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AIBU?

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Original poster

Totally freaked out over DD friend ( sensitive)

109 replies

ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 21:56

When I was pregnant with DD I lost her twin. I was around 9 weeks when I was bleeding heavy and passing clots and by the time I could have a scan it showed an empty sac. However I blocked this out for years as I was focused on the screen until they said we found a heartbeat.

That's the back story.

Dd now has a friend, He is her best friend and I have seen her sat talking to him. This has been going on for a while. However tonight she said Oliver ( which I picked for a boys name) was in mummy tummy with her.

I have never believed in spirits or ghost or anything like this, but this has freaked me out.

Could DD be right.

OP posts:
Ratbagcatbag · 24/05/2014 21:59

Have you mentioned the lost twin to her before? I used to still do weave elaborate plots into my life that would vaguely start as a true story.

Clobbered · 24/05/2014 22:00

Does DD know about her lost twin? You don't say how old she is. No reason to freak out. She may have some dim sense of having had a twin and feels very close to her new friend, and this is how she expresses her feelings for him. I presume she will have heard about or met other twins by now as well?

NurseRoscoe · 24/05/2014 22:00

Have you told her about her twin or spoke about it around her? It's amazing what kids will pick up on even when you think they aren't listening

NurseRoscoe · 24/05/2014 22:00

Have you told her about her twin or spoke about it around her? It's amazing what kids will pick up on even when you think they aren't listening

Eebahgum · 24/05/2014 22:00

I'm not really into woo but I'm open minded - would you feel better or worse if you told yourself it was true? How old is dd by the way? Does she know anything about her brother?

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 24/05/2014 22:01

I dont get it? Who said about Oliver? her or her friend?

Original poster
ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 22:02

She is almost 5 and have never told her.

OP posts:
paddyclampo · 24/05/2014 22:02

My mum lost a baby girl before I was born, between my 2 older brothers. I used to talk about being able to see a girl a couple of years older than me. I used to talk to her and she used to sit in my buggy, even though she was older than me. I used to scream if my mum tried to sit me in it because she was in it! I told my mum that the girl told me "It wasn't fair".

It definitely used to freak my mum out. I think there's something in it!

Original poster
ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 22:03

Oliver is her imaginary friend

OP posts:
stripedtortoise · 24/05/2014 22:03

Sorry, is Oliver an imaginary friend?

I can't see where you've mentioned that. Spooky if so!

annebullin · 24/05/2014 22:03

Could she have overheard you talking with dh?

WorraLiberty · 24/05/2014 22:04

Sorry to hear that OP

It's quite likely she's overheard something at home, even if you were totally unaware of her being their/awake etc.

Or she has school friends that are twins.

stripedtortoise · 24/05/2014 22:04

Ah just seen.
That is spooky. I don't generally believe in this kinda thing but that would freak me out.

WorraLiberty · 24/05/2014 22:04

*there

hippo123 · 24/05/2014 22:05

I wouldn't see it as spooky, more comforting.

Original poster
ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 22:05

We have never talked about it. When I have talked about it with my mum as it's only recently I have thought about it, she has been in school.

OP posts:
Eebahgum · 24/05/2014 22:07

Ah, Oliver is an imaginary friend! Still think you need to focus on what this means for you though - would it give you comfort or freak you out if it were true? You have no way of ever knowing for sure. Maybe you should just believe in the answer which gives you most comfort.

VitoCorleone · 24/05/2014 22:08

Ok not weird at all - until you mention that her friend is actually an imaginary friend (could you not have said that in the OP?)

But yes, that would freak me out too

Tangerinefairy · 24/05/2014 22:08

Wow, I actually do believe in some things like this. I agree with Eebahgum though, good advice there.

WorraLiberty · 24/05/2014 22:10

I'd still bet every penny I've got that at some point (which you've probably forgotten) someone mentioned it in front of her.

Or it could be a story she's heard at school/set of twins at school and one is called Oliver.

Original poster
ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 22:11

I don't know at the moment, for the last few weeks I have thought someone was behind me looked around and nobody was there. I do suffer from anxiety but I now am over thinking that.

OP posts:
Original poster
ICanSeeTheSun · 24/05/2014 22:13

Worral, I am a rational person and I hope that is true but I can't go asking every parent down the school. At least that sound logical.

OP posts:
VitoCorleone · 24/05/2014 22:15

Hey if it brings you some comfort then don't worry, i understand why you'd be freaked out, but if she hadn't heard this from you or anyone else then its really nice that she still has that connection.

WorraLiberty · 24/05/2014 22:15

You don't need to ask every parent at the school

You just need to either put it down to

She overheard and you are unaware
There is a set of twins at school you are unaware of
She read a story at school
There's something spooky happening

As it could be any of the above, just pick whatever comforts you most.

Icimoi · 24/05/2014 22:16

She will know about twins because she will have come across them at school or nursery and there will have been some discussion about how they came to be twins. This really is no big deal.