16 Kids and Counting

[Shinyfly]

So I've just watched this (recorded last night). AIBU to think that both of these couples just have stopped at one or two?

These were (just a couple) of the red flags for me.

1. The first family had 11 kids (number 12 made an appearance at the end of the programme). All of their children were home schooled and the only time they were permitted to mix with other children was once a week at boys/girls brigade. Mum Tania has a three year plan to have them living in the country and even more isolated from society very soon.

1. The second family were completely devoid of any rules/routines/boundaries, the house was complete chaos with children sleeping in their clothes and the older children being made to supervise the younger ones homework. Dad's clothes were always filthy.

Bth families seemed intent on having more children.

I just can't work out how the home school mum can do 13 lots of differentiated work. Surely that would tax the most talented of teachers......

From what i remember about the program is that the older children spent their school time on pcs. The mum didnt actually set the work.

Given that you used to work in the EHE dept and now work for social care, does this mean you have seen the DofE guidance confirming that HE is not In Itself a welfare issue?

You may also have seen some of the information around comparing the rates of abuse amongst HE kids and schooled kids

And the exceptionally low rates of SAOs obtained alongside the high rates of those determined to be meeting the legislative requirements?

I have a friend who does HE with her boys. In fact the younger lad does alot of his work online (maths etc) and the older lad goes to a special sort of mini school for kids who are HE but who want to do their GCSEs. I'm not saying this is the case for all HE kids but her two are bored stiff alot of the time and she is constantly trying to find other kids to play with them.

I tend to agree with Spock.

I was home-educated. I know a mix of people who also were. We vary from total and utter success stories who got into the local paper after getting an Oxbridge offer, and people with no qualifications and no references for jobs, after having survived a psychologically toxic childhood.

These days, taking actual courses (GCSEs/A-levels) as a private candidate has become very difficult, due to the structure of the modern exam system (controlled assessments, et cetera.), so you will find that the modern success stories are not entirely home-grown, and went to an accepting sixth-form/FE college.

I will be sending my children to school, barring school issues, as between us, my husband and I would only be able to deliver adequate secondary-age instruction in 7 subjects. I personally regard that as too narrow, and would not want to deprive a child of all the other subjects.

...oh... I had hoped this was about the Duggars too. I don't know how they do it or how Michelle never seems to raise her voice!

Didn't read all the posts so someone might have already said this... The Duggars have 19 kids now! At least one of them is married with kids already as well

www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2627646/Derick-Dillard-ask-Jill-Duggar-begin-official-courtship-pair-share-hug-new-clip-19-Kids-And-Counting.html

There are advantages and disadvantages to any size of family. It's not like small families are immune to being dysfunctional.

I don't agree with stopping child benefits after a certain number of children. For starters child benefit is for the benefit of the child (clue's in the name) who has had no choice in the matter.

If I don't have kids someone else can have my share.

The Duggars make my uterus contract into my throat.

Building your own religion is scary. Teaching your children that your mother's a jungle gym open to Dad 24/7 and you're to grow up doing the same is mind-boggling. For sex being so sinful, it seems to be a good time-passer.

Also, it's hypo-fucking-critical to ban TV from your children and then make money from a TV show exploiting the lives of your children.

It was the Salim family that upset me - their kids going to sleep in their uniforms!? And no sheets on the beds? The place was like a doss house. I was wondering if he was a bit bi polar as he seemed to be very high acting too.

Also, for two parents who don't work the house was a terrible state, I couldn't live like that. Talking about having more kids, the Radcliffes to their credit aren't on huge amounts of benefits - well child benefit will amount to a good whack I suppose, but she's in love with babies, and her dd who is also quite young in living below them with her second on the way at a young age. It always makes me pause and think when people say should I have another baby? The question is, should you have another teenager to try and send to college/uni and can you treat them all equally.

Mealtimes were a production line, and bedtime the same, lovely kids but please stop now.

