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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think this is a bit wtf ??

179 replies

motherofmonster · 16/05/2014 14:02

Have had lunch with my friend today and was telling her that i had managed to get a week in the summer hols for me and ds at a caravan.
She asked how big it was (3 bed) and straight away launched into how it was too big for just the two of us and that wouldnt it be great if her and her 4dc came with us as we would have the spare room.
Now i know that this point it is not unreasonable, but quick as a flash she said how great it would be for the kids to have a holiday as she couldnt afford to take them.
I stupidly then said ' well it would work out cheaper if we split the cost i suppose and the kids would have fun ect' that was that.
Ive got home and she has sent me a text saying how she is gutted that she has been asked to pay as after all i have already booked and paid and it wouldnt cost me anything as after all there is room to spare, so she doesnt see what difference it will make her not paying, and that i am being very selfish.

Guess i was just a bit gobsmacked, so aibu?? just didnt see it coming to be honest. i suppose it wouldnt cost much more, just the extra bed linin ect.

OP posts:
drivenbyyou · 16/05/2014 16:07

She wouldn't be able to go anyway - any time I've booked a caravan I've had to specify the number of people using that caravan. The confirmation has always had the number of adults/children that are going. I'm assuming it's been confirmed.

So that's it - you can't add anyone unless they pay extra Wink or you can't add anyone at all. What a bloody cheek.

YouTheCat · 16/05/2014 16:08

Have you told her to fuck right off yet?

Plomino · 16/05/2014 16:11

Bloody hell ! Does she add her weeks shopping onto the person in front' s at the checkout queue too ? Seeing as they're already there and all ? Gobsmacked at the sheer front of her !

erin99 · 16/05/2014 16:23

I'm another in the camp of "don't make up an excuse". She'll think a way round it and you'll have to think up an even more convoluted excuse, plus you run the risk that she takes you for a complete mug and tries again next year. Breezy but firm.

Andrewofgg · 16/05/2014 16:25

She obviously likes sex and travel. Tell her to fuck off.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 16/05/2014 16:25

Ye gods and little fishes! What a cheeky cow! No, she absolutely may NOT freeload off your holiday. You are soooo NBU.

Please do tell her to fuck off in the least polite terms.

saintlyjimjams · 16/05/2014 16:28

God no just no. Just tell her you've been thinking you don't want extra people there, the offer is no more. And do not be persuaded otherwise!

HecatePropylaea · 16/05/2014 16:31

Be assertive.
you will just be miserable if you aren't and you let her walk all over you. You'll feel bad about yourself and it will spoil your holiday.

OnlyLovers · 16/05/2014 16:34

Christ, she's got a nerve! I wouldn't tell her you were downsizing, just text her back and say 'If you can't pay your way don't come'.

Doesn't sound like much of a friend to me, tbh.

UrethraFranklin · 16/05/2014 16:34

Hope she doesn't know the caravan park you're going to, she could drop in for a visit Wink

MrFMercury · 16/05/2014 16:35

Just tell her that if that is her opinion of you then maybe you shouldn't socialise anymore at all. What do you actually get out of this friendship other than her trying to bully you?

Solo · 16/05/2014 16:56

Rude woman! YANBU!!!
My friend asked me to join her in a rented seafront house. She didn't talk about money. I paid anyway! who in their right mind would expect it for nothing?!
Tell her no and cross her off your Christmas card list.

rookiemater · 16/05/2014 17:02

You've had a lucky break OP. Now you can text back with a clear conscience and tell her where to go. This is one of those occasions where "I'm sorry you feel that way." comes in handy. Actually in her case I'd be a bit more specific and say well actually you'd prefer it was just you and DS anyway.

Finola1step · 16/05/2014 17:05

Another one adding to the she's a cheeky mare / don't make excuses list.

Just a thought.. Where did she think all her lot would sleep? There's only one spare bedroom. Oh I get it. Your ds can go in with you, leaving 2 bedrooms for her and her lot. For free! She is bang out of order.

Just tell her that you didn't think it through properly, you have now and have decided to go back to your original plan of just you and your ds. No more needed.

5Foot5 · 16/05/2014 17:06

Yup another one here in the "don't lie" camp. This cheeky cow clearly has form for free-loading and will continue to try to do so unless you show her you are not an easy mark.

"I have thought about it and it will be too crowded with 5 extra so just me and DS going. But seriously? Did you honestly expect to go for free!!!!!!!"

UriGeller · 16/05/2014 17:07

You don't need to tell her you've downsized or anything. It might come out as a lie.

Just text her back with, "yep, probably for the best we keep things as originally planned then. Xx"

NigellasDealer · 16/05/2014 17:08

tell you got it wrong and actualy it only has one tiny bedroom, so sorry

bobblewobble · 16/05/2014 17:09

Could you not tell her it is 3 beds not 3 bedrooms? Make out you hadn't realised? x

Figster · 16/05/2014 17:11
Shock

That is all

BakerStreetSaxRift · 16/05/2014 17:37

Holy Christ, she's a cheeky bitch!

I'd just text and say "nevermind, let's just forget it. DS and I have lots planned and your DC would be upset to be left behind. Plus, 7 prior in a caravan would be far too cramped".

But I'd never want to see the using little bitch again. And I'd tell everyone why.

Peekingduck · 16/05/2014 17:54

Why are people suggesting that Op makes excuses FFS?
Op "Thinking about this, it won't work anyway so I've decided to stick to my original plans and just go with my children". If she comes back with any protest at all -
"No, it won't work for me. I'd prefer to just go away with the kids".
Emotional blackmail that her kids won't get a holiday now?
"Oh really? Never mind, I'm sure you can have a lot of fun at home".

Peekingduck · 16/05/2014 17:56

Any reasons why not that you give, she can argue about. For example.

"Oh no, mine won't be upset to be left behind, we'll find things to do".
"No, it won't be too small. We can put xyz in xys rooms and we'll bring a little tent".
This is why you have to be brief, honest and to the point.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 16/05/2014 18:00

Wow! Turns out people can still surprise me! Cheeky mare! Wish my balls were half as big as hers!

Whocansay · 16/05/2014 18:16

Text back and say that you understand that she couldn't possibly be expected to put up with someone as selfish as you, so you accept that she can no longer come.

Of just text "FTFO you freeloading bitch!"

I'm astounded by her cheek! YANBU, obviously!

Bloodyteenagers · 16/05/2014 18:29

Just tell her no fucking way you free loading cheeky fucker. Even she was to put her hand in her pocket it is still no.

Why do you need to make excuses? Just be truthful. What's the worse that will happen? She wont be your mate? From here, that isn't an issue.

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