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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bikinis on Toddlers...

220 replies

NiceCupOfTeaAndAPartyRing · 30/05/2014 14:54

AIBU to feel quite uncomfortable when I see young girls (5 and under) wearing bikinis? I'm not sure if I'm being a prude or not, just seems there seems to be more and more of them. I in no way am saying ridiculous things like they're a 'target' for creepy advances, and of course there are often girls completley starkers on the beach etc, but that's not sexualised, just totally natural.
Somehow I just find it odd that you would want your kid in anything sexualised at that age - But perhaps bikinis aren't seen as sexualising anymore??
I even saw a Virgin Holidays ad with one on. I really don't know! AIBU or do others feel a bit awkward about this too??

OP posts:
Original poster
NiceCupOfTeaAndAPartyRing · 30/05/2014 15:23

PrincessBabyCat That's a great point.
That second one is god awful. (But then I'd think that on an adult too ;) )

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 15:23

What's the point in shoes on a baby?

Or head bands?
Or half the things people put kids in these days.

That's just what the parents choose as they like it. They don't do it to sexualise their child.

MILfreetoagoodhome · 30/05/2014 15:24

they are so wrong on so many level YANBU op i prefer a swimsuit or a UV suit any day sloppy parenting putting your DD in a freaking BIKINI ?? so so wrong why cover something they don't possess ? and so much skin on show in hot weather is a disaster waiting to happen even with sunscreen.
i dont even wear a bikini and im 20 i find them gross and rude i wear a short wetsuit when i go to the leisure centre or the beach. also don't get why the single mums with neck and tramp stamps feel the need to wear 3 bits of string when taking their children to the leisure centre its a swimming pool not tenerife ffs.

Nishky · 30/05/2014 15:24

No it isn't a natural association to make with little girls. This comes up every year on mumsnet- in my view the problem is in the eye of the beholder.

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 15:27

Also kids are all different sizes and shapes and some develope really early.

They may need an age five as they are slim and short but in fact be older and developing more. So an 8/9/10 year old may not wear an age matching set but need te top half.

So you couldn't justbbring out bottoms and no too for the smaller sizes.

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 15:27

And no top

SaucyJack · 30/05/2014 15:29

I think they look far dodgier on older girls tbh. My oldest is starting to get a "womanly" curve to her shape, and there's no way I'd be drawing attention to it with a bikini.

Little fat babies and toddlers just look like babies in whatever they wear. I don't find it possible to sexualise a two-year-old in my eyes.

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 15:30

The bikini top indicates there is something behind the triangles that needs covering - just as teenagers/women wear the top to cover their breasts. It's natural people are going to make this association when they see little girls wearing bikini tops.

Girls are covering their tops from almost day one. You don't see little girls running around topless like you do little boys past age 2 or 3.

If people are thinking of boobs on children, they're probably a pedo and don't belong in the pool in the first place.

Instead of teaching our daughters to dress modestly, lets teach our sons respect for woman's bodies.

OwlCapone · 30/05/2014 15:30

Why would you put a bra on a baby?

I wouldn't. That why I don't. I do let her wear a bikini though.

OwlCapone · 30/05/2014 15:32

The bikini top indicates there is something behind the triangles that needs covering - just as teenagers/women wear the top to cover their breasts. It's natural people are going to make this association when they see little girls wearing bikini tops.

I don't make that assumption.

If you think "breasts" when you see a little girl in a bikini top, I think it says more about you than anything else.

PrincessBabyCat · 30/05/2014 15:32

i dont even wear a bikini and im 20 i find them gross and rude i wear a short wetsuit when i go to the leisure centre or the beach. also don't get why the single mums with neck and tramp stamps feel the need to wear 3 bits of string when taking their children to the leisure centre its a swimming pool not tenerife ffs.

I love bikinis, and I will continue to take my tattooed bikinid ass out to the pool so DD can play in the water. Grin

Nishky · 30/05/2014 15:32

I agree with you about the toddlers just looking cute saucyjack

And I agree with everything princessbabycat put - said it much better than I could

Nishky · 30/05/2014 15:34

And owl

RiverTam · 30/05/2014 15:35

if I was potty training I would just use the bikini pants bit, no need for a top half at that age.

If we're not talking about potty training then I agree, I don't like them, but I don't like little ones dressed older than they are anyway (but I am old and old-fashioned, I fear!).

Each to their own, of course, but DD won't be getting a bikini until she's a bit closer to having something to put in it!

merce · 30/05/2014 15:35

YANBU. I think it's awful. Sexualisation of extremely young children is a really worrying trend. My MIL bought my 6 year old DD some 'high heels' recently (which obviously DD was delighted with). Had to do some sneaky 'losing' of them. Really just WRONG on so many levels in my view.

OwlCapone · 30/05/2014 15:36

If I see a small girl in a bikini I think "there's a small girl". That's it. No thought as to her swimwear.

OwlCapone · 30/05/2014 15:37

Sexualisation of extremely young children is a really worrying trend

Yes! but a bikini isn't.

For a start, it's hardly a "trend"

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 15:37

What would people think if a 2/3 yr old was running around naked?

Is that more or less inappropriate than two piece swim wear?

Writerwannabe83 · 30/05/2014 15:39

Definitely less!!!

Oldraver · 30/05/2014 15:40

When you see a baby/toddler/young child in a bikini the only thought should be how cute or not

Any thought of sexualized clothing says so much about YOU

Sleepyfergus · 30/05/2014 15:40

YANBU. I personally dislike bikinis on little girls, it just 'seems' wrong. My 2 girls will be in a swimsuit (5years) and a UV suit (2years). Each to their own but it just doesn't feel right to me.

Canshopwillshop · 30/05/2014 15:41

Not keen on this either. I also worry about young children being too exposed to the sun. My 2 always wore uv suits until they were about 5. DD is now 9 and owns a couple of bikinis. However they are of the bandeau style top/boy pant bottom variety not the itsy bitsy triangle type.

RiverTam · 30/05/2014 15:41

I can't give any good reason but yes, I would prefer to see a naked toddler than one in a bikini. Not that my preference counts for anything, of course Grin. I don't like fingernail varnish on little ones either, again with no good rational explanation - just don't like it!

I don't agree with the PP who said that you don't see 2 or 3 year old girls running around with no top on - I see that quite often, especially when impromptu water play is going on. DD was in the Princess Di paddling pool thingy earlier this year just in her pants as we weren't expecting to go there, she's 4 and she wasn't the only one.

OwlCapone · 30/05/2014 15:43

That depends whether you are talking about the beach or a shopping centre Wink

On a beach, it is no more or less inappropriate than any swimwear choice.

Gileswithachainsaw · 30/05/2014 15:44

Dd has a tankini. Shes 7

Swimsuits don't always fit right as she is slim and long in the body so swim suits that are long enough are too baggy and ones that aren't baggy at the top are up short and ride up her butt.

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