:13

YANBU.

It's nice if offered but should never be assumed or asked for.

I had a passive aggressive version of this in the shop yesterday when I was tutted and sighed at by a woman behind me who had 2 items. I had a basket full.

At 38 weeks pregnant and bursting for a pee there was no chance! I may even have gone a wee bit slower to piss her off more Grin .

Original poster
spababe · 13/07/2014 13:16

I think if you offer then that is one thing but to be asked is just arrogant and cheeky.

OP posts:
Oldraver · 13/07/2014 13:20

I would offer if I noticed..... but yes, would think someone cheeky, depends how they asked

VioletHare · 13/07/2014 13:21

But then it begs the question why you wouldn't offer to let someone in front of you.

chesterberry · 13/07/2014 13:21

YANBU to not let somebody go in front of you, there is no obligation to let others in front if you don't want to. Personally I do normally let people go ahead of me if they only have a couple of items and I have a trolley full though. I just figure them going in front of me only adds a minute or so to how long I have to queue but could shave a good five minutes off how long they're queuing. To me it's the same courtesy I would show by letting a parent with a young child who was struggling to queue go ahead of me.

I wouldn't let somebody with a similar number of items to me in front of me without a good reason mind, only when I have a lot of shopping and they have very little. I hate being stuck behind a queue of people with over-flowing trolleys, each of which will take 5+ minutes at the checkout, when I literally just have 1 or 2 things to get and know I will be through the checkout within a minute. I always appreciate it when somebody lets me pop in front of them, although I don't judge people who don't let me in front of them or feel entitled to jumping the queue. I would never expect it or ask unless I was in a rush.

Merel · 13/07/2014 13:22

I think it's really considerate if I have a couple of items and someone with a massive trolley load lets me go first. I'd never ask though.

I don't think YWBU to decline the request, but asking for her a reason probably came over a bit off. A simple 'Sorry, I'm in a rush too' or something similar would have been adequate.

gamerchick · 13/07/2014 13:23

It depends on what mood im in.. if I have a full trolley and somebody comes behind me with a couple of things I might..despite thats the usual trick that people pull so they get in front.

But the ones who come up and do repeated leaning into your eye line get ignored because it's irritating.

There's no need in lidl anyway because the tills move that quick so nobody queues for that long.

gamerchick · 13/07/2014 13:23

*aldi even

stripedtortoise · 13/07/2014 13:24

Depends how she asked. I've let people go infront if they only have a few things and i have loads and they've either been polite or elderly or struggling with young children, but otherwise they can sod off :)

Gruntfuttock · 13/07/2014 13:26

I always offer to let someone with only a few items go ahead of me. The only reason why I wouldn't do that is if I had a very pressing reason to leave the store a.s.a.p, such as a train to catch. If someone asked to go ahead, before I'd noticed them or offered, then of course, I'd let them except in special circumstances as above.

MilkandCereal · 13/07/2014 13:26

I'd always allow a person immediately behind me with just one or two items to go ahead of me. It's normal to me,and polite. If I was in a hurry then perhaps not,but otherwise I have no problem with it.

susiedaisy · 13/07/2014 13:26

Depends, I usually let people through if they literally have a pint of milk or a loaf of bread and they are stuck behind several people with loaded trolleys but if they have half a dozen things then no they have to queue like everyone else. It is annoying though how lidl don't have a basket only checkout.

ScouseBird8364 · 13/07/2014 13:26

OP, how many items did she have, compared to you?

I let a guy in front of me in Lidle the other day, as I had half a trolley full and he only had a bottle of Alcohol. However, I moved tills then as the other one became less busy, and then a woman came behind me with 2 items, I wasn't going to do it again, as I'd have been there all night! Anyway, she must've been waiting for me to offer as she literally slammed her items down on the conveyer belt thingy!

I think once is courteous, but no more!

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:27

some days i do let them ahead some days i dont. it seems to be the norm in lidl/aldi to ask. seldom happens in any other place ime. if i am still unlaoding well and good i let them ahead or have even suggested someone behine me go ahead. but one day i was ready, in a rush and this lady ... as she was manoeuvering around my trolley to get in front said, not asked, "i just have a few bits" and i thought heeeelll to the no and politely but sarcastically said "excuse me there is a queue. im in a rush too". she annoyed me.

HappyAgainOneDay · 13/07/2014 13:27

spababe I asked if you knew she was there before she asked you. You have not answered that yet.

gamerchick · 13/07/2014 13:28

There is also the ones who watch who's letting the one behind through.. sometimes you could be there letting them all past if it's all timed right Grin

SiennaBlake · 13/07/2014 13:29

If you had a shit load of stuff, it would have been nice to let her nip in front of you. I don't think asking makes her arrogant or cheeky. I think it makes her smart. It's always worth a try and if she had asked the right person, she would have been away.

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