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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my cats now the baby's here?

374 replies

elliebe13 · 13/02/2014 11:37

2 years ago I really wanted a baby but my husband thought it was too soon so got me a cat instead. She's the gentlest, sweetest cat there is. A year later my friend found a box of abandoned kittens and we took one in. I put all my effort into her and lavished love on her but she's just a grumpy, horrible cat who steals my other cat's food, fights with her and leaves white hair everywhere. She doesn't even like to be stroked. Sometimes she just poops next to the litterbox.

I became really freakish about cleanliness during pregnancy and they're banned from our bedroom and the baby's room. They're both treated for fleas but I still find them on my baby's face occasionally.

I thought my hatred for them would disappear when the baby came but I just really resent them, no matter how much I clean there's hair and dander everywhere, we don't have much space or money really and it's hard to find a decent rented flat for pets.

The second cat needs to go as I am miserable and dreading when the baby starts crawling. I had guests over last night and my friend's coat was just covered with this white hair.

I am going out of my mind. I thought I was an animal lover but I guess I'm not :(

OP posts:
ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 13/02/2014 16:41

Oh the irony of your last post.

aderynlas · 13/02/2014 16:42

Just wanted to say we tried lots of things for fleas in the house op. Get some indorex spray from amazon, worked a treat. Sorry you are getting some uncalled for replies and good luck .

Cravey · 13/02/2014 16:43

Yes hop along it was ironic wasn't it ? Flea ridden things they are. Well they seem to be in the op case !!!

Lizzylou · 13/02/2014 16:44

OP, your first mistake was posting this in AIBU.
It seems to be populated by people with no actual constructive advice, just nastiness and a mean demeanour. Not looking at anyone in particular.
But Cravey, really, is there any need? Do you feel better about yourself now?

DanceParty · 13/02/2014 16:47

elliebe13 Thu 13-Feb-14 16:17:26 Cat no. 1 I meant. As for the fleas I do treat them every 4 weeks and I've done the house before it's just chemicals around my son I do not like.

Well, you aren't going to get rid of fleas any other way. I suggest you get someone to take your son out of the house, spray the house, then stay out of the house for the day. When you come back, job done.

SlightlyDampWellies · 13/02/2014 16:47

Fleas have been shocking this past year. we are using indorex, which says it lasts for about 6 months, but also we are doing it at least monthly. (Have to again actually).

SanctiMoanyArse · 13/02/2014 16:48

I doubt cat 1 is truly feral, it's be nowhere near you if it were. Semi or farm cat quite possibly, feral no. I recently read something about ferals not being exposed to human care before 7 weeks being impossible to handle after.

I don't suppose you are near cardiff or Newport or we'd help out.

greenhill · 13/02/2014 16:48

elliebe I completely understand about being concerned about strong chemicals around your baby. As long as your home is aired thoroughly after fumigation / spraying the chemicals will be in the carpet, not in the air.

Is your DS crawling yet? Maybe have some blankets for him to lie on rather than being directly on the carpet, after your flat is treated.

Cravey · 13/02/2014 16:49

Lizzylou. I feel fantastic. Thanks for asking.

peachactiviaminge · 13/02/2014 16:49

What a bunch of idiots there are on this thread.

LIFE IS NOT FUCKING DISPOSABKE. JUST BECAUSE ITS LESS INTELLIGENT DOESNT MEAN IT MATTERS LESS.

I hope a !of of you never own pets. They love us unconditionally as we should love them. Fucking heart breaking the cruelty on here.

Cravey I imagine a lot of animals lovers feel the same about you and your shitty little attitude.

Cravey · 13/02/2014 16:51

Peach. Do explain. You were coming across as slightly irrational there. I'm advocating for the cat here love ! So the animal lovers brigade should bloody love me.

Elsiequadrille · 13/02/2014 16:52

You also notice an absence of moths, spiders and other creatures after using the Indorex. We spray house annually (and use Frontline), but have only house cats.

Original poster
elliebe13 · 13/02/2014 16:52

I am actually in Cardiff but I wouldn't want anybody to feel like they had to take her. I think the lovely people on this thread have balanced out the horrible Smile

OP posts:
peachactiviaminge · 13/02/2014 16:54

Oh ffs got myself so wound up I fucked up UNs. I am sorry Cravey I'm not usually such a deranged twat.

Lizzylou · 13/02/2014 16:56

Peach, I think most people are advocating a path that will be best for both OP and both cats. Truly.

Cravey, glad to hear it, says a lot. Can I ask why you have been bothered to post on this thread? What is is giving you, you already admitted you hate cats, I really can't understand where you are coming from?!

DuskAndShiver · 13/02/2014 16:56

YANBU.
Cats are not people. They are not as important. They are not as important as any humans, but certainly not as important as your own baby is (to you).
If you feel that the cats are compromising your baby's well being (and they are, with fleas and shit) it is completely fine to feel upset by that and put your baby first.

Ignore the people who are being mean to you about these feelings. Are they all vegetarians? Do any of them eat cows, pigs, lambs, or use their milk? If so then all this is sentimental bullshit. Don't take any of this "part of the family" bullshit from people who eat ham sandwiches while wearing leather shoes. (If a vegan says it, you can still disagree but at least they have consistency and are making some kind of sense)

If there were any point in raking over the past (there is not) I would say maybe you should not have got a cat if you really wanted a baby. I don't see any connection between the two and now you have your baby that is very obvious - they are not remotely equivalent.

Cravey · 13/02/2014 16:56

It's ok peach. I sort of got it, be careful though babe. Animals lovers are not allowed an opinion on here.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 13/02/2014 16:58

Plenty of animal lovers have expressed a perfectly rational opinion, actually.

Jess03 · 13/02/2014 16:58

Good for you op, you never know it's just possible the snarly cat will be much happier on a farm or something like that and you'll be happier so it works out well.

Cravey · 13/02/2014 16:59

Lizzy. I posted because I could. And because I wanted to. Just because I don't like cats does not mean I think it's right to behave as the op has. And dusk and shiver just FYI I am a vegan. To some people a cat or any other animal may well be more important than a child. It's the way of the world I'm afraid. And not up to others to tell them they are wrong to put an animal first.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 13/02/2014 17:00

Except that you can't actually say the things you said, because they were deleted.

Cravey · 13/02/2014 17:00

Oh look hop along is back !!!! Who are you to say one persons view is less rational than another's ?

Cravey · 13/02/2014 17:01

Ps hop along I missed you for that five minutes you were gone. And let's be honest as I already said earlier IF you had read the post correctly. I'm happy to make you all feel important by reporting my posts. My good deed for the day !!!

Cravey · 13/02/2014 17:03

And just to make you all happy. Op you are struggling. So the majority of posters on here seem to think anyway. Not at all demeaning towards you are they ? Rehome the cat, treat the other one correctly. As you stated you were not earlier on. Look after your kid. And maybe not bother having another pet.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2014 17:07

Ah. Poor thing.
I could have written your post tbh.
I didn't rehome the cats.one of them. Just adjusted to their new status.
It was easier after DC2 as I became less anxious.