To be shocked at neighbour??

[DomesticDisgrace]

I was having a very rare chat with my downstairs neighbour, I'm in a duplex and she's in a flat underneath with her front door under the stairs to my place. Two very separate buildings really and you can hear absolutely nothing from one to the other.
We were talking about ovens and I was saying I'm a pretty useless cook but really been trying this year, something was said about what shelf is best and she said "because heat rises", at this stage DD was getting impatient and I just made a stupid joke about how that'll come in handy for me next winter (given that she lives underneath), not even true because I had my heating on loads this winter and I only said it out of silliness.

Well I've just gotten a text from her saying "Domestic, I've been thinking after our discussion earlier and I'm feeling a little hard done by if I'm honest. Perhaps we could have a chat later on and come up with the fairest way of dealing with the issue regarding heating"

What the actual fuck, I don't know what to say back but I really can't afford to pay her for having her heat on just because heat rises??

Wtf? 'If you think that's fair' - like she doesn't. 'Not worth the squabble' umm I'm not going to argue over your bonkers idea, I know of not one upstairs dweller who bungs their downstairs neighbour a few quid for heating. She doesn't sound convinced but like she's graciously conceding. What a twat.

Maybe so.

I find it odd, TBH.

Jenny Hahaha, laughing through the rage!

Seriously what a bitch, she knows I'm embarrassed not to be working as it's the first time in my adult life but my only other options are really low paid jobs that would barely cover childcare and that I don't even have a place for DD till July. That wasn't being nice at all!

So much for timid and being afraid I'd embarrassed her!

Maybe it would be better to talk face to face if you want to feel that it had been resolved.

OMG that's crazy OP.

Its the same kind of crazy as when the ex girlfriend of my ex flatmate 3 years after he moved out tried to get me to pay the £800 debt he had run up for gas and electricity in his name for doing a runner that I had already paid my share of! I had exactly the same gobsmacked reaction.

JennyBendy - That made me choke on my rich tea biscuit

That reply would piss me right off, and have me lying awake in the wee small hours planning how I could force her to see my point of view.

Wow, just wow

Just when you think the world can't get any odder, along comes this thread

that warrants no response.

i would steer well clear from now on. and also - NO JOKES!

I wouldn't reply again OP.

She's going to go back to work, complain to her colleagues about you benefiting from her heating and they are either going to laugh at her and tell her how daft she is being or sympathise and convince her to put tin foil on her ceiling to stop the heat getting to you.

Something tells me you are going to have bigger issues with her than this in the future, so good luck with those. Don't forget to update us as they happen.

When we lived in a similar sounding building our downstairs neighbour claimed to be able to hear our fish swimming. Kept them awake at night, splashy little buggers.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! She's bonkers as conkers!

Wait til summer and then text "Hiya - gosh its hot isn't it? I'm having to run three fans to keep cool! Since your rising heat obviously makes it worse I thought maybe you could chip in a few pounds towards my electricity bill?"

I've got little bubbles of rage in my tummy the more I think about it.
Definitely best ignored I think but there are going to be many insanely passive aggressive arguments with her in my head!

Oh my! I wouldn't respond either, she's not in the realms of the rational is she?

She sounds like one of those people who take everything absolutely literally. Some people with ASD find humour incredibly hard to comprehend. I think there are a lot of adults who are undiagnosed ASD, many of them were the nerds and geeks at school.

Crying laughing. I'd be setting my demon child on her.

Noisy fish

This is BY FAR the funniest thing I have read in a while. Please don't waste anymore time on her, she is obviously a penny short!

I bet you have - how utterly frustrating! Whenever I'm in that position (i.e. dealing with someone who it would actually cause me more hassle to engage with than ignore even though I know I am morally right ) I write a huge letter on my laptop to the miscreant, detailing every single thing that's wrong with their argument, and every single thing that's wrong with them, then I save it, and close it, and forget about it. The good thing about that is that if I then think of other things to rant at them about, I can go back and add to it!

our downstairs neighbour claimed to be able to hear our fish swimming. Kept them awake at night, splashy little buggers."

That's hilarious, Sarah

Warning. Totally unnecessary and inaccurate Internets diagnosis.

Hmm. I reckon she sounds like she could be on the spectrum. Socially awkward, takes things literally, you think she's 'a little bit peculiar'.

If so, I really doubt she meant that text in the way you read it.

Good grief.

Or she could just be one half of sarahandfucks previous neighbours.

'Splashy little buggers'

I think the only sensible answer possibly is "of course it is fair, we live in two separate self contained units, and not a flat share!"

And dont make any more jokes.

Fair? Fair??? Someone please call the Large Haldron Collider and tell it that physics is mean, unfair and won't play nicely and ask it to have a word.

"There's nothing to squabble over. Your heating is nothing to do with me."