To wonder how many of you not on the organ donor register

[Normalisavariantofcrazy]

Would be happy to accept an organ on behalf of yourself or a relative?

If you are, excluding health reasons, why are you not on the organ donor register? Is it just a case of not getting round to it, if so

register here

Been signed up for as long as I can remember. DC too. Why on earth wouldn't we tbh, they're no fucking use to me/us when we've carked it, and I wouldn't hesitate with my children if it meant saving another family from pain I couldn't possibly imagine at this moment. My family are fully aware of my wishes, as am I of theirs (same as mine).

There are several different threads of argument but I still don't understand why anyone is against the opt out system......

You have total control of removing yourself from the list.....but if you are not bothered either way or don't want to tempt fate then at least some good may come out of the situation. With an opt out system you still have the choice not to donate.

Most online forms and terms and conditions today assume consent (to sell data, contact you about related offers etc) unless you opt out, I appreciate that feelings about donation are more serious but in that case you can opt out of donating.

In reply to the people talking about not being suitable, things are changing rapidly. I was put on the recipient list a month ago and they were talking about "marginal organs", these are organs that they would not give to a young otherwise fit person but that may give an 80 year old several years and a better quality of life.

The increased use of marginal organs and advances in using previously unusable organs -

(www.kidneyresearchuk.org/health-information/case-studies/deborah-bakewell)

means that even people who were not considered suitable 6 months ago may be now.

If you are interested there is a petition to get the opt out system debated by the government.

epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/59850

and also about education in schools and the use of organs from children under two months. A young boy died earlier this week due to a lack of infant organs meaning he could not receive a heart small enough for his body

epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/54567

epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/62560

Shaking - so sorry for your losses.

Most of my family are against organ donation. The subject was mentioned a few weeks ago after dh had put himself on the organ donation register. My DM asked him "what if one of your organs goes to somebody horrible?" And he replied that he didnt care who got them, even if the person was only 1% good it would be worth it to save somebody's life.

I am on the list and have been for years.

I don't think the implications of organ donation should be underestimated though and I am VERY pro.

My friend made the decision to allow her dad's organs to be donated.
It does impact on those last hours with your loved one.

People should be fully aware of everything involved.

I don't have time for the 'ewwww I don't like the idea' type of objection.

But it is a big deal and people are allowed to have reservations.

Why base your decision on people who may not even be around when the time comes. Either it's your body or it's not,

It won't be my body when I am dead. My body will belong to my next of kin. My next of kin will not want to donate my organs. Wether people feel I have succumbed to my husbands wishes is irrelevant because he could override my decision when I die anyway as could any of our next of kins who decide that they don't want our organs donated when we are dead.

It is huge deal and an ethical dilemma.

People who do not agree with organ donation for whatever reason should of course not be criticised for this. But they should be out of the system altogether.
It's a system that relies on altruism. Give and take. I don't think it's right to be willing to take, but not give.
I think we should have an opt-out system that records your wish with regards to participation on both sides. You can opt out of donating but you are also opting out of receiving.
Children should not be included in this as they cannot make their own decisions. They should be able to receive regardless.
Those who 'cannot' donate for medical reasons should still be opted into the system, if they wish to receive. Everyone's organs are checked for suitability any way. Let the medics decide if they can use them or not, it's not your call.

It's a system that relies on altruism. Give and take. I don't think it's right to be willing to take, but not give.
I think we should have an opt-out system that records your wish with regards to participation on both sides. You can opt out of donating but you are also opting out of receiving.

How would you prevent people from opting in just so that they are eligible to have a donor organ but actually have no intention of donating themselves? They could never override the families refusal to consent, so how would this system work?

Do they anaethestise you when they remove your organs? I worry about the people who are pronounced brain dead but aren't really (I know it's rare). What if you weren't dead but couldn't speak and they took your organs out? I know that sounds REALLY fucking stupid btw but it is a secret fear of mine.

Why would I put my family through additional pain of seeing my body cut up and parts removed when it isn't what they want?

This argument is irrelevant.

The only people who would see the body cut up and parts removed would be the surgeons, the medical staff supporting them, and the undertakers preparing your body. Even if you are of a religion or ethnic group that views the body during the funereal rites, you only ever see the head and hands.

I have always been against the opt-out system, as I believe that my rights to my own body are paramount and should not be handed over to the state. But it never occurred to me that I do not own my body after I die! Of course, as with the rest of my 'property' that I leave behind, my next of kin would surely own my remains.

I'm not entirely certain that I would accept a transplant, but I am on the register because I could save a life and its not up to me to deny that chance to someone who is willing to take it.

^Why would I put my family through additional pain of seeing my body cut up and parts removed when it isn't what they want? I think they would already be suffering enough without having to make decisions that would add to their pain.
4in 10 families of donor cards don't agree to donation after their loved ones death. My family is not unique.^

Out of interest what do you think a post mortem is? Your body is likely to be cut up in the event of your death whether you give your organs or not. And your family won't see it ffs.

