wibu to stop and give out to this woman

[spongebob13]

coming home last night from late night shopping on a dark windy country road and only for a car coming against me, with their headlights I spotted last second a woman walking in the dark in black. I swerved to avoid her and braked and the other car passed. I came to a stop. my heart was thumping and was shaking and i was so mad. I reversed and rolled down window. she stopped and looked in at me as if i was looking for directions not a bother on her. I said exactly "jesus Christ I nearly hit you. you are all in black! are you mad?" she said "what?" I said "I couldn't see you and it would be my fault if I hit you! " she said "fuck off" and walked on. I was in shock. haven't stopped thinking about it since. I swear if I knew who she was I'd report her but for what law she is breaking I don't know! selfish bint!

[LessMissAbs]

Are you insane? Who knows why she was there? Her car could have broken down (do you carry hi-viz with you in yours?), she could have had a falling out with someone, she could have been lost, and some nutter harridan stops to scream and shout at her?

Hope she reports you to the police from your registration details.

[JazzyCardi]

Logg1le, no, it happened to me too. My circumstances were I had just moved to the country and I had no idea that it could ever be absolutely pitch black outside. No ambient lighting from homes/late night shops and no street lights. Plus no designated path to walk on.

I was lucky that I could phone somebody to pick me up.

[zeno]

A person walking on a country road in the dark with no light showing or bright/reflective clothing, who doesn't get in the hedge when a car is passing, has clearly not thought things through. It's bad enough in the daylight. Saying she had every right to be there is ridiculous - she was putting herself in a very dangerous situation.

That said, the shouting was not good. In the same circs I have always stopped and asked if they realise how invisible they are, and offered a lift onwards to safer climes. Often it's been a tourist or similar who didn't have the experience to know it was daft as he'll and likely to get them hurt. I hope if I did something equally daft in a city that someone would help me out.

And I fucking hate people who text whilst driving. I go past a memorial most days to a 16 year old girl, dead for that reason. Stop doing it, you moron!

[JumpingJackSprat]

Until you have been there then I don't think it's possible to appreciate how much a fright it can be when you come up someone completely unexpectedly. I have had this before, driving on a 60 Road I would have been doing no more than 40mph with fully functioning lights and high hedges on both sides of the road -suddenly see a face looming out of the darkness. Woman wearing black and on my side of the road. Bloody terrifying there was no way I could have seen her until itwas too late. Thing is pedestrians do have a duty of care as well - for instance if you step into the road when there's a car oncoming, or are on your phone, you would probably be found partly or wholly liable in the event of an incident. I don't see why it would necessarily be didn't for not making yourself as visible as you can.

[RiverTam]

don't know about pedestrians (I'm in London so pretty much always pavements) but I have nearly hit cyclists a number of times and it makes me so angry - all in black, no hi vis, no lights, hoodie up - I know it would be their stupid fucking fault if I hit them but that wouldn't stop me feeling totally wretched about it, and it gives me a fright every time. And what do you get from them? A load of attitude. Selfish fucks, the lot of them.



you're a knob OP for texting whilst driving, my sympathies disappeared at that point.

[OlympiaFox]

Obviously it was a frightening experience for you but I think you handled it badly. It would have been more effective to calmly explain that you nearly ran her over because you couldn't see her. Her reaction to you was understandable as all she heard was a crazy stranger yelling at her for walking on the road, she probably still has no idea how invisible she was. So 'giving out' was pointless.

[winterkills]

You reversed on a dangerous country road in the dark so you could harangue a pedestrian and you think she was unreasonable??

[Logg1e]

She wasn't texting this time MrsDeVere it was the pedestrian who was breaking the pretend law.