Gosh, i hate the term 'breeding'. Animals breed. Talking about people's children that way is vile and if someone said that to my face i would not be responsible for what i say back, but of course keyboards warriors would never say to people what they they type about them. Hiding behind computer screens spouting vile BS makes me

A friend of mine has 11 siblings. She recalls many times as a child or teenager when she would be trying to talk to her parents because she was upset about something and she knew they weren't listening as too distracted by too many kids!. She gave up trying after a while.

None of her siblings feel they got enough attention and a few of them developed quite extreme 'personas' in a bid to stand out in some way.

None of them want big families themselves.

Gosh, I hate this removal of ourselves from the animal kingdom as if we are some sort of special entity rather than just a different species of animal. Gosh I would even go so far as to say such blind ignorance of what we are and where we have come from is rather a lot of the problem in this world.

Animals breed, people breed, populations breed. Get over it.

As for the Radcliffes not being on a 'lot' of benefits, I beg to differ, they clearly get vast amounts in Child Tax Credit as well as Child Benefit. If they didn't I am betting they would not keep having them as they are.

Aeroflotgirl I completely agree. You don't have quality time. Also, what often happens is that the oldest daughters nearly always become more of a mother to the little ones than the actual mother. I've seen it happen a few times in my own family. (Not mine directly, we are larger ham average but split over different marriages. But my mother's family is enormous as is my DH's.)
This might annoy some people, but frankly if you have more than three or four kids then I think there is some psychological issue at play. A desire to recreate something you never had or an OCD behaviour with real live babies. All of the key parents from the show - especially the mother who had another one - seemed like they needed counselling, not babies.
My heart broke for those kids in the Salim family, and for the mother as well. Just awful. If the mother lives past sixty I'd be amazed. I had a great aunt who had fourteen children (that survived) and she looked about 90 when she was 50. Needless to say, she didn't live much into her sixties. (Although this was in a developing country.)

The Radcliffes being adopted has got to be a significant psychological factor in their constant reproduction.

Who knows about the others but it's just not a healthy situation for any of them. Just awful.

There is a lot of love in the Radcliffes with structure and fun.

I don't see structure in the one of the families and I didn't see much fun in the HS family.

Sorry, but no one needs to have that size of family. I don't believe it is good for the children as they cannot possibly get sensible parenting time with either or both parent, the state must be supporting them enormously unless the parents are earning many hundreds of thousands of pounds each year and the population of the world is increasing at an alarming rate and causing environmental damage. I think we should be rewarding people for NOT having children the way it's going or at least doing an awful lot more to encourage people to stop after 2 or 3 (sorry Catholics).

I felt sorry for all the children, you cannot possibly give an child the attention they deserve with so many siblings. It is just an operation to get through day to day and that is sad.

I am one of four and sometimes felt I didn't get the attention I needed growing up but imagine being completely invisible...just a number.

I really don't know how each child gets 'quality time' with their parents.

I couldn't cope!

20 mins 1-1 reading every night with each child would take 5 1/2 hours with 16 children!! So obviously that doesn't get done

16 children having a bath! Assuming at least 8 of them probably need help with hair/ watching near or in water etc if under certain age

How can you help with homework/ music practice/ teach to ride bike / bake a cake etc with that many.

How many carrots would you have to chop for 18 at meal times!

The family are called radford not radcliffe.

They definately need some form of therapy. They seem to be having children to fill a hole from their childhoods.

I rewatched this series recently on 4OD, I findall of the families fascinating.

The mum from the homeschooling family runs a website/blog [[http://www.largerfamilylife.com/ here]] which gives a much better insight into their lives than the tv program, I think, especially about the home education and the accusations of her putting her health at risk which were quite coloured as to how they were edited on tv it would seem.

I have to say it is incredibly disheartening to read that someone working with families who home educate has such a ridiculously blinkered and judgemental view of it.

Hmm clearly I can't do links. Ah well it's there.

The Radford's are clearly obsessed with popping out babies due to unaddressed issues from their own upbringing. It would be interesting to see the family planning choices their own children make in years to come.

How could you possibly keep track of what's going on in the day to day lives of 16 children? Just a selfish desire for cute little babies.