No, it's no unique that so many people have the same attitude. it's unfortunate but not unique.

Do they anaethestise you when they remove your organs? I worry about the people who are pronounced brain dead but aren't really (I know it's rare). What if you weren't dead but couldn't speak and they took your organs out? I know that sounds REALLY fucking stupid btw but it is a secret fear of mine.

Brain stem dead and persistent vegetative state are two separate things bauhausfan so your secret fear scenario couldn't happen. Hopefully this will help:

www.nhs.uk/conditions/brain-death/Pages/Introduction.aspx

They do anaethetise the donor, and it is done with the utmost care and respect

the argument that people shouldn't be allowed to receive if they don't donate is completely pointless and would be completely unworkable. Plus it would open up potential for this to be extended elsewhere, e.g. if you don't donate blood should you not be allowed a transfusion? bone marrow? if you're not prepared to donate your eggs to an infertile couple perhaps you shouldn't receive IVF on the nhs? Where does it end?

Reallity is that many people don't think about organ donation until they are in a position that they might need to be a recipient. So if you have a system where everyone should be on the register and someone just hasn't got round to it yet and then ends up in a place where they need a donor organ should they be excluded?

It's ridiculous.

I think that organ donation is fantait is personal choice and nobody should be judged for not wanting to donate theirs or e.g. their children's organs. I honestly can't say that I would want to donate ds' organs if it came to that.stic and as I said I am on the register. But

oops computer fail - I think organ donation is fantastic and as I say I am on the register. but it is personal choice...

I think anyone who needs an organ should receive one, regardless of who they are, what kind of life they've led or what their stance on organ donation is.

As people keep saying, what happens to our bodies after we're dead won't make a happ'orth of difference to us, the dead ones, so we're not going to know or care whether the recipient of our organs is Mother Theresa or Fred West.

A gift given with conditions is no gift at all.

I still don't understand why anyone is against the opt out system

Principle: The right to bodily autonomy should be sacrosanct, not granted upon request. Consent for medical procedures must be sought (where possible), not assumed. I am fully in favour of organ donation and would encourage anyone and everyone to register. However, if they fail to make any notification of their wishes (either way), I think it's ethically safer to work on the basis that they didn't want to donate instead of wondering whether they got round to opting out/understood what it all meant/etc. Which leads me on to....

Practical issues: Instituting an opt-out system would be a bit of an administrative nightmare (if it were done in a way I think proper). Essentially, I would want to make sure that every single person falling under the system knew exactly what they were being signed up for/opting-out of, and that means communication with every person in this country, in every language necessary, through every letterbox/TV screen/public display/whatever. In which case, why not just promote the opt-in system?

I think the opt-in system is "safer". If you make the incorrect decision - fail to take a donation where it was the deceased wish to do so - nobody going to prison. With an opt-out system, the mistake made would be to take organs against someone's wishes, with no way of proving that they were fully informed about their apparent consent to donate.

Of course it's completely unworkable, but that doesn't make those who refuse to donate yet happily accept any less selfish/hypocritical.

I said a few years ago that I intended to go on the register. Then-H said there was no point as he would not consent to have my organs used. He said he would have me stuffed and kept in the living room instead, which he thought was hilarious

After we divorced I went on the register, mainly for the reasons I had intended to in the first place but also, far less worthily, with "up yours XH" as a tiny bonus. I have told the DC that by using me to help someone else live they will in some sense be helping me to live on after I would otherwise be dead and gone. Which is quite nice, not sure if I believe it exactly (after all I'm not going to know ) but hope it is comforting for them.

and it is done with the utmost care and respect

Except it isn't, at least not always.

When my DC's bio parents were in an accident that resulted in brain stem death, both families made the decision to abide by the wishes of the people in question and consent to donation. Any respect ended with the signatures (the care was never there in the first place), beyond that point the families became nothing more than an inconvenience. Incautious words and a lack of decorum resulted in DS (who was injured at the time) witnessing far too much that he really shouldn't have.

The result is that he now believes that organ donors are treated with less regard than a car being stripped for spare parts, he's too badly affected to listen to explanations that what he saw and heard that day was a monumental screw up...not the norm. DH (who gave consent for his sister's organs to be used on behalf of the family) now lives with the conflicting emotions of relief at knowing his DSis didn't die for nothing, and guilt that the decision has made a bad situation incalculably worse for DS.

We both hope that in time he will come to see the good that was done, but right now he's not seeing it.

My husband, my two sons and myself are currently being matched to donate a kidney to my ds.
If you can do it alive I'm damn sure you can do it when you're dead!

andro that sounds horrendous.
No wonder people get put off with stories like that.
Maybe it's time to look at procedures and policy which would encourage rather than put off potential donors.

Ledkr

Ledkr - There were a lot of horrified people when the subsequent complaint went in, I'd be shocked if that particular hospital ever messed up like that again!

I hope your ds gets a match soon.

I'm on it, give blood and am on the bone marrow donor register.

I wouldn't hesitate to accept for me or my family, so think it is only right that we would give another family the same chance.