[canyou]

OP I had what I can only describe as a near miss about 6 weeks ago on a dark windy country bog road I saw the man at the last minute I got such a fright I stopped the car got out and practicallty threw the torch an a high viz from the boot of the car at him all the while mutterong and mubling about inconsiderate and unsafe road users But I have passed him a few nights since and he still has the high viz and torch I even got him a pint in the local to make up for being so

[LessMissAbs]

Honestly can't believe this or how many people are sitting around saying "well done". You're kind of the opposite of the good Samaritan, aren't you OP. If you were that concerned, do something useful. Phone the police, or you could have offered her a lift, or asked her if she was all right.

It was bloody lucky some other innocent driver didn't come along and hit your car as you were reversing in a temper along a dark country lane. Honestly, I think your actions were utterly appalling.

This has to be a wind up. The bit about texting while driving and reversing in the dark on a narrow road and shouting at women out on their own, I hope this gives you whatever kind of power kick or recognition you're looking for OP.

[canyou]

I also meant to say it happens to a lot of drivers and is ofter a reminder /lesson to expect the unexpected. I did love the Irish RSA film for pedestrians anout their personal responsibility

[spongebob13]

guess i was bu. good debate though. some points to ponder (and yes i am an idiot to text while driving, agreed).

[Pipbin]

You were texting while driving?
Well you can fuck off pulling anyone else up on their behaviour then.

[Logg1e]

OP shared the fact that she wasn't texting as evidence if her reasonableness.

[winterkills]

Yes, definitely some points to ponder there op:

Breaking the law by speeding
Breaking the law by texting while driving
Breaking the law by dangerous driving
Anger management issues

Should be enough to keep you out of mischief

[Susyb30]

You text whilst driving and admit to speeding..god I hope I never come across you in your car when im driving with my son in the car..so wrong. You had my sympathy but you are insane yourself. What a cheek you have slating that woman when in actual fact you could be responsible for causing a serious accident. .killing someone even. Yes pedestrian was a silly cow for wearing black..but you really need to think about what a danger you are to other people. Are you reckless like that when you have your own children in your car?

[nennypops]

If she was walking towards you then, unless she was wearing a balaclava, you should have been able to see her face. If you couldn't, you weren't paying attention and/or were driving too fast and/or had something wrong with your lights.

[VivaLeBeaver]

A car hit a pedestrian in very similar circumstances near me a few years ago. Pedestrian was killed. The driver wasnt prosecuted. Newspaper reports and police quotes very much blamed the pedestrian, walking in the dark on a road with no street lights, wearing black. They said the driver couldn't be expected to see him in time.

[comedycentral]

Poor woman, I bet she was so shaken up after what you did to her. What a horrible, self absorbed person you are.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

It terrifies me, the number of pedestrians and cyclists I see, when I am out in the car, who are well-nigh invisible. I do my best to drive safely, and if I see a cyclist or pedestrian, I will give them plenty of space and slow down as I pass them - then if they fall, or swerve or whatever, I will have the best chance possible of avoiding them.

If they are all in dark clothing, I may not see them until it is too late for me to pass them in that safe manner. I want to pass pedestrians and cyclists safely, and I assume they want the same - I will do all in my power to achieve this, and I think it is not unreasonable to want them to contribute to ensuring their safety by wearing something hi-viz. It could be as simple as a strap around their arm (something pretty small that could live in a pocket or the bottom of a handbag, when not needed) - is that an unreasonable thing to want?

If I cannot see someone, how am I supposed to avoid them? Crystal ball? The power to see into the future?

All three dses have or had paper rounds, and in the winter, they had to do them in the dark. We told them to use lights and hi viz clothing, to make themselves as visible as possible. They can't make all drivers into safe drivers, so they should control the things they can control - by making themselves as visible as possible.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

I wouldn't have stopped on the road, as the OP did, and I am sure the woman was scared and upset by her. But maybe she will go home and think about making herself more visible at night. She could have been knocked down and hurt or worse, devastating so many lives.

Preventing that kind of pain is a good thing, surely?

[Logg1e]

SDT where do you stand on stopping and reversing on a bad road in order to give a stranger an earful? How about texting whilst driving? Or breaking the speed limit?

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

I wouldn't do any of those, Logg1e. Does that help?