AIBU to think that 35 is too old...

[teeththief]

...have another baby?

I had my dd at 41

You must be living in a parallel universe to mine. I had my first kid at 30 in NYC and to be honest I felt a bit like a teen mother, all our friends were still living in their extended adolescence and shuddering at the prospect.

Now I'm 43 and we're TTC number 3, and it all seems pretty normal.

Steady Handmaiden. It might be increasingly common, but fertility does decline after 35, very rapidly in fact. So some people are lucky after that age and some people aren't.

It's a crazy state of affairs when a poster is called a 'dick' just for asking the question in a really friendly way. About herself. 15 months ago

Blimey, I never saw the date of the OP. Plus I'm biased as I had my first last March at 42 and am currently 6 months pregnant with my second at 44

Any discerned reading will reveal the myth of fertility rapidly declining at 35.

Everyone's biased one way or the other on this subject. Until you make close friends, with the opposite circumstances, maybe.

Let's not all call each other 'dick' though.

Oh I got called a dick and I missed it!

For those who asked.....yes we did attempt it but, after two miscarriages we decided that my body obviously wasn't up to it. Congratulations to all of those who have had babies over the age of 35 since I first posted though! X

You're not the dick monitor though,

Noooo, that's why I suggested that we not all call each other names.

so I shall continue to call it whomever I so wish

You're much, much too old for pouting Handmaiden

All of my "mum friends" from the baby groups I go to are all in there mid-30's to early 40's with first or second babies....I'm the odd one out at 21. People are right when they say that in this day and age, most people in their 20's are still in education, or working their first "proper job", enjoying their partying days. Plus a lot of people don't get married/settle with a long term partner until their 30's anyway!
Personally, I want my baby-making days to be behind me once I hit my late 20's, purely because I will be 38 when my DD turns 18 - I don't want to have any more babies when I've got a teenager. But if it's right for you and your family, then 35 is most definitely not too old!!

Come over to the conception threads, you'll find a load of us mid to late thirties who are ttc. I'm 35 and ttc my first.

Your parents are a completely different generation, you can't compare yourself to them.

Unless you have an older DP, or inherited money I don't see how you can possibly have a child when young. Most women are in education until 21yrs and then need to be established in a job. I was an older mother, but we were nearly all older at the school gate.
Women used to go on having them until older before birth control. In my family history the woman is still having children when her eldest are married and producing children. Fertility doesn't always decline- I got pregnant first attempt at 37yrs and 39yrs.
35 yrs is quite young theses days. I could see the point in asking if it was 45 yrs.

I had my third at 35 and felt old. I suspect that this was entirely to do with the first and second though.my friend who had her first at 35 still felt quite young!

If you want a third 35 is fine (but get move on in case you are in the group whose fertility falls fast. )

had dd2 aged 35, im 45 now - knackered!! lol

I was 35 when I had DS. He is comin up to 10 months old and cuddled up to me on the sofa with his bedtime milk. We are plannng number 2 and then possibly number 3!

Sorry to hear that teeth Hope you find a solution (either by keep trying or being happy with not having any more DC)

Im looking forward to my 40's and having DC's that dont require as much help etc from me. They will have friends to sit through Frozen (or whatever film it is) for the 100th time that week. They can shower themselves. They may even help with some household chores themselves

We moved 3.5 years ago. Before that we were quite old parents (had DS at 26, DD1 at 29 and DD2 at 32), but now we are the youngest parents around here.

Regarding jobs and career etc I have just started my career path in these last few years (even though Im still not 100% certain what I actually want to do)

It woylf be old around here. I had mine at 30/33 and most if the muims at school are at least 10 years younger!

But the area I actually had my first I was the youngest of my group (more professional area). Here is a culture shock to me but most seem to gave kids young, have family around the corner, friends from school to play date with etc. Its a nice community (even if I don't quite fit!)

I suspect 35 is very average or even youngish here. I'm a total freak having two kids before the age of 30 and don't fit in at all, too old for the teen mums too. Luckily we had money to buy a place when I was 26, as house prices here probably force up the age of parenthood.

I also wonder about fertility, not everyone is fortunate so perhaps if I wanted a third at 35 I wouldn't be so lucky despite falling pregnant twice without trying - first unplanned.

But pouting is how I got myself pregnant!

I used to think that was too old but now I'm of that vintage and still want another one it doesn't seem so old!

My 'D'F thought I was old having my 3rd at the ripe old age at 29... o_0

Oh hello Teeth - now that is unusual, for the OP of a zombie thread to come back when it's reinvigorated! Sorry that it didn't work out for you though (but see my friend's story - never say never!)

Have you given all your baby stuff away? that seems to be a trigger for an unexpected pregnancy (see friend of mine again).

OP, your parents got going early, which was normal for that generation. But the past is another country.

I had my DD at 42. My friend had her first DS at 47 and her second at 49.

Health and fitness matter more than chronological age, at least before 45 or so, when peri menopause kicks in. We have to accept the natural end of fertility, but you have a few good breeding years yet.

Err 36 here and currently feeding dd2 - 4 months old....

I had my 3rd at 35 and it was too old, for me.