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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

not feeding "meat" to niece and nephew when they stay for one night

192 replies

SuzzieScotland · 21/04/2014 17:07

Been vegan for 9 years and never have meat in the house.

Should I be expected to provide a special meat meal for a 3 and 7 yo when they stay over? Rather than just what I would eat, they would be getting a balanced diet and 10+ fruit veg portions.

Brother in law has kind of suggested it would be unhealthy not to have meat for 24 hours...

OP posts:
FindoGask · 22/04/2014 13:06

I'm aware this makes me a twat, but I still feel compelled to point out that the saying is "no harm, no foul". Sorry.

Marylou2 · 22/04/2014 13:09

YANBU.I'm a committed meat eater but make sure I have at least 2 vegetarian days a week. I'd feed them what you usually eat.

Gruntfuttock · 22/04/2014 13:16

....or in the case of the vegan OP, "no harm, no fowl" Wink

PrimalLass · 22/04/2014 13:38

Your menu sounds lovely but my 6-year-old would cry.

Pasta pesto, baked potato and cheese, pizza etc = all good. I assume you can get vegan cheese?

Almond milk is horrid though, no matter how hard I try to like it in my coffee.

Gileswithachainsaw · 22/04/2014 13:48

Hazelnut milk is nice. It's the best one for coffee !!

ThatBloodyWoman · 22/04/2014 13:50

Yadddddnbu.

Oat milk is my favourite.

Gruntfuttock · 22/04/2014 13:51

PrimalLass your 6 yr old would cry? Why? Because it's cold? Whay would vegan cheese be made from I wonder?

Gruntfuttock · 22/04/2014 13:51

What not Whay.

Gruntfuttock · 22/04/2014 13:53

Sorry. I got my 'lunch' threads mixed up. Blush

ThatBloodyWoman · 22/04/2014 13:53

If I cook my dc's get vegetarian.
If dh cooks they get meat.
They cope.....

I lived with vegans who insisted on a seperate washing up bowl from vegetarians.

We are all different and if it hurts no one else we can eat as we please in our own spaces.

Ubik1 · 22/04/2014 14:05

Just give them pasta or beans on toast or tinned spaghetti on toast. Job done.

ivykaty44 · 22/04/2014 14:05

i drink coffee black as I never liked milk, now there is a range of plant based milks products on the market I have muesli but still have black coffee unless its a frothy latte made with soya.

I would go for falafels in salad pitta pockets with sweet cherry tomato. dd loves pasta and bake beans as they are - strange combination to me but she loves it and I guess isn't that different from on toast or with a potato.

Would the dc eat sweet potatoes in their jackets, they are so much tastier than normal jacket potatoes.

I wouldn't g for vegan cheese just because it is so different from cows milk cheese and there are so many other tasty foods to eat why try to replicate something that may give a negative impression of being vegan - but that is just my view and as someone up the thread said it would be great if you could give them a positive experience of vegan food.

basmati rice cooked with spices and onion is very tasty and simple - something a vegetarian colleague has for lunch regular and a dish a few of my students from the gulf have shared with me (though they make it much hotter than I can eat Grin)

dd loves chickpea curry but only if it is made with tinned chickpeas as they are much softer.

Hope you enjoy your visitors stay OP

PrimalLass · 22/04/2014 14:08

PrimalLass your 6 yr old would cry? Why?

Because she is somewhat food phobic.

PrimalLass · 22/04/2014 14:10

Sorry. I got my 'lunch' threads mixed up. blush

Ha ha, I posted my thing on the Aldi thread first. Obv we need our lunch.

rumbleinthrjungle · 22/04/2014 17:03

If you're catering for a child with particular dietary needs then obv you'd need to make specific plans, but I'd hope kids in my family were used to a wide variety of foods and would be up for trying whatever was offered. But then I've watched the 17 month old knocking back aubergine parmesan like I'd knock back chocolate.

edamsavestheday · 22/04/2014 17:09

I see from that link that Hitler was also a teetotaller and a non-smoker. Odd how non-smokers and people who don't drink booze never get the 'Hitler was a ...' thrown at them.

coldwater1 · 22/04/2014 17:54

No you shouldn't have to feed them meat, its only one night they won't starve without meat for one night!

whois · 22/04/2014 21:05

Nothing wrong (actually good!) to have a meat free day, but I don't think your menu is very child friendly, veggie or not.

Too much veg and fibre and full of interesting and strong flavour combinations!

I might be wrong, but if BiL is saying feed them meat, thb I guess they don't have a very 'adventurous' pallet yet? So like others have said, I would stick to more 'normal' and child friendly things.

Porridge or toast for breakfast.
Give them cows milk if that's what they are used to, that doesn't seem like a massive compromise to your ethics?

Lunch something like beans on toast, jacket potato and vegan cheese, veg soup and crusty bread. Something like that.

Dinner I'd probably go go a quorn spag bol as pretty safe, but appreciate you can't eat that as vegan. Or veggie sausages and mash. Or pasta and vegan pesto, or other suitable sauce. Or a mild vegie chili with rice. Or veggie stir fry if they'll eat that. Or veggie pizza or fajitas.

I think your menu sounds delicious, but for a fully veg and spice and flavor loving adult!

nicename · 23/04/2014 08:02

Hitler was also a dog lover...

ThatBloodyWoman · 23/04/2014 14:01

Benjamin Zephaniah wrote a poem that may address your bil's concerns anout his dc's going without.
It's called Vegan Delight, and worth looking up.

I just cannot understand all the fear around being meat free.

Jinsei · 23/04/2014 15:33

I have thought about this and have conculded that it is probably NOT cruel to bring up a child as a vegetarian - many 3rd world countries have mainly vegy diets, and their children are perfectly happy. I would just be unhappy that my child was missing out on a "normal" lifestyle eg McDonalds/KFC, a nice roast, spagetti carbonara.

I find it rather sad that you think McDonalds/KFC are things that children would miss out on! Personally, I'd feel a little sorry for any child who was brought up to consider such junk as a treat rather than a quick convenience when decent food was unavailable. As for a nice roast or spaghetti carbonara, meh - give me a nice veggie curry any day. :)

SarcyMare · 23/04/2014 15:48

jinsei my kids haven't been raised to think mcdonalds are a treat (i hate them), but because they only have them rarely on days out when nothing else fits into the schedule, they do come to be seen as a treat.

slithytove · 23/04/2014 19:40

Burger King is a massive treat for me

missymayhemsmum · 23/04/2014 22:02

Well, yanbu unreasonable not to feed them meat, but perhaps you need to find some things they will eat that are vegan? Shouldn't be hard to find a days worth surely. (beans on toast x 3?)

zippey · 24/04/2014 01:18

McDonalds/BK/KFC/Chippy/Indian/Chinese/Pizza are all good.

As is a nice veggy curry.

But please do not deny your children or yourselves a nice burger and fries.