Baby pics on FB

[Erroltheowl]

AIBU a friend mentioned to me the other day about how great it will be to put cute baby pics on fb once i have had a baby,but i turned around and said i wont be because it is wrong on so many levels IMHO and i (think) i would be too busy caring for baby doing the laundry for baby sterilising bottles etc to even sit down and finish an entire hot drink and watch 30 mins of tv if i did have spare time it would mean something needed doing and i wasnt doing it, plus i don't know what my facebook friends do in there spare time or what goes through their minds (if it was that easy to detect a pedo they wouldn't exist) even though my entire FB is privatised and i don't allow followers of people to find me in search engines someone could still hack my account for the heck of it and see pics of my PFB AIBU i'd rather keep my children off facebook and the internet until it their own choice whether or not they want to become a part of that at 16.

[slithytove]

I know that anyone can of course. But I can't live my life thinking that anyone in my friendship groups or family could be a paedophiles and if I thought one was, they would not be part of my life.

To not be sure of your friends makes me wonder why they are friends.

[PrincessBabyCat]

your tiny baby who will initially look exactly like every other newborn

That is not true. My baby was a precious and unique snowflake. Unlike those other babies.

[slithytove]

I've not mentioned the grammar and spelling btw

[AgentZigzag]

'To not be sure of your friends makes me wonder why they are friends.'

How many threads are on here when you see someone maintaining contact with family or friends who are obviously fucking them up?

People stay close to other people for all sorts of reasons, even when they know themselves that it's not good for them. It's difficult to give them the boot if you have other people pressuring you to STFU and gloss over someone's 'unusual' behaviour because they're salt of the earth etc.

Not everyone is lucky enough to be surrounded by lovely people who only bring happiness and glittery kitten shit with them.

[AgentZigzag]

I didn't even notice the lack of punctuation

[sykadelic]

You are completely within your rights not to put photos of your kids on the internet if that is your wish. It does however, appear to me that you aren't very internet/FB savvy so it's best to leave all that stuff to the "pros".

My view is that it's fine if I put photos up, but don't steal my photos to put on your wall, or upload photos without permission.

I'm not worried about any of my "friends" being paedophiles because I actually know all the people on my site. I also don't plan on uploading naked photos or whatever.

[OrangeMochaFrappucino]

I'm most worried by the assertion that if I have any free time it means there is something that needs doing that I'm not doing. That's a very worrying attitude to have with a new baby, OP, rest is very important. And with both of my babies (one of whom is one month old) I have had countless hours to watch tv with a hot drink because my experience of newborns is being pinned to the sofa feeding most of the day! Be prepared - it can be frustrating as you physically can't get a lot done and putting a lot of pressure on yourself to do everything could be very bad for you. Babies slow the pace of life right down - it might feel like a standstill at times. They are tiring and demanding but far from being a whirlwind of activity, you may find yourself unable to get much done at all - and that really doesn't matter.

[slithytove]

People stay close to people for the wrong reasons yes. But that's an informed decision.

That's not the same as saying "one of any of my group of friends might be a paedophile". I mean, if you thought they were, surely it's more about keeping your child away from that one person rather than all of your friends just in case?

I would have to seriously question myself r.e. my paranoia if I thought "maybe one of my friends is a paedophile". (In the absence of having a reason to. And if I had a reason, I would not be their friend)

I'm not expressing myself very well. But say I had 10 friends, and told them "I'm not putting pics on fb incase one of you is a pedo..." Well I think they might be a bit because there should be an element of trust with these people who we allow into our lives.

wish I had friends who produced glittery kitten shit

[slithytove]

Newborn time is bliss :) bf holidays spending all day in bed having snuggles and watching telly , no hoovering ever again because of the sore tummy, needing constant cups of tea bringing to you because of the dehydration, and OH doing all the errands forever more because lo, and you have produced him a child

Bloody brilliant.

OP - you will have time. And if the cleaning slips a little, that is ok/what DH is for/what GP are for/hire a cleaner

And the best advice I can give you is: do not have visitors who expect to be waited on. The worst visitor is the one who comes for baby hugs, expects tea and biscuits from you, and stays put until baby is over tired. Far better they come over with a casserole and get the Hoover out something to consider anyway.

[BigRedBall]

Why would you do the laundry for baby sterilising bottles?

[schokolade]

I have a new baby and haven't uploaded photos of her. I can't really articulate why, I suppose it's a consent issue for me. If she wants to put herself on the Internet when she's older, she can.

