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AIBU?

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Original poster

Nursery went home and left dd!

999 replies

lookingfortheanswer · 28/04/2014 18:36

Posting here for traffic, I don't have an aibu.

Went to pick up dd from nursery this afternoon and found the whole place locked up and nobody there. After frantically calling, banging on doors, checking nobody else had picked her up we managed to contact the neighbouring school. The staff who were still there were amazing, helped us to get into the building where we found dd on the toilet, on her own, lights off and doors closed, staff gone home. It took us half an hour to get in so she was there at least that long. She was obviously very upset but is now home and fine and drinking lemonade as a treat while I try to stop shaking.

Obviously this is a huge safeguarding issue and there is no way she is going back. The head of the neighbouring school has been in touch and is organising a meeting for the morning.

Any advice on where to go from here, who to complain to? Should we get legal advice? I am so so angry!

OP posts:
FunnyFoot · 29/04/2014 16:45

As far as I was concerned I wasn't wrong. I did not accuse the OP of being a troll I said I didn't believe the thread. I have had 3/4 posts deleted but most remain. So although my questioning may have been harsh and MNHQ have stated that they disagree with me and have no reason to believe the thread is not real then I have apologised, as I said I would. I did not troll hunt so I did not go against the guidelines.

BubbleButt79 · 29/04/2014 16:46

How late were you?
Whilst the whole situation is ridiculous, I'm assuming that you called the nursery (as is standard practice if parents are running late / may not be there for closing time), and told them you were running late - and this whole situation is because the nursery then didn't leave a staff member with your child?

Yeah, the nursery is in the wrong, and deserves the correct/proper sanctions - but also make sure you did what you are required to do to forewarn them you would not be there on time to pick them up........

candycoatedwaterdrops · 29/04/2014 16:47

She wasn't late!!!

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 29/04/2014 16:48

BubbleButt79

RTFT.

FatalCabbage · 29/04/2014 16:49

RTFT - I appreciate that it's long but that should give you a hint that the question might already have been answered.

OP wasn't late.

Nursery was locked up at least half an hour before its closing time anyway.

Even if she had been late, nursery should have a policy for dealing with it that doesn't involve "lock a 2yo into the building and sod off home".

Goldmandra · 29/04/2014 16:52

I have had 3/4 posts deleted but most remain.

If you hadn't been in the wrong your posts would not have been deleted.

Yeah, the nursery is in the wrong, and deserves the correct/proper sanctions - but also make sure you did what you are required to do to forewarn them you would not be there on time to pick them up........

The OP was not late but that is irrelevant. The child was put at significant risk of harm while in the care of the staff. The would be 100% at fault whether the OP was on time or two hours late.

BubbleButt79 · 29/04/2014 16:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

YouTheCat · 29/04/2014 16:53

Funnyfoot, that 'harsh questioning' and saying you don't believe the OP, is called troll hunting. You don't need a pith helmet and a gun to go hunting.

You broke the talk guidelines, many times, and you were like a dog with a bone. If you suspect a thread is not genuine then you report and wait to see if you're right.

YouTheCat · 29/04/2014 16:54

Bubble, if you doubt the OP, why bother posting? Hmm

midwifeandmummy · 29/04/2014 16:54

My aunt has worked in a nursery for 25 years and I told her about this. She was shocked in all her time, she has never of this kind of thing happening

I can understand why people are struggling to believe certain aspects of this story. Its just sooo unbelievable.
I dont think its lies at all. I cant express how sorry I am for op dd and dp.

LEMmingaround · 29/04/2014 16:54

Can someone tell me the outcone pleade?

Ruushii · 29/04/2014 16:57

I'm still curious about the name change thing. Not on a troll hunting level. Just on an it's bugging me level.

candycoatedwaterdrops · 29/04/2014 16:57

BubbleButt MNHQ have already said it is true so, zip it or report it.

