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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not let someone go ahead of me at the checkout

136 replies

spababe · 13/07/2014 13:02

OK so I was shopping at Lidl and had a small trolley full of groceries. There were only 3 checkouts open so we all had to queue. The woman behind me asked if she could go ahead of me as she only had a couple of things. I asked her if there was any particular reason and she said no so I pointed out I had to queue too and she backed down.

It felt as if she was saying her time was more important than mine. She had no special reason eg had to catch a train so why should I let her go ahead and queue jump me?

OP posts:

QueenHaakonVII · 13/07/2014 13:31

YANBU

I have declined when people have asked to jump ahead of me. I just say I am sorry but I am in a hurry. I'm always in a hurry I do offer people to skip the queue sometimes.

I am fairly proactive about asking shops to find another cashier. no shame me

Gruntfuttock · 13/07/2014 13:31

ScouseBird8364, I'd have let the woman go ahead of me too.

I suppose it just goes to show that I must be even lovelier than you are!

Of course, one person's 'lovely' is another person's 'doormat'.

Seriously, though, it's no skin off my nose to let someone go ahead. I'm never in so much of a hurry that it'll make any difference, but I realise that wouldn't apply to everyone, by any means.

Original poster

spababe · 13/07/2014 13:32

I had a small trolley worth so maybe 20 items. She had 2. Didn't look any further behind her to see about the next person. Don't think it's my fault if Lidl don't have a baskets only checkout - everyone knows that when they go in.

OP posts:

chesterberry · 13/07/2014 13:33

some days i do let them ahead some days i dont. it seems to be the norm in lidl/aldi to ask. seldom happens in any other place ime.

That's interesting. I have only recently started shopping in Lidl and I find that people are far less likely to let me go in front than in other supermarkets. I usually only have a couple of items (I mainly only use Lidl for fruit/veg, they don't tend to stock anything else I regularly buy) and most other shoppers seem to have huge trolleys but I have never had anybody let me go in front of them in Lidl. There is usually only 1 checkout open and long queues so maybe this makes people less willing to lose their place.

Original poster

spababe · 13/07/2014 13:34

I too am new to Lidl so didn't realise this was common practice in there!!

OP posts:

dawndonnaagain · 13/07/2014 13:35

Shame, you had an opportunity to be nice, and you weren't.

offtoseethewizard64 · 13/07/2014 13:36

If you only had a small trolley then YANBU.

I always have a large trolley and if the person behind me has a few items in a basket, I usually let them go in front of me. However, if the next person to come up behind me then only has a basket, I don't let them in front otherwise I could be there all day. They are mostly retired people who've probably got more time to stand around than me anyway.

I think if you shop in Lidl, you have to accept that there a only a few tills open and there is no express till, so expect to queue and wait your turn - otherwise shop at one of the other supermarkets where there are separate tills for people with only a few items.

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:36

chesterberry my local lidl is the same .. alot less tills open that aldi and i only ever have a few items in lidl but a trolley in aldi. it still doesnt stop people from asking (watching others) but its more the norm in aldi for sure.

Longdistance · 13/07/2014 13:38

My experience of shopping at Aldi and Lidl for the past near 20 years, is that you always let the person with only a few items in front of you regardless.

So, YWBU to not let her through, you're not at Tesco's. You don't get your bags packed, and you're literally chucked out the store after paying anyway.

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:39

offtoseethewizard i totally agree. i have to laugh at someone saying "im just gonna run in for bottle wine" etc in aldi. yeah that part will take ye 2 secs. queueing however will be a tad bit longer lol. its part of going there. you have to expect delays. otherwise bugger off to a local shop.

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:40

Longdistance is there a poster in store that states that??? queue is a queue is a queue. its up to the person in front to say yes or no. ye might not like the answer but hey ho thats life.

PogoBob · 13/07/2014 13:40

I've often let someone with a couple of items go in front of me if I've a trolley load, not so much these days as the last time I did it the person proceeded to chat away to the check-out person and take an age to sort out their money for the 3 items they'd got not giving a thought to the rest of us behind her! If I'm courteous to other people I expect a little courtesy back (and there was no reason for her to go slow was just gossiping!)

Flipflops7 · 13/07/2014 13:42

I offer anyone, and if they are elderly I always wave them in front.

There is just something not right about being asked. Someone asked me to allow them in front on an airport security line. They seemed really entitled so I just said no. Also to the person who asked me to press the lift button in a department store.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 13/07/2014 13:43

I always let people with a couple of items go ahead of me, unless I only have a couple myself. I've never been asked to but I always offer. I've had this offered to me too on the rare occasions that I don't have much - it's a kindness.

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:44

i get you flipflops. its like those that deserve to go ahead never ask. weird i know. but i will offer ... but if you ask, hmmm i dunno. could go either way. its like someone at a junction stopped at the line, i will slow down and let them out. but someone with their nose over the line and agressively nudge out, i will most likely drive around them than let them out.

SaucyJack · 13/07/2014 13:45

YANBU if you didn't want to. No reason why she shouldn't queue like everyone else.

lilrascal · 13/07/2014 13:45

i must have "soft touch" written across me head am always asked!

Glastokitty · 13/07/2014 13:45

Really flip flops, you refused to push a lift button for someone? Why?

Longdistance · 13/07/2014 13:46

No it doesn't have sign Lil it's called common sense and being polite. People ask in places like Aldi and Lidl as there aren't any basket checkouts as stated in pp's.

Never heard or seen anyone refuse someone a few items to go in front of them really wishes these new people that shop at Aldi and Lidl would bog off

Gruntfuttock · 13/07/2014 13:46

Of those who would never offer or allow anyone to go ahead of them at the checkout, have any of you accepted such an offer from another shopper?

Ohkermy · 13/07/2014 13:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 13/07/2014 13:48

My favourite queue jumpy time (and I've told this before )
was a woman in the queue with a basket (Sainsburys so they do have Self Check and basket only) , kind shopper-with-trolley lets her go in front and she calls her husband over with a FULL TROLLEY )

I was desperately earwigging in the next queue as I packed and tried to see how it panned out

Fight? ?

starfishmummy · 13/07/2014 13:51

But where does it stop? You let one person in because they have a couple of items, then while you are still waiting someone else comes along...

Gruntfuttock · 13/07/2014 13:51

70isaLimitNotaTarget that is outrageous! I can hardly believe anyone would behave like that! She must've known the person only let her go in front because she only had a basket, so how the hell did she think calling her husband over with his full trolley was in any way acceptable? I would've let her know what I thought of her if I'd been the kind person who made the offer.

Flipflops7 · 13/07/2014 13:52

Glasto,

She was an able-bodied affluent looking woman a few years older than me ( in my 20s at the time) who barked the floor number at me and waited expectantly. I looked down at my clothes but no, I was not wearing uniform.

HTH.

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