to wonder why it seems people get increasingly negative about breastfeeding the older baby gets....

[DiplodocusDinosaur]

My ds2 is 9 mths, admittedly he is a very big baby and often mistaken for 1yr to 18mths. I bf on demand and have always happily, discreetly fed in public. Whereas when he was little I.e. under 6 mths I only ever got really positive comments and vibes for bf in public, now he is getting older I'm increasingly noticing negative looks and had the odd comment more than once. Today I took my ds1 and ds2 to a childrens farm, ds2 wanted a feed so I went to feed him and heard two mothers giggling and saying 'bitty, bitty'. And a week or so back another lady stopped in the country park I was in and told me ds2 was far to old for breast milk and it was fine for little babies to be bf in public but my baby was old enough to learn to wait.
Have i just had a couple of bad run ins or have others noticed bf reactions change as babies get older?

No you see it as a big public display, and what exactly are they doing to make a display? I doubt they are jumping up and down shouting about it!

Why should they go somewhere private? What is it about bfeeding that makes you think it should be hidden away? And as I said many feeding rooms are not pleasant.

If I went away to a feeding room each time my babies had wanted fed some days I would have got nothing done.

You are the one projecting that women are being militant and making a display, they are just feeding their babies.

And yes ds1 would have minded, he needles feed had I had to go get the key from the linen department and then go down three floors to the feeding room he would have screamed. As it was he began fussing, there was a chair nearby so I sat on it and fed him whilst my friend who was with me looked at the beds which is why we were in the bed department. Incidentally my friend is male and had no children, he still realised ds1 needed Fed and would rather I did that than have him scream.

Exactly Suffolk who wants to sit next to a stinky nappy bin.

Incidentally ds1 is now 14 and I just asked his opinion on bfeeding in public, he looked baffled and said why would it be a problem. Babies need to be fed.

Purple you are revealing yourself to be so deeply ignorant and I'll informed. You 'don't agree' with babies being fed in the biologically optimal way??

There is something deeply wrong with out society if people are offended by a baby being fed the way nature intended when all over the place we see breasts portrayed in an objectified and sexualised way and no one bats an eyelid. On my drive to work for the past few years I have passed a billboard advertising a sex shop. You can see more of the models breasts than anyone has ever seen of mine when I've been bf in public.

I cannot Believe we are even still having this debate. What's more concerning is the fact, for example that young boys and girls are accessing hardcore porn on their mobiles and that is how they are learning about sex and relationships. That's what we should be protesting in the streets about, not the right to bf in public and it makes me so sad that such protests are needed at all.

Sigh. It's not about 'hiding away'. As I've said, I managed to enjoy breastfeeding without once doing it in a place that could have caused offence to someone else. That's my point. Don't think I ever had to breastfeed next to a stinky nappy bin!

I just find it odd that myself, and several friends managed to breastfeed without it turning into a debacle, yet apparently we are supposed to just feed wherever and whenever the hell we choose because otherwise we're just not doing it properly It is possible to breastfeed in private places you know??

You're the friggin debacle ffs

Why should we do it in private? And going somewhere private is fine if you want to, but you don't have to and it's not always practical anyway.

Its great the places you chose to feed weren't smelly but all the feeding rooms in my town are also the nappy change room, they are often busy and yes smelly.

I never said you were doing it wrong, if you chose to feed somewhere privately that is fine but not everyone wants to and why should they?

What is it about bfeeding that makes it something that must be done privately?

Because when you don't go do it privately you clearly are an exhibistionist who wants to flaunt their boobies in everyones face and make a scene of yourself.

Get a fucking grip.

I can see exactly what purplebaubles is saying - yes, breastfeeding is perfectly natural etc, but that doesn't mean that breastfeeding mothers should completely disregard the fact that they may make other people extremely uncomfortable just because they see it as their right to bf wherever they want to.

A bfeeding mother isn't making people uncomfortable, she is doing what is necessary. If someone is uncomfortable or offended they can choose not to look or to move, but I suggest they examine why they feel so uncomfortable and deal with that.

How do you know a bfing mother isn't making someone uncomfortable? You can't make such sweeping generalisations. My dad is 90 years old, he is a different generation with different values, he is bloody uncomfortable about it. Why should he move because someone has chosen to sit next to him and make him feel that way?

Purple I can't work out how a woman responding to her child is doing something all about her? I can't see how your wish to go somewhere you deemed appropriate reflects anything other than your personal feelings which you could share with us generously without projecting them onto mothers who feel differently from you.

If your brother shares your squeamishness it is essentially his problem and no one need justify why they might feed in a department store as they are doing nothing at all unreasonable. Fortuitously the law and most public opinion recognises this, bf is normal with no distinction between babies and children.

www.buzzfeed.com/southerndisposition/25-historical-images-that-normalize-breastfeeding-jlw6

You may have seen these already? We are all products of our culture and society, these images give a nice riposte to people who presume our current legal protection and liberal society allow unprecedented levels of public bf. For these women, like me and most we are just cracking on with our day- the feeding is the background rhythm. I feed where ever because I have no wish to do anything else although I also have no time to do anything else, no wish to remove myself from work, society and the content of my day by self imposed isolation.

They haven't made him feel that way, I know plenty of elderly people who have no issues. If a wOman sits down in a public space she is legally allowed to be then she can bfeed.

In the majority of cases you can't tell a woman is feeding. Fgs you see more boon on lingerie adverts or perfume adverts, and then there is p 3 etc.

Is your dad offended by all those things? Or just women feeding babies.

The irony of living in a society where the media is flooded with sexualized images of women... All fine, but a woman feeds a baby and people get offended.

If you're EXTREMELY uncomfortable being in the proximity of a child breastfeeding then you've got issues mate.

Issues which no mum should be having to bother about.

It is their right Megrim, it is that simple. Age is pretty irrelevant tbh, lots of older men find it normal. A few of the very supportive public comments I have had directed at me were from old men. A this thread shows any age or gender can be limited in their tolerance of normality. Old men are in no greater need of consideration than children or women, it is patronising to suggest otherwise.

Aye, exactly, have a woman sit near someone with a low cut top on and you'll be seeing more boob than a mum breastfeeding.

Think about one is acceptable to so many but the other is not. It's fucked up.

Fucked up I tell thee!

IceBeing, I've asked a breastfeeding counsellor friend to give me some info I can print off that's evidence based and will bring it up at our next meeting.

I don't want to challenge her privately for fear of repercussions but will try and do it in an informative way in front of other professionals. That way it'll also be minuted and on the record and hopefully might filter through.

I'll be darned if they start using breastfeeding as a stick to beat me with when they can't find anything else.

Funnily enough I never feel like I can feed my toddler in public now, which causes a lot of tantrums because I'm denying him comfort. I can see the heartache and rejection in his face and wonder how that is any less emotionally damaging than the situation that got the social worker involved in the first place.

At 17 months he doesn't understand waiting. All he sees is that mummy used to always let him feed and now she's rejecting him. :-(

It's nothing to do with sexualisation, or being fucked up, it's to do with a bit of common courtesy towards others. I'm sure my dad would be equally uncomfortable if a female dressed only in scanty underwear sat next to him in the M&S cafe. Or if a bloke in Speedos sat next to him for that matter.

It's not fucked up, it's just a different point of view from your own.

BTW I said inappropiate to the swimming pool scenario as if you are wearing only a swimming suit you can hardly cover up can you

Believe it or not, I don't want anyone seeing my tits when I'm feeding either so try to be extremely discreet.
Why are people so uncomfortable with seeing breastfeeding? Often seems to be women who feel this way. Jealousy? Inadequacy?