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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

not feeding "meat" to niece and nephew when they stay for one night

192 replies

SuzzieScotland · 21/04/2014 17:07

Been vegan for 9 years and never have meat in the house.

Should I be expected to provide a special meat meal for a 3 and 7 yo when they stay over? Rather than just what I would eat, they would be getting a balanced diet and 10+ fruit veg portions.

Brother in law has kind of suggested it would be unhealthy not to have meat for 24 hours...

OP posts:
17leftfeet · 21/04/2014 17:15

I would be fine with my dcs eating a vegan meal

I would not come to your house and expect you to throw all your principles out of the window for the duration of my visit and if I felt that strongly about my dcs eating meat then I wouldn't have accepted the invitation

I would however provide you with a vegan meal if you came to my house -but I wouldn't stop everyone else eating meat/dairy while you were here

Giving them a meat free meal is not the same as forcing them to eat something they really don't agree with

I hope my ramble made sense Grin

Aeroflotgirl · 21/04/2014 17:15

Yanbu one night won't do any harm

Dawndonnaagain · 21/04/2014 17:16

erm, your BIL is a bit thick, isn't he?

Birdsgottafly · 21/04/2014 17:16

"However, I assume you are also happy to not be given something "special" when you visit them - ie you would be happy to just have the same as them but without the animal product part."

It doesn't really compare, if you are vegan.

I carry my own gravy and extras when being catered for.

TheRealYellowWiggle · 21/04/2014 17:17

The younger one might be used still to having milk to drink, I think they'd miss dairy more than meat.

LineRunner · 21/04/2014 17:17

Beans and [vegan] cheese on toast or jacket potatoes.

Vegetable or tomato soup with French garlic bread or granary bread, with margarine.

Pizza with tomato and [vegan] cheese and onion topping.

My DCs often has this at a similarly young age and I am not a vegan. It's perfectly normal.

Chippednailvarnish · 21/04/2014 17:18

Thank fuck you were joking on the other thread Grin

I was about to give you a right lecture!!

Birdsgottafly · 21/04/2014 17:18

On a side note OP, even Iceland sell Vegan jellies a pound a pack (they already sell vegan crisps), so it's getting easier to have low cost treat nights.

nicename · 21/04/2014 17:18

He really doesn't know what you do eat, does he?

He doesn't realise that when he has a pasta arabiatta or napoli, it's vegan?

It sounds like he is worried that you will give them a bale of hay to nibble.

I wouldn't expect a vegan to cook meat, maybe give the kids a glass of milk at a oush.

Uptheairymountain · 21/04/2014 17:19

I thought that was a strange post on the lunch thread, Suzzie Grin. YANBU anyway.

TheCraicDealer · 21/04/2014 17:19

It wouldn't cross my mind that you'd provide a meat option to be honest. However, I would expect that a veggie child's diet would be accommodated at a meat-eating home. It should really work both ways, but a day with no meat will not hurt them. If you're bothered about keeping your BIL quiet then get a tin of spaghetti/beans and sausages and pop it on some wholemeal toast. It's safely contained within a tin (less contamination of your kitchen) and so overly processed the jury's out over whether it actually constitutes meat Grin

SaucyJack · 21/04/2014 17:19

YANBU.

Something like pasta and tom sauce would be fine, and I doubt they'd even notice lack of meat.

SuzzieScotland · 21/04/2014 17:19

17, you sound like a perfect host!

However I don't expect anyone to cater to my diet, I've always good a bag full of goddies on me.

OP posts:
cakeymccakington · 21/04/2014 17:20

What's not child friendly about a vegan meal?

My son is intolerant to egg/milk and we are veggie so we basically eat vegan now... No reason why kids can't/wouldn't eat food just because it contains no animal products

Hulababy · 21/04/2014 17:21

"It doesn't really compare, if you are vegan."

Unless it is for a medical issue or allergies, than it is still a food choice even if it has moral beliefs behind the choice.

So, if you are unwilling to accommodate someone else's food choices then you should also be happy to accept others may not accommodate yours.

I choose not to eat meat and poultry. When visiting, I would, however, be happy to have just the vegetable/carb element of a meal without the meat.

I do actually tend to serve meat to visiting guests anyway, and I cook meat for DH and DD several times a week. But I would never expect people to go out of their way or to cook something different for me because of my food choices.

TalkinPeace · 21/04/2014 17:22

as a confirmed meat eater YANBU
if they starve to death of a plate of pasta with tomato sauce
or vegetable soup and bread
or vegetable stir fry
or lashings of hummus and pittas
then whatever their dad is feeding them has clearly not left them with enough reserves Grin

MrsCaptainReynolds · 21/04/2014 17:24

I'd be glad you were broadening my DS's food horizons!

NeedsAsockamnesty · 21/04/2014 17:25

I prefer my children to have more meat free days than ones where they have meat.

It's IMO better for them

TheRealYellowWiggle · 21/04/2014 17:27

Hulababy what do you do if it's something like a stew or casserole? Soup made with meat stock? It isn't always possible to just leave out the meat.

LoveBeingCantThinkOfAName · 21/04/2014 17:28

I wouldn't have a problem with it,I fact would you like mine too?

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/04/2014 17:29

Yanbu

I would have replied this earlier but I couldn't find my phone under all the collapsed vegans in the way.

Serve them whatever you have. I love vegan food just had a vegan meal myself and bloody lovely it was!!

Bunbaker · 21/04/2014 17:30

"I'm skint and usually manage 20-30 a day."

20 - 30 adult portions of fruit/veg a day? Really! I physically couldn't eat that much food. I might use 10 - 20 different types of fruit/veg, but I wouldn't class each type as a full portion.

Birdsgottafly · 21/04/2014 17:32

Hula, if you are permanently vegan, then eating animal products (which are in everything), you would end up with an upset stomach and in pain.

Why you would think so little of someone that you would happily have in your house, I don't understand.

Being vegetarian is very different, you can digest animal products already.

So in a way, it does cross medical needs.

What I meant was that most people don't realise what their food contains, or their origins, so few foods are vegan.

It leaves you with a plate of cooked veg.

Whereas the other way round, a meat eater can still be served a flavourful, interesting fully nutritious meal, but be vegan.

Glazing agents and preservatives aren't on most peoples radar as being non vegan/vege.

Aethelfleda · 21/04/2014 17:33

Vegan "not-sausages" and Oven chips with veg and ketchup to dip.

Jacket potatoes with beans and breaded mushrooms

Pasta with vegan pesto and carrot sticks

Mushroom soup with rolls

Corn on the cob and peanut butter sandwiches...

All sounding pretty edible so far.... And that's assuming they don't eat all the regular more "grown-up" vegan food that you seem to be existing on perfectly well....

ExcuseTypos · 21/04/2014 17:35

20-30 different veg /friut a dayShock. What would you actually eat in a typical day Bun and Suzzie? I'm genuinely interested.