To think some of you spend far too much time on Mumsnet and I feel sorry for your children

[HoneyDragon]

It's been one of those weekends on here. I wanted to get in with this one first, before someone else did.

I haven't even seen my DD since Saturday and won't see her till Tuesday. I don't know exactly where she is, (only that it's somewhere in Paris), or who she is with, either, She may be alone for all I know. Should I feel guilty?

The DCs are being brought up by Mike the Knight, while I'm on here.

The shame.

My DS is lying being pathetic on the sofa being entertained by Mister Maker. Poor thing has a fluey type bug...the only parenting currently needed is to plump his pillow now and again and get the calpol in the mouth every 4-6 hours.

Bliss!

Apparently I have a job. The house is in the same state it always is. a feckin midden

Anyway honey, apart from the GF what did I miss. (That WAS fun by the way)

ds24, at work, ds23, at uni, dd15, school dd14, at school.

the house is shit and pile of ironing but it's my day off so fuck it.

DS is being babysat by Dr who. He's got a cold and its the only way to get him to recuperate and stay sat on his arse.

I'm rocking newborn DS as I type this and polishing my halo.

I'm entitled to my mumsnetting time, I've already done the laundry, put an asda order through, built a Lego structure with DS and covered him in a liberal amount of vaporub. I'm not defensive at all.

im at work its very quiet and im sneaking dairy milk at the same time. might pop to waitrose in a bit for free coffee.

no housework all done before i left for work.

I'm in A&E with DD1. Mumsnet is my comfort food when I'm on diet

I've done my ironing and taken DS1 a cup of tea (he's poorly).

I'm free to MN and look at holidays all day!

Kids? Kids? What kids?

Shiiiiiiiittttt!

Kids at school and housework done so stick that in your pipe and smoke it!

If I hadn't allowed my DD to watch so much Dora she would never have been able to order my drinks at the bar on holiday

I'd at school. Dh at work. Washing machine going second time today. First load on the line. Trying to clean the lounge but not really trying very hard. Feel sorry for the cat, every time she sits on me I get up to do something!

I'm constantly amazed that, somehow, mine have managed to get to adulthood without being maimed/killed.

I should get an award or something.

I'm constantly amazed that, somehow, mine have managed to get to adulthood without being maimed/killed.

Yeah, me too - well mine are 12 and 9 so still a while to go yet, but we've got this far without so much as a trip to A&E

DS30 at work, DSD23 at uni, DH in his office working, I'm in my office working
My hoover is broken and my new one can't be collected from Tesco till tomorrow so I can't possibly do anything else.....

....drums fingers...mumsnets.....oooh pinterest...

The DC are at school, washing machine is on, housework done, costumes, 20 masks and craft stuff for Rainbows tomorrow and costumes for world book day are completely finished, I've been shopping and the dog is asleep on my feet, so it's only my uni work I'm neglecting and really I'm doing my tutor a favour by not making her read that crap.

Well, I'm letching researching the Musketeers on the Telly Addicts thread, much more interesting than boring college work. I wonder if I could get a qualification in that, I seem to be much more adept.

Don't worry the older one is babysitting, she is 6 after all. I just throw them a couple of fruit shoots and some crisps every now and then.

This thread has made me so sad

Ah, I see.

Well, I am neglecting my DCs because I am one of those terrible parents who use school as childcare.

I have zero housework standards, thank fuck.

Swearing- well. Who cares? Personally I hate it when people use stupid little s instead of actually writing the word.
In fact, I don't get that at all. Clearly you are thinking fucking arsehole. So why act all shy and put fing ar*le?

Anyway. Children happily neglected. Work also neglected whilst I am on here. House is chaos but everyone has clean school uniform so that's a tick for me.

Mine are not here most of the time.

Still the house is neglected.