Prepare to get similar reactions from Facebook friends to those you've received here OP! Mine won't stop hassling me to put up pics even after I've said I won't be!

[TurquoiseDress]

So don't post your baby's photos on FB then if it worries you so much.

With an iPhone/other similar device it takes seconds to load up a picture.

Even with a demanding newborn you could do this in much less time than it takes to make a cup of tea!

[lunar1]

Bloody hell, I've never used a steriliser, how time consuming is it?

It's a perfectly valid choice not to put your children on Facebook op but your reasons are a little worrying. You won't need to be rushing around doing things all the time.

[MabelBee]

I happen to agree with you. I don't publicise my life or children on Facebook and stopped doing so when I saw how easy it was for family members to download pictures which I had posted of the baby with the strictest of privacy settings, then reposting on their own pages. It made me nervous to think how easily they had shared my baby with people I didn't know. Their intentions weren't bad, they were doing it out of pride, but it was uncomfortable for me because I couldn't control their friends lists or privacy settings.

Incidentally, I have never, with any of my children, had this dreamy baby holiday other posters are saying they had! It doesn't seem to occur to people that not everyone has a baby that sleeps endlessly, leaving you with time to pamper yourself. If I ever did get a minute I'd use it to go to the toilet. If I got 5 I'd try to squeeze in a shower or eat. Or shut my eyes. Facebook is literally the last thing on my list to use precious time for.

[wheresthelight]

Wow some people (op) clearly spend too much time reading the Daily Mail!!!!

Put pictures on Facebook or don't it is your choice but your reasons are utterly ridiculous!

Is it GCSE study leave time already?

[TurquoiseDress]

slithytove
I'm totally with you on the newborn bliss, being able to stay in bed just because and watch endless TV while feeding!

It was an amazing time which I wish was still here, feels ages ago but really only a few months ago.
Ahhhhh

[Delphiniumsblue]

What an odd thread! I only put pictures on FB of people who are on there, so it rules out children. However OP, if serious, seems paranoid and needs to relax or life will be very difficult once the child can walk and talk.

[natwebb79]

I was waiting for Sharon/T-rexing to come up...

[Booboostoo]

iPhones?!!! They can be hacked directly be paedos!

[PunkrockerGirl]

at the thought of keeping them off Facebook till they're 16!

[RabbitSaysWoof]

I don't put dc on fb either, just not comfortable with it, and your op reminded me of the many cold half finished cuppas I would find around my house when dc was in bed, it was hectic sometimes.

[meditrina]

It's not compulsory either to have a FB account in the first place, or to post pix of your DC there. So YANBU to choose not to do so and you shouldn't feel you need to justify that choice,

But I am concerned about the level of work you think a baby will be. If you really think you'll not have time for a few minutes online activity, then can you look to streamline anything before the baby is born?

[MrsDeanAmbrose]

id rather keep my children off facebook and the internet until it their own choice whether or not they want to become a part of that at 16

Good luck with that one.
Best make sure you don't have a tv in the house as well, and no newspapers. They're everywhere those paedos, don't you know.

[IwinIwin]

Good luck keeping them off fb or off photos. The moment they have a class photo taken I can guarantee at least two parents will put them on facebook to show off their children. Not to mention getting caught in the odd photo at parties and special occasions, the majority of people have camera capable phones and these get used much more frequently

YANBU to not want pictures on facebook, you sound pretty rambling about your reasoning though especially since predators are more likely to be known people to your child, not so much outside randoms. I had plenty of pictures taken of me as a child with my closest friends, including ones in the paddling pool. The worry shouldn't have been joe bloggs developing the film it should have been the vile bastard that was 'enjoying them' and molesting/later raping my friend that was her step-parent who took some of them.

They won't care about your pfb OP, no one cares enough to just through hoops when there's google images and there's plenty of staged non-precious first borns that are being used for this sadly. My best friend included.

The whole not being able to sit down for a cup of tea? Largely bollocks and something people use to 'martyr' themselves and exaggerate. My mother never had time for tea, it was 'always cold'. Not because she didn't have time, she did, she just hose not to make it or take it. She was too busy trying to look busy and feeling guilty if she stopped for a moment despite my dad and every other bugger telling her to.

[Delphiniumsblue]

It is only those with babies who think they can keep them off FB until 16yrs!
There are too many cameras around theses days- you can't police it unless you become a recluse.
No need to become a 'mummy martyr' -find time for you.