Was DH unreasonable to ask the neighbour's kids

[differenttoyou]

to go inside at 9.40 this morning. There were 3 of them and they'd been outside on their trampoline (which buts right up to the fence) since 8.00 am singing at the top of their voices. Eventually we couldn't take it any longer as they started to sing a song from Frozen and they ramped up the volume until they were virtually screaming. DH called over the fence and asked them to go and sing inside.

Mayhem I'm very glad you are not my neighbour as you seem to see nothiing wrong with children making noise outside from 8am; decide that if it's not bad enough for environmental health to be able to enforce the law then that's all that matters; and seem to expect neighbours to speak to your children as if they're adults with adult reasoning, rather than children who sometimes just need to be told to do something in unequivocal terms.
You also seem to be one of those people who get up in arms if anyone says boo to your children, no matter what they're doing, and go around indignantly saying they've been bullied, offended whatever while at the same time treating your neighbours with contempt.

I think he could have dealt with it a bit better by asking them to sing quietly earlier - totally reasonable; to ask them to go inside at 9.40 is a bit unreasonable.

I won't let adults speak to my dc like crap just because they are bigger than them.

You may think it's ok to intimidate people based on the fact they are younger/smaller than you - I don't.

And thankfully nor do the people who I leave in the care of.

Their teachers talk to them with respect and so do other family members. In return my children are respectful - if you ask them politely to be quiet, they would be quiet. If you yell at them over a fence to get inside, they will come and tell me and then I will knock on your door and show you how an adult would deal with this situation.

On the hand, I would hate to be your child. Are they scared of you? Do you rule with fear?

Mayhem I do hope you are not directing your waiting/seriously comment at me. And frankly someone who describes anybody (surely not me too?) as a "cowardly cunt" over something as timelessly trivial as noisy children is hardly in a position to dispense any neighbourly/parenting/community advice whatsoever. But make your way to the nearest anger management clinic instead.

I am truly interested, not necessarily in the situation itself, but how given the OPs question, and all the responses (and I have more DH suggestions up my sleeve if so required) how it all pans out. If we will ever know. Geddit luv?

MsMilbanke

I'll update when I get a chance. The mum has a long commute to work and I don't see her very often. Not sure when the dad is around. It will be interesting to see what happens tomorrow morning.

Anger management because I called someone a cunt?

Are you easily shocked luv?

So much for 'it takes a village'.
I now understand how some people grow up so totally entitled and inconsiderate.

It is so entitled to want to play in your (albeit rented ) garden?

Or is it entitled to think everyone should be silent while you lay in your bed?

No Mayhem of course playing in your garden is not entitled. Allowing your children to make excessive noise and disturb other people, is.

Seriously unreasonable and slightly Scrooge like

Not unreasonable at all.

Thanks for the update OP -and yes it will be interesting - how the world moves round.

Yes Mayhem - cunt is a word that requires a little bit of explanation, maybe not for you as you possibly use it so often it's natural for you. Pray tell, dear lady mistress of all of us who so eskofarkingly need your enlightenment because we are so easily shocked....after all...who are the mere we when there is indeed you.
So little luvvie - who were you calling a cunt?
Simple question needing only a simple answer.

I'm off for some beauty sleep - as, like, really, I'm so cunting beautiful I don't even need it.

Why do you keep going on about size and someone being'bigger' than someone else mayhem. My mind is boggling at the crazy world you live in. Thankfully you aren't my neighbour. I know this, because they are reasonable people.

And if you are going to call someone a cunt, how charming, then you should own up to it. Saying someone else did it first blame them not me is frankly as childish as your arguments.

Crikey, are people really calling other people cunts for asking (note: asking not telling, let alone ordering) the neighbours kids to carry on their singing indoors after listening to it for an hour and a half on a Sunday?

Riiiight....

OP, I think your DH WNBU.

Blaming someone else?

recharging couldn't seem to follow the thread - so I explained the course of the conversation. I then wondered if she were going to be so kind to offer all anger management - I'm not sure where you get 'blaming' from?

I don't need to blame anyone - I am an adult, I can use the word cunt if I like. I feel no need to excuse it or blame someone else for it. I can own the fact I used it - fear not

And if you can't understand the whole bigger thing that's your issue - not mine.

Did the children quieten down or did they yell at you dh to "fuck off you miserable old cunt"

Not sure what bigger issue I've missed, but ok, shall leave it there as I've said what I think. Can't keep going over same ground. Might have to pop back if there is an OP update though

so Mayhem - you'll happily call a man who (and I'll quote from the OP again) 'called over the fence and asked them to go and sing inside' a cunt, yet you're wittering on about treating people with respect? Tell me, where is this yelling and disrespectful talk you're going on about? Because I can't see it anywhere. Except from the children who thought it was fine to sing at the tops of their voices for over an hour and a half early on a Sunday morning. Oh, and from you, of course. You really do sound a peach.

They were asked to sing inside. They could have stayed outside not singing.
I don't think DH was bu unless he spoke aggressively, which it doesn't sound like.

They were asked to sing inside. They could have stayed outside not singing.

An adult had directed them NOT to stay outside. How many DC do you know confident enough to ignore the orders of a busybody grownup?

can you explain why he's a busybody? He had been disturbed by loud singing (from the OP 'virtually screaming') for quite a long time. Do you consider anyone who challenges children's behaviour (or indeed anyone's behaviour) a busybody?

But also - why should the DC ignore him (and again, he didn't order, he asked). They had been very inconsiderate of their neighbours for a long time at an anti-social hour.

Jesus, if that had been my DD (though it wouldn't as we wouldn't have allowed her out in the garden at that hour on a Sunday), we would have been apologising to the neighbours, not bloody ignoring them or writing them off as cunts.