To be annoyed with my dh regarding vaginal abscess? Might be a bit tmi sorry

[MoveYourArmsLikeHenry]

Last year I had the most horrendous 2 weeks caused by an abscess on my vulva. It was agony :( I couldn't walk from the pain and antibiotics didn't take effect until later.

The doctor said it was ready to be drained but there's no point draining it as it will drain naturally very soon and be better for healing if it's left alone. This resulted in the abscess very painfully bursting all over my leg 4 days later and me having to be cleaned by a nurse every day to stop further infection, and for the first few days having to change the gauze every hour because it bled right through. Definitely not better for me :(

Anyway I now have another fucking one:( I am in so much pain, but again they won't drain it :( the doctor said abscesses can be caused by a hair follicle becoming infected, amongst other things.

lying in bed sobbing about how sore it is, dh turns round and says "it's your own fault, you never shave. If you shaved it wouldn't happen"

I am livid. He goes on and on about shaving that area. It's my choice not to and he hates it. Now he's using this as an excuse to torture me about it. :( :(

Doctors tomorrow. They should give you antibiotics
I went to a&e with my last one, was given antibiotics and referred to surgeons in am. They said it "wasn't ready" to drain
About 2hrs later I gave up and drained it myself and the relief was instant
Have a blood sugar check too, that can be related to diabetes

i know how you feel OP you can't understand this pain until you've been through it when i first got Folliculitis i was convinced it was herpes not that i ever slept around or used no protection to get herpes but i automatically thought it was herpes GP didn't help either they said it was herpes and gave me some herpes pills i was mortified not to mention the two ulcers either side of my vagina rubbing against each other everytime i walked. vagisil and the pills made it slightly better and the pills DID get rid of the ulcer's only then did i go to the STD and a nice Jamaican lady doctor examined me and took me symptoms and told me all about Folliculitis and bartholins cysts i was so relieved BUT i still shave and am now obsessed with cleanliness and keeping that area healthy will never recover from what that idiot GP said have you tried cold tea bags on it they are supposed to soothe the pain and help healing and talc works to dry it out and heal too also the dreaded salt baths which sting like hell at first but do wonders for the healing wish you well soon nothing like the pain of a cut of wound on your vag hugs and

He goes on and on about shaving that area. It's my choice not to and he hates it. Now he's using this as an excuse to torture me about it.

Having reread this part of your OP I am calling coercive control especially as he goes on and on about it.

morethan

Poppy seeds

That's it poppy seeds.
When he was drinking this 4 times daily and crunching bloody garlic, bathing in tea tree he kept them at bay. Once he stopped they came back. He has had them for over 20 years now, but had several years of none at all.

He's a prick.

op

I've had Boulin's cysts, and lanced them with a sterilized darning needle after a hot bath.
Your husband needs to realize real grown up women have hair downstairs. Shaving and thongs are unhealthy.

Is he a bit stupid?

Really, what response did he expect to get ?

Hope you're okay op

I also hope your dp has some amazing redeeming features and he's utterly perfect in every other way.

Sadly I doubt it as he's being such an utter dickhead.

Macdoodle I don't really know why I deserved that outburst

I have nothing at all against gps, most of whom do a fantastic job. But in this case the op has been told they have an abscess and to leave it. Hence the advice to see someone who knows what they're talking about, aka a second opinion from another doctor, who can examine it. You will also note I said if it's an abscess it needs drainage which is acknowledgement that it might actually not be. The is no place for conservative treatment of an abscess unless the patient is so very unfit there is no alternative. Of course it could be a more minor soft tissue infection for which this is appropriate which I also said and which is why she needs to see a doctor who can decide

Chip on your shoulder much?

And the op isn't happy with her gp hence advising a and e rather than to go back to her gp. But no, you go right ahead and read the worst into my post then throw the insults if it makes you feel better

Hello OP.

How are you feeling today? please make sure you go to A&E today, even if you see your gp a good one would send you straight away.
Try not to worry, but go as soon as you can.
Best wishes and hope its sorted soon

Hi everyone thanks so much for the replies. Quick update, I went to a and e at 4am when I could no longer stand the pain, and they gave me some painkillers. They have referred me to the gynaecology unit. They may possibly want to drain it or give me antibiotics and see how I go.

I'll just have to wait for the gynacologist to see me and make a decision :( been here for 5 hours and I'm so tired :( have to go into work and everything after as well :(

Good luck.

First deal with the abcess and when you are feeling a bit better have a real think about what sort of person your DH is selfish porn obsessed wanker?

I get cysts occasionally. I do shave (not always, but sometimes) and agree shaving can be a cause.

I tend to 'pop' them myself (as I was advised by a doctor it was perfectly safe to do this). They can be so painful though and I totally understand how your feeling. Embarrassing as much as anything else.

And yes, I too thought they were herpes when I first had one. Was mighty relieved when the doctor reassured me they weren't!

Thank goodness your getting it sorted. Hope your feeling a bit better soon

I'm glad you went OP
and hope you are better soon.
My dh suggested I pm you his details fb and he said only too happy to help.
I said, maybe not a good idea considering where it is. He said well he had an enormous one on his bollocks, so you're even .
he sends his best wishes and knows the pain you are experiencing, his is under the arm at present and he is resisting going in as he has been so many times. Just hoping it drains itself.
Please pm if I can ever help and a big hug for you.

Oh, OP this is all so horrid. Your H sounds like a prize twat.

Just to add to the many posts on this already - I had a problem with infected pubic hair follicles a little while ago, and the GP told me to stop shaving/waxing to get it all to settle down. I did, and it has worked. She said that removing pubic hair is one of the main reasons people get infections in this area. So your H can put that in his pipe and smoke it.

I'm glad you've had some pain relief now - hopefully they can get to the bottom of whats causing the infections.

Don't go to work! Surely you're too ill? Not to mention you've had no sleep.

I had this a few years ago. I was horrified and fascinated at the same time. Pain relief is essential, as are antibiotics. You need a different anti b's once it's burst so make sure you go back.

Don't go to work. I was off for almost three weeks with mine as I could get any trousers on.

They should offer you surgery to remove the follicle to prevent it happening again. I didn't have it so it flares up from time to time. I will go for it if happens again which is likely apparently.

Your H is being a dick.

Is there some way you could engineer a situation so it pops in your husband's face? That's about hwat he deserves for his horrid comments.

So sorry you're in so much pain OP, I hope the gyn can sort it out for you. Anyway you can call into work?

If it's a bartholin gland abscess then antibiotics will do nothing for it, it needs draining and possibly a procedure known as marsupialisation. I've had a long and extremely painful history with those things. And hair is neither here nor there. Your husband is a cock.

Your DH is a bloody nob.

Am sorry you are in pain, hope you feel better soon x