Baby pics on FB

[Erroltheowl]

AIBU a friend mentioned to me the other day about how great it will be to put cute baby pics on fb once i have had a baby,but i turned around and said i wont be because it is wrong on so many levels IMHO and i (think) i would be too busy caring for baby doing the laundry for baby sterilising bottles etc to even sit down and finish an entire hot drink and watch 30 mins of tv if i did have spare time it would mean something needed doing and i wasnt doing it, plus i don't know what my facebook friends do in there spare time or what goes through their minds (if it was that easy to detect a pedo they wouldn't exist) even though my entire FB is privatised and i don't allow followers of people to find me in search engines someone could still hack my account for the heck of it and see pics of my PFB AIBU i'd rather keep my children off facebook and the internet until it their own choice whether or not they want to become a part of that at 16.

It doesn't seem to occur to people that not everyone has a baby that sleeps endlessly, leaving you with time to pamper yourself.

But did you not have time when you had no choice but to sit still and relax because PFB was feeding? And I don't know about you, I could never do that on its own, I had to have the TV on or a book to read. You can always FB/MN with one hand.

Jolly nice of you to suggest your friends might actually be paedo's - with friends like you...!

Perhaps the OP has one of three "sexy" babies you hear about on MN threads all the time

I've never got the whole 'baby pictures on Facebook' hysteria... But this is a whole new level of cuckoo.

Agent - I disagree that OP is having bad time on this thread because of her spelling & grammar (although I did ROAR at "my entire FB is privatised" ). It is simply that she seems delightfully paranoid, with paedos waiting to hack her FB account for a few pictures of her fully-clothed baby etc.

Also, imho this is her 1st baby (said " I (think) I would be too busy) so she is understandably rather clueless. Reminds me of my insistence while pregnant that DC would never watch TV

YANBU to not want your baby on FB - that is your choice to make. However I am a little concerned by your reasoning. To assume there is a peado 'round every corner' is not a healthy way to live. Will you never leave the house for fear of a paedo taking a sneaky pic or a pervy security guard looking at CCTV? You cannot live like that, always assuming the worst of people.

Of course we should protect our children, but you are being very OTT imo.

Also a word of warning - be sure and tell everyone what you are doing as eventually someone else will put a pic of your PFB on FB.

YANBU to not put up your baby pics on facebook. Your child,your choice.
YABU to be judgey about people that do.

On the subject of paedophiles, I'd imagine that a generic baby pic can be googled in seconds, no need to hack into your account.

Without wanting to get into too many deeply unpleasant details, I work in the criminal justice system, and I have been involved in a vast number of cases involving indecent images of children, due to Operation Ore.

I have never, ever seen any case involving a personal photo snatched from social media. The images almost always come from sites that share illegal material and are, unfortunately, of abused children being posed for images which are intended for sale.

The bulk of the images come from overseas - the Russian authorities are in the middle of a big clamp down at the moment - and the same images tend to come up again and again.

The other type of image that comes up with any sort of regularity is of teenagers who have sent pictures of themselves to someone who is grooming them - so someone they know. Very occasionally, you get an otherwise innocent image that's been shared by a family member with someone they know through some illegal site or other.

I've never come across an 'innocent' picture that's been stolen by a stranger, and I've never seen Facebook/Instagram/etc involved in case of this type.

My baby doesn't sleep for endless hours or allow me 'pampering time'. But he does spend hours feeding, for which I need to be sitting down. I have a toddler as well, I'm certainly busy. But a lot of it isn't tangible activity such as chores. Whilst typing this post I've fed the baby, built a Cinderella figure and cuddled the toddler. I'm busy but the pace of my day is slow and I'm sitting down - often with one free hand - for a lot of it. I've watched plenty of tv and drunk numerous cups of tea. There are plenty of things that need doing and I won't get to them all - but sitting down and sniffing the baby's baldy head for a while is a perfectly legitimate use of my time - relaxing, bonding, soothing...you don't have to be charging around non stop sterilising things. Don't go on FB if you don't want to, but don't feel lazy or guilty for sitting down!

OP
I think your choice over posting pictures on FB or not is fine. Do as you will it's your choice.
But it is a pretty risk free activity tbh. Your child is not in danger from pictures posted on FB so I wouldn't worry about that.

But please don't decide that your every waking moment has to be spent actively doing things for your baby. Your baby is not a prison term. And your child's life will be much better if she/he has a happy, rested mother who is enjoying life. It's meant to be joyful.

I don't think many parents of babies will have much trouble keeping their children off Facebook.
Facebook is very old hat and dull for increasing numbers of teenagers. It's becoming a medium for the middle aged. It's the superdry of social media.

Ok, first off, it's entirely up to you if you put pics on your fb page, it's not compulsory.
Second quit panicking. You may have a dream baby, you may have one that thinks sleep is for wimps but it's highly likely that you will indeed get a chance for a hot brew every now and then! You sound like you're expecting to give birth to be a slave to the household.
Wrt to the whole peado hysteria, again think it through rationally. Because if you don't you'll spend the next 18 years in a state of utter terror, but being hyper aware/paranoid does not make you a better parent than anybody else.
On balance YABU and you need to considerate possibility that you're being over anxious. Maybe a word or 2 with your midwife might be an idea?

Going to throw this out there, but I don't think peadophiles would be that bothered about a baby just sitting there or doing everyday activities...

It's not the spelling or the punctuation of the op - it's the tone of anxiety and panic and the phrases like "fb seems like a cold harsh place for sweet baby pics"... Do it, don't do it, but calm down about it for heavens sake woman!

privacy settings

Yawn

Surely you have your privacy settings to friends only and you don't add known paedophiles?
Totally irrational and to be honest you sound rather nuts!

Do what you want love.

I think you need to unclench though.

Op
Will you make members of the public close their eyes when you pass by ? Just on case they accidently look at your baby

That was really hard work to read and completely pointless. Don't put pictures of your children on Facebook if you don't want to

Oh insancerre, that was funny.

I bet you're one of those pre-parents who has very firm ideas about how they are going to parent aren't you?

I have many photo of my DC on Facebook.

Yanbu to keep them off Facebook, but I will say its hard to keep them off the internet till 16.

My ds aged 8 goes online in school. My niece and nephew have homework which they have to do online.

Dear OP
You need to unclench or you're going to find parenthood extremely hard work. You're not even pregnant yet and already playing the martyr mother card. Snap out of it !

And "paedos" are not lurking everywhere. Similarly to another poster i have also dealt with lots of this sort of crime. All the victims have been the defendants' family members. In the words of public enemy Don't Believe the Hype

Thankyou for your time

Sounds like facebook isn't for you. That's ok, you know.

Suits me well -we've been pretty mobile for work reasons and have friends and family scattered across the UK. It's an ideal platform for sharing this stuff and there are lots of security/privacy options. Personally, I wouldn't post naked baby pics but generally I don't suspect my family and friends of being paedos :-)