FunnyFoot · 29/04/2014 16:57

Absolutely TheCat

BertieBotts · 29/04/2014 17:00

LEM the OP has had a meeting with the nursery and LEA bods and they are going to find her another nursery/CM place and look into this nursery's procedures. They have a supervisory person there for the next 2 weeks to check things are being done correctly but they have not closed the nursery or made any announcement to parents.

TheZeeTeam · 29/04/2014 17:00

As much as I agree with there's no need for a public shaming, I'd be pretty bloody annoyed if I was looking for a new nursery and chose it, only to find that this had happened so recently. It's a major f**k up.

When DS was 5, we went on a weeks skiing holiday and DH dropped him off at Ski school on the first morning, waited for him to be allocated his class and then left him to go and ski. I was pg so couldn't ski. I came up the mountain 2 hours later, and found DS stood at the bottom of the slope crying. The class had left for the lesson, leaving him behind by accident and he'd stood there for nearly 2 hours not knowing what to do.

Unfortunately, for the ski instructor, the manager of the ski school and the resort manager, they got the full wrath of a heavily pregnant, hormonal mother in Mama Bear mode. Blush On the upside, DS was treated like a prince for the rest of the week!! Grin

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves · 29/04/2014 17:01

What candycoatedwaterdrops said.

CheerfulYank · 29/04/2014 17:07

I used to work at a nursery and let me tell you, this could ABSOLUTELY happen.

The one where I worked was pretty decent but also obviously a business. At the end of the day we worked within the ratios. As soon as you dropped down to whatever the ratio was for the youngest child,a worker had 15 minutes to clean up the room and then clock out. And so on and so on. Near the end of the day when kids were getting picked up left and right and others being herded into other rooms I can completely see how one would get missed.

I have only used private childminders for my own kids for this reason, among others.

LEMmingaround · 29/04/2014 17:07

Thanks Bertie - that sounds reasonable i guess, although if it were my child i guess i'd be going for the jugular. Did they say how this happened? Sorry, can't wade through 37 pages!

Quangle · 29/04/2014 17:17

TheZeeTeam, how awful Shock

Did no one passing by spot him?

Aeroflotgirl · 29/04/2014 17:20

Exactly cheerful, profit above care. But before staff vacate tge building for the day, do they nit check every room to be safe.

halfwildlingwoman · 29/04/2014 17:33

Oh My God. Being on this forum is like being with a bunch of teenagers that Never Listen. As I do that all day for my job I think I will have to leave, this place is bloody awful at the moment!

If you don't believe a thread, REPORT IT! Don't post "I don't believe this." It's rude, bitchy and it could stop someone who needs help getting help, or make someone feel worse. OP is clearly genuine, and if you don't think she is, don't reply on the thread, REPORT IT!

OP, I really hope you and your family are OK today. I know it's easy to say, but try not to dwell on the 'might haves' and focus on the 'didn'ts'. Good luck.

mrsbucketxx · 29/04/2014 17:35

Wow it really kicked off on here.

Glad you dont have to leave dd there again and the la are doing the right thing.

Mintyy · 29/04/2014 17:41

LEM - don't you have the op's posts highlighted so that you can see them easily when scrolling through? You could also do control f (for find) and type lookingfortheanswer in the little search box that pops up.

wannaBe · 29/04/2014 17:45

given that there have been cases of children getting out of nurseries on to roads, and paedophiles operating in nurseries sending pictures to other paedophiles I fail to see how this is beyond the realms of possibility.

Fact is, sometimes procedures fail. A nursery local to where I used to live had an incident where a dairy allergic child was given cow's milk and died. There were huge investigations and the national press were involved. But afaik the nursery never closed - not even at the height of the investigation.

I wouldn't necessarily go to the press but I would be expecting the nursery to make a statement to parents to at least inform them that an investigation was under way. Failure to do so is covering up IMO and makes the nursery look much worse - you start to wonder then what else they have to hide.