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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is utter bollocks.

51 replies

Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:29

"Ladies if your child's father is emotionally, physically or financially available to their child, you are not a single mother you are a single woman."

I have just seen a nobhead on my Facebook post this. I think it is the OR that annoys me the most. Apparently this is "so true" and 14 people have liked it. Hmm

I am not a single mother, so you may feel its not my place to comment on this, but I think it's bloody ridiculous. Aibu?

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 22/02/2014 08:30

I don't understand what it's trying to say and I'm a single mother!

JazzAnnNonMouse · 22/02/2014 08:30

They're both

RedHelenB · 22/02/2014 08:31

Hang on - does it mean that the dad should be stepping up?

JazzAnnNonMouse · 22/02/2014 08:31

Aren't they?
I'm not really sure what it's trying to say either

Mumof3xx · 22/02/2014 08:31

Are the 14 people men?

RedHelenB · 22/02/2014 08:32

No it doesn't mean that - still confused!

Original poster
Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:33

Surely you are a single mother if you do not live with the dad? You are solely responsible for the children unless they are with their dad. That is a single parent to me!

3 of the people who have liked it are women, the rest are men.

OP posts:
MorrisZapp · 22/02/2014 08:34

Ok, I think I get this. It's a father, saying that his ex isn't a 'single parent' because he is involved with supporting and caring for the kids.

My brother is in this position so I can see it from that side. Maybe it's odd to see your ex describe herself as a single parent when you're still as involved and responsible as you ever were. It sounds like your kids only have one parent.

But ultimately, single parents are people who are single, and parents. So it's a fair enough description.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 22/02/2014 08:35

Basically saying that if the dad is contributing to the kid/s in any way then single mothers can't say they are single mothers. Hmm

Original poster
Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:35

It's saying that even if you dont live with the dad, as long as he is doing one of these things, you don't count as a single mother! Hmm

It's a wanky picture thing!

OP posts:
BakeOff · 22/02/2014 08:36

So if a father is "emotionally available" to his child (whatever that means) but offers no physical or financial support then the mother shouldn't consider herself to be a single mother?

FunkyBarnYard · 22/02/2014 08:37

It means if the father is around in one of Those capacities you aren't doing it on your own.... I've had this said to my face Hmm

BakeOff · 22/02/2014 08:37

And I hate wanky pictures. People 'like' them without even thinking about what the text actually means, it seems.

Original poster
Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:37

Bakes that is why the or pisses me off so much!!

OP posts:
LettertoHermioneGranger · 22/02/2014 08:38

How strange. It just doesn't make sense. You're both. A single woman, and a mother, a mother who is single. It might as well say a mother isn't a woman. Such a nonsense status.

The best I could come up with to have it make sense is if said you're not a sole parent, you're a single mother/woman? I'm just grasping at straws.

Anyway, YANBU. I would unfriend for such a status if they aren't someone close.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 22/02/2014 08:39

For what it's worth my husband shares everything to d with my DSS' 50/50 with his ex and he would not be offended if she refers to herself as a single mother. She is single and a mother.

Susyb30 · 22/02/2014 08:39

I agree what bollocks. The fact that it says "or" so you could have a guy who only pays maintenance and doesn't see his child, so your not a single mother then..er I don't think so! Must be a man or someone who doesn't have kids.

SamHamwidge · 22/02/2014 08:40

Goady bollocks . YANBU

NaffOrf · 22/02/2014 08:40

Anything on FB that starts with 'Ladies...' is automatically bollocks. YANBU.

TheGirlFromIpanema · 22/02/2014 08:40

Agreee.

Tis wanky in the extreme.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 22/02/2014 08:40

everything to do*

LettertoHermioneGranger · 22/02/2014 08:41

Oh and I just caught the "or"! Unfriend I say!

Monetbyhimself · 22/02/2014 08:41

YANBU. Is he also the owner of a Batman Suit ? Does he climb tall buildings at weekends ?

Delete and block. It's better for your blood pressure Grin

Original poster
Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:42

I can't unfriend as he is a friend of the family, but this is the last straw in a long run of goady wanky bollocks. He is being hidden from my timeline for the good of my blood pressure

OP posts:
Original poster
Koothrapanties · 22/02/2014 08:45

Monet, no batman suit and to give him credit he is a committed dad. However, he is one of the thoughtless twats who posts nasty things about the poor souls who commit suicide on the railway line and dare to disrupt his commute to work.

OP posts:
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