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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let a 6yo go to the shop with friends?

70 replies

Dramatic · 02/05/2014 22:04

Would you or have you? My dd has been playing out in the street for a couple of years and her two friends who are a year older than her regularly go to the shop (which is about a 2 minute walk away) and she has been begging me to go with them. It's across two reasonably quiet roads (although one is a bus route) and she is very mature and sensible for her age. Am I being stupid by letting her go?

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 02/05/2014 22:06

No way!

6 years is no where near old or sensible enough to go to the shops without a grown up

Their road sense is not well enough developed nor their sense of risk

YABVU

rubyslippers · 02/05/2014 22:08

This reply has been deleted

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BarbaraPalmer · 02/05/2014 22:10

she'll be fine - my 7yo is going to Kavos with her mates at half-term.

Pleasejustgo · 02/05/2014 22:12

I sent my toddler to Waitrose for some sprouting broccoli and gin.

Kleptronic · 02/05/2014 22:13

Six years old is too young to be going anywhere without an adult, unless the age of the age of the children accompanying is over 12.

If you are real, have a word with yourself.

AgentZigzag · 02/05/2014 22:15

YABU, it's not fair to make 7 YOs responsible for a 6 YO, far too young.

You're giving me ideas now Pleasejustgo Grin

BelleateSebastian · 02/05/2014 22:16

BarbaraPalmer hahahahahaha :) :)

TucsonGirl · 02/05/2014 22:25

I think I was walking to the local shop at 6, across one road I think. And tbh I don't think it's really any dangerous today than it was back then, as long as you have taught her road sense etc. 6 might be too young I guess. 8 is certainly old enough. Maybe make her wait at least 1 more year, or walk halfway with her.

Sirzy · 02/05/2014 22:28

6 is too young.

Original poster
Dramatic · 02/05/2014 22:29

She is 7 next month and it seems quite normal round here for young kids to be going out of the street alone or with other kids. I was apprehensive about letting her, hence posting here. Off to have a word with myself...

OP posts:
Kleptronic · 02/05/2014 22:36

The small people cannot judge the speed of vehicles in the same way that the big people can. True scientifically determined fact.

A great many small people got, and get, away with crossing roads without being hit by vehicles before their brains were/are able to process the speed of moving vehicles.

Luck is not road sense.

GreenPetal94 · 02/05/2014 22:45

too young in my opinion, unless there were no roads

AlexVause · 02/05/2014 22:50

No way. Just no.

AgentZigzag · 02/05/2014 22:50

It's all the different scenarios my overactive imagination I can think of that a 6/7 YO wouldn't know how to deal with that'd worry me. Not just crossing the road, but maybe someone talking to them in a plausible way (to a 6/7 YO) when actually they're more interested in them being out without an adult.

Especially if they're doing it a lot, people notice.

Original poster
Dramatic · 02/05/2014 22:53

So how old do you all consider to be acceptable?

OP posts:
blackcats73 · 02/05/2014 22:56

Mine go to Gregs and buy pasties and fruit shoots for themselves. For me they but 10 bensons, lard cake and beef dripping.

bouncingbelle · 02/05/2014 23:02

A few sarky answers here OP but where I live it IS fairly common to see 5/6/7 year olds at the shops on their own. Admittedly most of my friends don't allow it, but some do. Most don't have to cross the road but a few do. Several 5 year olds also walk themselves, or walk with a friend/older sibling, to school as well. It's a close-knit village as opposed to a city tho, where everyone really does know everyone, maybe it would be different in London for example.

As for how old is old enough, I would think 7 if the shop is VERY close and the child had proved they could cross a road safely when out with me, but that's just me!

Pleasejustgo · 02/05/2014 23:03

Agentzigzag

I tie a very long rope around one ankle so no chance of said toddler getting lost or making me wait for my gin ??

I'm the model parent aren't I

AgentZigzag · 02/05/2014 23:06

The answer to how old is different for every child, but that doesn't help because you thought your DD was OK to go to the shop now, so I'm not sure how you'd tell when she is ready.

What is it about her that made you think she would be safe to deal with the majority of unusual situations that could plausibly happen?

You mentioned her friends were a year older, did you think that they would 'protect' her if anything was to happen?

Do you think it's fair on them to feel responsible should anything happen to her when she's with them, whether it's straight afterwards or when they're adults and can understand more complicated situations?

AgentZigzag · 02/05/2014 23:11

You should get medals and shit Pleasejustgo

My youngest is 4, I reckon she could carry back at least two carrier bags of munchies and alcohol shopping.

Pleasejustgo · 02/05/2014 23:17

I get enough shit from my 'wonderful' OH thanks, surpassed himself tonight he has ;), I'll take the medals and booze though. Definitely the booze, especially if it's some wines. I'm going through a Malbec phase. So yes, yes to that.

Oh, and if you balance the shopping weight evenly over the 4 years olds tiny frame he/she should be able to manage quite a bit. Think donkey loading.

I'm a bad person.

Nanny0gg · 02/05/2014 23:18

Children don't even have any road sense before 7.

hippo123 · 02/05/2014 23:22

My son has been going to the local shop, 2 mins away crossing one minor road since 5/6 years old.. It depends where you live, lay out of the roads etc. if you think it's ok, it's ok. There's plenty of places I wouldn't let a 6 year old walk to a shop, or 9 year old, even if it was only 2 minutes away. Thankfully I don't live in one of those places.. Your child, you area, your choice.

hippo123 · 02/05/2014 23:24

My 3 year old had road sense nanny' obviously not as good as an older child but good enough. Depends on how you teach them and the kind of roads your talking about.

Original poster
Dramatic · 02/05/2014 23:24

Yes but can she pour you the gin and replenish it before you even have to ask for the entire evening? If not, clearly not worth it.

So really though, maybe 8 or 9?

OP posts: