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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to not have 'guest' sanitary protection in bathroom?

999 replies

EasyCube · 29/05/2014 18:16

Long story short, a relatively new friend and teenage daughter visited I later received a text

'Thank you for having us, unfortunately you have caused xxx embarrassment as she could not find the guest tampons and had to come home with toilet paper in her underwear'

Confused

Is this a thing? I have never once thought before that I should have pads/tampons in the bathroom, easily accessed by guests

My mum was great and I loved her a lot but we never talked about periods (I bought my own stuff from pocket money/paper round money) and now I'm wondering if this is just another thing I was never told about and feel a bit stupid to be honest Sad

Does everyone else have things available in the bathroom for guests? I'm thinking about other bathrooms I've been in and can't say I've noticed this before?

OP posts:
CharityCase · 30/05/2014 03:43

I actually do keep the tampax in a drawer next to the loo and human nature being as it is, I would expect someone caught short to have a quick rifle through the drawers rather than ask, especially if, say, it was mid- dinner party. I would not be at all offended if someone took a couple without asking. However, there's certainly no obligation to provide. The mum is crazy.

misanthropologist · 30/05/2014 03:55

Our downstairs loo (the one guests usually end up in) has a small cabinet with a glass front panel within arm's reach of the toilet. The top shelf has extra bottles of shampoo, lotion, conditioner, extra bars of soap and a box each of tampons/pads as I hate to be caught up short. The bottom shelf is stuffed with spare loo rolls and boxes of tissues. I certainly wouldn't think twice if anyone other than me used them (DD is 15 so there are teenaged girls in and out of here constantly) but they're not specifically The Guest Sanpro.

LibraryMum8 · 30/05/2014 04:20

OP YANBU! I went through menopause early and there hasn't been sanpro in this house for ten years! I have no intention of getting any either as I don't have dd's and see no need for it!

I do have a bin in every loo and bedroom...I would not ever consider Not having one...BUT I must say as a teen our dog got into the loo and would steal pads used pads and chew on them!! Horrible!

mathanxiety · 30/05/2014 04:41

I would see it as just as much of an obligation as a clean enough hand towel, soap, toilet paper, and running water. While these are provided for men and boys too, I think it needs to be acknowledged that visiting women and girls have the additional need of sanpro. Doesn't have to be anything fancy. Everyone can get by with a pad until they get home to their weapon of choice.

I expect boys and men to put the seat down and expect bathroom users of both sexes to spray a bit of air freshener (provided and left out and visible) if they really stink up the bathroom, and replace the old loo roll with a new roll if they finish the old one -- in return I provide what both sexes might need and for women and girls that means sanpro.

GardeningPerchance · 30/05/2014 04:52

I keep my stuff in the bathroom so it would be there if needed and wouldn't mind at all if someone caught short took some, but there is no expectation to provide that I know of! What if you visit the home of one of the many people out there that are not menstruaters???!

redcaryellowcar · 30/05/2014 05:03

i haven't read all (18 pages of) responses, but too think your friend is rude, if she had asked at the time, you could have tried to help out, but i do think that its up to people to provide their own.
if providing guests tampons and towels is the done thing perhaps overnight guests should have a 'penis beaker' left on the bedside cabinet, you could provide a short note if explanation and summarise 'for your comfort' its a whole new level of hospitality!

DesertRose1958 · 30/05/2014 06:43

Coruskate :) Comfort items as in a whole range of things like pads and tampons, disposal bags, tooth floss, hand cream, wet wipes, mini toiletries just because, perfume - a squirt of that into the air can be preferable for getting rid of lingering smells instead of a squirt of air fresh which is kind of advertising you're a smelly bum to the person next into the loo.

And in the everyday loo thats used by everyone.

DesertRose1958 · 30/05/2014 06:47

sorry - not just the loo a visitor might use if there's an extra loo for them to use.

I love my baskets :D

Revengeofthechocolatebunny · 30/05/2014 07:29

There is obviously a niche in the market for sanpro cakes.

Like a Nappy Cake but a tasteful basket with a menstrual candle in the centre, circled by tampons standing on end and pads stacked around that. A couple of packs of wipes and disposal bags tucked in and a pretty ribbon.

Ideal gift for any girl on the event of her first period. Also would be a useful addition for any guest bathroom. Ribbons could be bathroom colour coordinated.

ViviPru · 30/05/2014 07:32

How long has 'sanpro' been a broadly used term outside of supermarket merch departments? Confused

nooka · 30/05/2014 07:42

Our two bathrooms both have pads in the cupboard, but only the brands dd and I use, and if they have run out in between our periods then there won't be any. I don't regard pads/tampons/other products as the same as loo paper, they are things you buy for your own personal comfort (for example I hate tampons, but my sister only wears them, if I visit her house and my period unexpectedly starts I don't demand that she gets some pads in, where I might complain if she'd run out of loo paper, and in any case I have quite specific requirements).

