To think party mum should have checked before giving out inappropriate prizes

[SoonToBeSix]

Genuinely don't know if I am being unreasonable. I was at a birthday party today with three year old ds and he won musical bumps. He was swiftly handed a packet of haribo . I tried to encourage him to " save" them for later ie I would put them in by bag and through them away but he was so upset I let him have them.
I do not give my dc sweets ever with the exception of a small amount of chocolate at Easter from well meaning relatives. Most eggs get given away.
I really feel she should have checked first before handing them out.

I think rules of healthy eating are suspended for parties at all ages

Am now panic stricken. DD's first proper birthday party (she will be 3) is next weekend. I was all for shoving mini choc bars in the party bags.....am now thinking I should be supplying polenta cake or mung beans instead. Or raw carrots.

In fairness, DD doesn't have sweets but that's just because we're too busy eating cake to bother with them.

Mung beans

Everyone loves a mung bean...

It's interesting how unpleasant some of the responses on here are. The OP has been accused of being hysterical but it rather reads like the hysteria is around her trying to keep sweets out of her DC' s diet when he is young.

I had images of some stupid parent giving out condoms or nipple tassels at a party for 10 year olds.
YABU for thinking that haribo is inappropriate for 3 year olds at a party.

I'm quite surprised at the complete acceptance of sweets for 4 year olds here. I thought there'd be more voices against it.

My 3 didn't have sweets until they were 4 ish. They turned into perfectly normal kids and now they're perfectly normal teens and early 20s adults.

It didn't involve much effort or dramatics. I don't remember any ripping of sweets from their hands while they howled or anything. They were allowed chocolate, cake, a few crisps occasionally if they were offered it at other peoples houses. Sweets? No. If someone handed them a bag of sweets i'd take them off them. We're talking 3 year olds here. Basically used to eating what mummy says is fine.

My MIL thought i was some kind of monster because of it. In my mind i was doing a small thing towards the health of their adult teeth. (they weren't allowed fizzy drinks either - milk, water and very dilute juice was ok)

Once they got to 4/5 i let them eat more or less anything that was offered at other people's houses. Didn't want to make a fuss. They always reacted to 'goodies' as an enormous treat. It was nice to see that. But they never went mad for it. To this day i don't keep cake, choc, crisps and stuff routinely in the house. If they want it that badly they have to drive or walk up to the local shop for it and fetch me some as well but 9 times out of 10 they cant be arsed

*3 year olds

A friend's niece wasn't even allowed any fruit by her mother never mind sweets because she deemed fruit too full of sugar. Friend has an open fruit bowl policy with her two kids. When the niece was staying one night she got up early and gorged herself on the entire fruit bowl including 6 bananas .

It was a bit of a wake up call for the mother and she has realised that she was actually creating a massive problem instead of doing the best for her DD.

I'm in the everything in moderation camp.

ding, how about no more being hypocritical when deciding who gets to eat the treats in your house:

Db sent a solid choc rabbit from fab chocolatier in Berlin (ate that myself), my mother bought another rabbit (high quality choc - wasted on kids)

I know many strictly controlling parents who have no idea at all what their child is like when they are not there! The sensible child makes absolutely sure that the mother doesn't know. They just eat as much of the forbidden food as possible when they are able. I aimed for self discipline and it worked.

I remember on here a 2 yr old party with rice cakes, dried apricots and water!! The parents got nothing because obviously they were not going to want the same as the children and they couldn't be offered anything more appealing.

the whole POINT of a kids party is to cram them with sugar and fizz and wind them up to the point of melt down ...then send them home

a kids party with raisins and rice cakes and fizzy water - and no doubt no party bags of 'plastic tat' ...1000 kittens just died of sorrow

A party buffet of dried fruit and water? Gosh that child must have been really badly behaved that year

I bribed taught DD2 to crawl using a trail of jelly tots. She was a lazy little sod; it worked, no child can resist a jelly tot trail.

She's also a remarkably normal 16yo, and despite my blatant attempts to turn her into a sugar junkie, a very healthy water who will go for fruit as a first snack choice.

Rice cakes, dried apricots and water is only a small improvement on dried bread and water. Sounds utterly miserable.

To this day I don't keep cake, choc, crisps and stuff routinely in the house. If they want it that badly they have to drive or walk up to the local shop for it and fetch me some as well but 9 times out of 10 they cant be arsed

I do exactly the same, except DD2 can't drive yet, and DD1 is away at Uni. I figure the effort required to schlep down to the shops, a mile away, cancels out the sweet cravings.

Tea my ds is my third child, I have six he is not my pfb. I have a teenager she eats sweets, a sensible amount , she is also a size 6-8 bit thanks for your concern.

Thank you Outself .

Havnt read through but what about having a swap box for such occasions. I do it as my son has allergies and he gets to swop for a safe item ( and I get the haribo)

Unless someone has appointed you the European Commissioner for chocolate distribution

I'm aiming for Worldwide, actually

The was the hypocrisy of your eating a gift intended for your DCs, under the guise of minimising the amount of chocolate they eat.

YABU don't think it was totally inappropriate at a party. I remember when ds started school and kept coming out with sweets for various achievements, that was inappropriate. One day I said "don't eat that lolly (chewy drumstick) you might pull out your filling". He replied don't worry "it fell out last week". He had a filling due to teeth coming through damaged thanks to antibiotics.
Anyway I am a believer in not banning any foods (although I never allowed dc to have fizzy drinks). I ate sweets as a child and am not a big dessert person and can take or leave chocolate. Dh who had choc/sweets restricted as a child is addicted to snacks & friends who were not allowed as a child also have similar problems. But as you say your teenager is allowed sweets maybe YANBU?