To ask MIL to not force dd to call any adult auntie or uncle

[OBface]

My MIL is from a different culture where they call literally any adult auntie or uncle (bus driver, waiter you name it). For DHs sister and brother in law there are 'special' names used rather than auntie etc. Obviously for my family there isn't. AIBU to be cross with my MIL for giving an outright no when I explained nicely to her this morning that I'd rather keep these terms exclusively for family?

I saud up thread that if the dad felt strongly about it then both the parents would have to make a compromise.

I don't despise my ils but I would if they ignored my wishes for my child and actively tried to override what I wanted. As it is, we had some issues in the early days but I made it clear that dh and I would be doing what we felt best and now mil and I have a civilised relationship although we are not close.

If I felt she was constantly undermining me I suspect we would not be seeing much of each other anymore and that isn't in anyone's best interests.

I saud up thread that if the dad felt strongly about it then both the parents would have to make a compromise.

I don't despise my ils but I would if they ignored my wishes for my child and actively tried to override what I wanted. As it is, we had some issues in the early days but I made it clear that dh and I would be doing what we felt best and now mil and I have a civilised relationship although we are not close.

If I felt she was constantly undermining me I suspect we would not be seeing much of each other anymore and that isn't in anyone's best interests.

Interesting. It's not the OP's culture (although I know many people who do it) but it is the OP's dd's culture- or al least half hers, she is going to grow up in both cultures- so needs to learn how to function in both.

Yes, she needs to function in both cultures.

I'm over 40 and still call my parents' friends Uncle Xxx, Aunt Yyy etc. Can't see anything wrong with it. And I manage not to call any Western European person Aunt & Uncle.

OP - Will your MIL and DH be teaching DC their native language? If so, they can address older people however is appropriate in that language without saying the English terms 'Aunt' & 'Uncle" that you find offensive.

I don't like the aunty/uncle thing because I was brought up to think it was common. But my children call their Irish grandparents adult friends aunty/uncle- because they've always been introduced to them that way. No big deal- and I wouldn't dream of telling the grandparents not to. It's none of my business really.