I've never stayed in a hotel that provided any supplies at all. If I visit someone and they have little baskets with loads of fancy stuff in them I just think that they are the sort of person who likes arranging fancy stuff. I doubt I'd actually use any of it. If I forget something like a toothbrush I think that's my mistake not their failing if they don't have supplies 'just in case'.

HerrenaHarridan · 30/05/2014 07:43

I am surprised by all these responses.

I always have a little stash of spare towels and tampons. Carefully placed so that if you were looking for them you would see them.

I have always done this. Even through 10 years of using a mooncup.

Not everyone is regular for lots of reasons

nooka · 30/05/2014 07:56

Our stuff in in the cupboard and I'd not care if someone borrowed them, but really what's the issue with asking? I like my surfaces to be uncluttered because it's more work to clean with loads of junk everywhere (talking to you dd!) The only people I've ever visited with a 'guest' bathroom (ie not generally used by everyone in the house) was my very posh grandmother, otherwise it's the family bathroom or loo and they keep their stuff wherever they feel like it. I'd not rummage around, I think that's very rude. No problem with having little baskets etc, but daft to expect it.

DesertRose1958 · 30/05/2014 07:57

Nooka having a basket of supplies in the loo for guests to use is no sign at all that the person who put them there enjoys arranging fancy stuff. I actually prefer a clear and uncluttered minimalist look and apart from my loos there isn't a basket of stuff anywhere else in the house.

For me, making people comfortable in my home means amongst other things knowing that if they go to the loo they will be comfortable and find what they just might need on the off chance.

You mentioned hotel bathrooms - so yes, very similar to the bathroom in a very good hotel but in a home.

Revengeofthechocolatebunny · 30/05/2014 08:00

I keep mine in the downstairs loo cupboard. I always carry some in my bag too. DD once decided she knew best when I asked if she had enough when she was going to school one day and learned the hard way that it's better to have too many than not have any.

School offices only stock supermarket cheap ones. Toilet paper might be more absorbent!

DamnBamboo · 30/05/2014 08:01

Madness.
What keeping a spare in your purse/handbag/pocket etc..

DamnBamboo · 30/05/2014 08:01

What about keeping ...

Bowlersarm · 30/05/2014 08:01

Never occurred to me to supply guest sanitary pads/tampons, and won't be starting anytime soon. Sometimes I leave them out if I can't be bothered to put them away and would be very happy if someone used one who needed to, or asked me if I had some. When my periods stop I won't be stocking up on them for guests though.

Yanbu. Bizarre and rude friend you have there.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 30/05/2014 08:13

We have very few female visitors of menstruating age, I have friends for coffee once every few weeks for a couple of hours and that's it. All other regular female visitors are under 10 or over 70, overnight guests only happen a couple of times a year, so no need at the moment and I wouldn't mind if they helped themselves to mine from the cupboard. Any other supplies would just gather dust. Plus our only bathroom is tiny.

LightastheBreeze · 30/05/2014 08:14

Maybe we should be able to buy selection boxes of guest pads and tampons with a variety, in of all sizes to keep in our guest toilets.

Haven't had the need for all this stuff for a long time - I'm old so better seek them out Grin

slithytove · 30/05/2014 08:17

For those of you who are an advocate of the guest sanpro Grin

Should single blokes who don't have dd provide the same?

I've never gone to my bachelor uncles house expecting to find a beautiful selection box of sanpro at my disposal.

misanthropologist · 30/05/2014 08:19

My Mum hasn't had a period in a good fifteen years, but she still keeps some on-hand for me and, eventually, DD when we visit her. I was there a couple weekends ago, we were into the wine and wound up having a good laugh about how we both intend to keep pads round pretty much forever just in case we get the, as she put it, 'old-lady dribbles'.

DesertRose1958 · 30/05/2014 08:20

Light if you are as old as me and your eyesight is anything like mine you won't be able to see the packs on the shelves they are so small nowadays. Gone are the days of walking around with something the size of a bolster in your waist high period pants.

Ragwort · 30/05/2014 08:27

Desert - that made me laugh, remember those old fashioned sanitary belts we had to wear & the pads had loops Grin.

And the incinerators in the school toilets - yuk, the smell Grin.

Pipbin · 30/05/2014 08:35

I've just remembered that my mum has guest sanpro in the guest bedroom.
She has a little basket of stuff on the dressing table with stuff she's nicked from hotels sample sizes of hand cream, soap, sewing kits, painkillers and sanpro.