To feel upset, judged and embarrassed about incident today

[FeelingEmbarrassed]

Just came home from a walk around town and whilst I was in boots with my 3 month old DD on her pram I bought a few bits. On my way out the security guard stopped me and asked me to come back in to store as he wanted to talk to me. At first I thought it was a con or scam of some sort as I'm a bit wary in weird situations but he had ID so I followed him back in, feeling worried and anxious about what he was going to say. He took me in office and said that he hadn't told manager or called police and did I want to just return the items i had stolen and leave. I was so shocked and being a new mum I'm full of emotion and hormonal so I started to well up and ask what he meant as I hadn't taken anything! He said that he hadn't seen or followed me but a woman reported to him that I'd put something In my baby changing bag under my pram! ( I hadn't at all of course but I did reach down to get my purse out from the bag, the only time I can assume she thought if taken something). I showed him my bag, he also asked me to undo my prams wind shield where my baby was sleeping to see I hadn't put anything there. He was happy I hadn't and he apologised and then I walked out in tears.
I don't know why but I felt judged by woman who was probably just doing what she thought was right thing but as a new mum I feel lacking in confidence about how I look and I felt rough today with poor sleep so that didn't help but I just felt embarrassed and totally upset by it.
Have you ever been accused of stealing and how did you react? Am I being over sensitive or am I right to be upset? Ruined my really good day up until then.
Sorry for long story and rant!

Pigsmummy Did you read that parts where the security guard broke all the rules in the book?

• didn't see the offence & isn't allowed to take a 3rd parties word that said offence has been committed
• didn't call for a female member of staff to be present
• didn't call the manager/police when he should have

What part of that makes it ok!?

YANBU, OP. That sounds like a horrible experience.

I agree with other posters that the security guards behaviour was appalling. I would be complaining to boots and reporting the incident to the police.

Hope you are feeling better today

I think you should complain.

I've come close to walking out of a shop with goods in my hand/buggy etc a couple of times and don't sneak back ...why do you need to? - you've made a mistake and a shoplifter wouldn't be going back...and you aren't concealing them!
I got funny looks the other day in the local shop - I always take a bag and put it in a basket - this time I forgot the basket and just started putting my milk etc in the bag then realised what I was doing because the (newish) manager was staring at me (didn't say anything)... at the till (usual person) I said sorry I wasn't thinking and he laughed and said lots of people do it all the time and the manager is from a store in a bigger/less honest area and can't get his head round it!

And I've set the alarms off more than once - in our local B&Q it seems to go off randomly for everyone - they tend not to even stop people...
The only time I've been made to feel really uncomfortable is when I bought a Cd player from not my usual Tescos using the self service till - it just let me pay and go so I thought it must be automatically deactivated. I set the alarm off, the security guard came up -flashed him the receipt and bag and he waved me through ...setting the alarm off again. When I got home I found the tag - a plastic disc thing - in the box...not knowing what to do with it thought I'd take it back and they could reuse it ...I put it in a shopping bag and forgot about it ...
A while later walking into my usual Tesco's I set the alarm off...remembered and dug it out to give to the security guard (who I recognised - probably mutual - DD1 was a wanderer and I frequently 'lost' her, especially in Tescos and had had dealings with him a few times). I explained and he looked disapproving - not sure if with the guard from the other branch or with me ...anyway after that I was really conscious of the fact he seemed to be watching me - thought maybe he thought DD1's antics were a distraction (if only!) or I had been trying to smuggle a tag in for some reason ...in the end that was one reason I started going to the other branch instead (also they refurbed that one and I couldn't find anything anymore)

Didnt notice the bit about him taking you to the office alone , that is seriously out of order and even if his intentions were innocent , he has placed himself in a very risky posistion . Definately complain .

unlucky83 that's exactly the type of tag I meant on certain goods from HMV. Have discovered security guards who actually know what they're doing know about them. One in M&S cut it off for me and when it happened in Waterstones once , which is next door to HMV, their assistant asked have you just come from next door, happens all the time.

Thanks all I have decided to write a complaint letter and I shall post if any outcome. I do feel better in myself today but just a bit angry that I was made to feel that way

Catkins He's either a power-tripper and he's done this before, and/or he's caught shoplifters before and has created a situation where he can extract 'favours' in return for letting them off

There has to be that suspicion. I would write a reasonably threatening letter, asking for an explanation.

That's awful.

I would be very upset, too - postnatal or not.

You are innocent, so at least you can hold your head up. Hope it doesn't affect you too much.

Not surprised you are upset, I would be too. I suppose the security guard was trying to be sympathetic with a new mum when he offered to let you put stuff back but he was in the wrong accusing you in the first place.