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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bikinis on Toddlers...

220 replies

NiceCupOfTeaAndAPartyRing · 30/05/2014 14:54

AIBU to feel quite uncomfortable when I see young girls (5 and under) wearing bikinis? I'm not sure if I'm being a prude or not, just seems there seems to be more and more of them. I in no way am saying ridiculous things like they're a 'target' for creepy advances, and of course there are often girls completley starkers on the beach etc, but that's not sexualised, just totally natural.
Somehow I just find it odd that you would want your kid in anything sexualised at that age - But perhaps bikinis aren't seen as sexualising anymore??
I even saw a Virgin Holidays ad with one on. I really don't know! AIBU or do others feel a bit awkward about this too??

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 17:35

Because not all kids like to be half naked.

Dd2 was hardly ever dressed. My neighbours didn't recognise her with clothes on. She hit three and now doesn't like it.

Nothing we have done as she's always been free to run round in pants or a nappy.

squoosh · 30/05/2014 17:38

Bikinis on small children look all kinds of weird.

Bikinis on Toddlers...
OneLittleToddleTerror · 30/05/2014 17:38

hakunafrittata because little girls can be stubborn and only wears what she wants? My DD was in happy nappy until around 3. She started preschool and now she's only interested in girly and princess stuff. She won't wear anything not pink or sparkly. She will only wear dresses. She will wear both one or two pieces to swim but will not go into the water with just her bottoms. However she loves running naked at home.

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 17:42

MN may wish to create a weird genderless creature called toddler/small child, but your daughter does not.

This.

I don't understand the fuss about putting your little girl in pink dresses, nail polish, or any other sort of specifically "girl" items. There's nothing wrong with embracing femininity.

Women aren't second class citizens anymore and we shouldn't have to fit into a man's world by trying to be men with boobs, we should be making it an "everyone's" world where both traits are valued equally.

The default to "gender neutral" is masculinity. Why is wearing no shirt to cover up like little boys do the default?

Boys and girls are different. Not saying lets squeeze them into gender boxes. But to ignore that is just disingenuous.

Shenanagins · 30/05/2014 17:45

I don't think it is odd at all and not a new thing. There is a lovely picture of me in one on a Scottish beach in the 70's.

squoosh · 30/05/2014 17:47

'Women aren't second class citizens anymore and we shouldn't have to fit into a man's world by trying to be men with boobs'

Yawn.

I've never tried to do that thanks, I just think bikinis on toddlers are weird.

fingersonbuzzers · 30/05/2014 17:47

I used to think like this, but got absolutely fed up with wrestling my girls out of and back into wet swimming costumes in the middle of every single fecking swimming lesson

I bought DD2 a Sofia the first tankini and DD1 was so jealous I ended up getting here this she loves it, it's practical it's covered in disney crap we're all happy.

OneLittleToddleTerror · 30/05/2014 17:51

fingersonbuzzers omg, my DD would love to have either sofia the first or frozen on hers. She's a huge fan of both.

fingersonbuzzers · 30/05/2014 17:52

Go for the Sofia one, onelittletoddleterror - it was from Tesco and half the price of the disney store one Wink

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 17:55

Well said princess
My kids have always worn what they like (within reason ie practicalities of the occasion etc)

Just so happens they like pink and sparkly. But both have spent plenty of time in grey joggers or green t shirts and both have had "boys" shoes for reasons of fit and comfor and practicality.

They have never been denied things because they are aimed at boys. But they choose girly stuff. It's what they like.

Now my criteria for swim wear is cost, quality, fit and comfort. Now the bikinis in the link would be a no. Based on the fact they look tight and ill fitting and having to chase a toddler around re tying bits of string is not my idea of fun. But your regula crop top style or tankini is what I go for. Provided it fits.

Equally if they fell in love with some trunks they could have them and just wear a t shirt for added protection from the sun if need be.

But two pieces fit mine better because wedgies are uncomfortable!!

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 18:00

Yawn.

I've never tried to do that thanks, I just think bikinis on toddlers are weird.

Oh bless your precious little heart. You might want to re-examine why you think toddlers in a cute bikini are weird then.

squoosh · 30/05/2014 18:04

You think that's cute? Awwww, bless your precious bad taste.

squoosh · 30/05/2014 18:05

You might want to re-examine why you find it necessary to cover up non existent breasts.

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 18:09
  1. That's not how that phrase works.
  2. For the same reason I think girls should be able to wear dresses if they want. Because it's a cute feminine thing and girls should be allowed to wear girl things without having to default to the masculine gender neutral. I've already said this.
jacks365 · 30/05/2014 18:09

No one has said it is necessary but a lot of things people do or wear are not necessary. My dd has 3 sisters who do have something to hide so yes she would choose to wear a top too

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 18:09

Then why do we dress children at all? If not to cover up. They sure as hell don't need clothes on when it's warm. But who would walk their kid down the street naked or to the park.

Whys it different

Downamongtherednecks · 30/05/2014 18:11

I find bikinis on babies odd too. Bikini tops for women are to cover your breasts and provide support at least in my case so they are essentially bras. Why would you put a bra on a baby?

squoosh · 30/05/2014 18:12

'Then why do we dress children at all? If not to cover up. They sure as hell don't need clothes on when it's warm. But who would walk their kid down the street naked or to the park.'

It's different because they're on the beach. What does a three year old girl's body have that necessitates her wearing a top when a three year old boy doesn't?

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 18:14

Err perhaps because it's got her favourite Disney character on it and she wants to wear it??!!

As long as she's free to take it off if she wants which kids do, then no problem surely?

squoosh · 30/05/2014 18:14

'For the same reason I think girls should be able to wear dresses if they want. Because it's a cute feminine thing and girls should be allowed to wear girl things without having to default to the masculine gender neutral. I've already said this.'

Ummmm yes, most little girls wear dresses, not exactly revolutionary thinking there. It's nothing to do with defaulting to 'the masculine gender'. What a strange thing to say, it's realising that a small child does not need to cover her chest.

Surely even you can see that?

squoosh · 30/05/2014 18:16

'As long as she's free to take it off if she wants which kids do, then no problem surely?'

Nope, no problem at all. It's parents who insist on covering a small girl's chest who are weird.

KellyElly · 30/05/2014 18:16

Little triangle tops or string pants look like you are trying to make your child look like a mini adult and is just gross. Tankinis are a whole different ball game and totally appropriate.

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 18:17

To spin this on its head, why aren't baby boys in dresses? Practically speaking, it's easier to lift a skirt to change a nappy than it is to pull down pants, take them off, then put them back on.

slithytove · 30/05/2014 18:21

Even when baby girls are in dresses it's not just a nappy underneath, it's a vest / pants / tights too isn't it?

not sure will find out in September

fingersonbuzzers · 30/05/2014 18:22

Surely you insist on covering a little girls chest when you put them in a one piece too Confused