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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Nursery went home and left dd!

999 replies

lookingfortheanswer · 28/04/2014 18:36

Posting here for traffic, I don't have an aibu.

Went to pick up dd from nursery this afternoon and found the whole place locked up and nobody there. After frantically calling, banging on doors, checking nobody else had picked her up we managed to contact the neighbouring school. The staff who were still there were amazing, helped us to get into the building where we found dd on the toilet, on her own, lights off and doors closed, staff gone home. It took us half an hour to get in so she was there at least that long. She was obviously very upset but is now home and fine and drinking lemonade as a treat while I try to stop shaking.

Obviously this is a huge safeguarding issue and there is no way she is going back. The head of the neighbouring school has been in touch and is organising a meeting for the morning.

Any advice on where to go from here, who to complain to? Should we get legal advice? I am so so angry!

OP posts:
spanky2 · 28/04/2014 22:00

There is nothing wrong with getting support online once your dc is okay, which is what the op said.

Bunbaker · 28/04/2014 22:01

"Think spiders point was that the kid was at nursery all day, then left alone and the first thing hmm does at home is go on mumsnet. Not about the working."

The OP came on here for advice. Isn't that what MN is for?

Sigyn · 28/04/2014 22:02

Also-christ this is a long way back now. I'm not sure that at two my kids were in the loos alone. Or if they were it was those kid ones with the half doors. I think an adult standing in the kids toilets would be able to see that a child was there very easily. Again for this very reason.

All nurseries are different, but it seems to me that quite a lot of small things have to go wrong for this to happen. Or one big thing, like a grossly negligent staff member.

FunnyFoot · 28/04/2014 22:02

Interpretation is the mother of all fuck ups...........or is that assumption Grin

No worries clam this is a difficult and fast paced thread.

TattiePants · 28/04/2014 22:02

Funnyfoot where does OP say that her DP is not her DDs father?

scottishmummy · 28/04/2014 22:03

My kids go nursery ft mon-fri until til 6pm
That in no way means if they were locked in itd be my fault because of that attendance mode

RiverTam · 28/04/2014 22:03

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Minifingers · 28/04/2014 22:03

Someone at the nursery made a mistake. Mistakes happen. A reception child got out of my dsis' school, another managed to leave my dc's school. Mistakes happen EVEN with systems in place to stop them happening. This occurs in all professions and at home.

Tell OFSTED in the morning. Now stop frothing everyone.

RiverTam · 28/04/2014 22:04

xpost with bunbaker.

FunnyFoot · 28/04/2014 22:04

OP's thread last week said so.

DakotaFanny · 28/04/2014 22:06

Holy fuck! Cake for your baby. Wine Wine Wine for you.

ShakesBootyFlabWobbles · 28/04/2014 22:06

I haven't read the whole thread only the OP's posts.

OP just wanted to say, something very similar unbelievably happened to our daughter at nursery, she was locked in on her own for about 25 minutes. I think our experience was less awful than yours as it happened at lunchtime and she was found by the returning staff after their break rather than by me or DH, and the nursery volunteered the incident details to us in full. She came to no physical harm by some miracle while she was on her own, and was apparently calm when she was found, so I will always be grateful for that.

I just wanted to let you know that she has came through it pretty much unscathed and quite quickly, so your daughter may too, but I appreciate not all children are the same and don't want to minimise her reaction in any way. My husband and I were both a bit shaken and teary for about 2-3 weeks with all the 'what ifs' and telling family, but after that things settled down with us too.

Just wanted to give you some support and hope really, and to let you know you do get through it. Thanks

scottishmummy · 28/04/2014 22:06

Frothing,is getting upset at misspelt name
This merits contacting local authority and ofsted
Ask LA initiate safe guarding

stayanotherday · 28/04/2014 22:06

Hope you and your daughter are okay op.

candycoatedwaterdrops · 28/04/2014 22:07

Fucking hell. Sad Your poor little girl and you, of course! I used to work in a nursery and we spent at least 20 mins tidying after the children left, so they certainly buggered off early. It sounds disorganised as hell from what you're saying; sessions here and there.

Your DD will bounce back. Children are resilient creatures and she probably didn't realise the impact of what happened.

Wine for you and extra Cake for your DD.

Wantsunshine · 28/04/2014 22:08

Spider you clearly have issues. Was Jeremy Kyle not on today so you had nothing to do?

Sigyn · 28/04/2014 22:09

Bit of a difference between a (I assume) school age kid getting out of school and a 2 yo being left alone for half an hour when everyone had gone home Hmm.

stayanotherday · 28/04/2014 22:10

Spider has probably been a guest on that show.

bochead · 28/04/2014 22:12

You can't let children see how upset you are by some things, so this is a safe space to vent. An incident like that needs a good vent! It's not being hysterical, just very sensible to have a wee vent in the safe space of Mumsnet. Any mother who wouldn't be upset by todays events, would I think not be human ffs!

OP do you have to work tomorrow? IF so please email your boss tonight explaining what's happened and why you won't be in come morning. The earlier you let them know, the less trouble you'll get into and the easier it'll be to focus on what you need to say to the relevant authorities tomorrow. Do get in touch with the family information service in the morning to see if they can help you sort out emergency alternative childcare.

I think the one thing the entire thread agrees on is that you should withdraw your child from that slack facility with immediate effect. Put your reasons in writing ASAP so you won't be charged next months fees for a service that's not fit for purpose, (go online and cancel your monthly direct debit tonight!)

Ruushii · 28/04/2014 22:12

You all kind of lose the moral high ground when you start being like this you know? Uncomfortable to see.

FunnyFoot · 28/04/2014 22:13

Tattiepants OP's thread last week said so.

clam · 28/04/2014 22:13

Most of this thread has been sympathetically constructive, not hysterical.

This, however: "I would be waiting for the manager in the morning to pin her to a wall and threaten her serious bodily harm" Angry Angry Angry is possibly a little OTT.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme · 28/04/2014 22:14

Oh looking what an awful shock. You poor thing and your poor dd. Cannot imagine how scary it must have been. Glad she's ok now and hope you've calmed down. Hope you get some answers tomorrow. Or some heads rolling at any rate. I'd be postal too.

Mintyy · 28/04/2014 22:15

I seem to be the only one who thinks it is a police matter.

KildaTiffany · 28/04/2014 22:15

glad that your dd is safe op.

this is such a serious issue it really should be reported to ofsted and publicised in the press. there is a serious problem if this is remotely possible.