AIBU to pay the live in nanny/au pair this salary.

[SpagBolgs]

£300 a week for 7:30AM-5PM 5 times a week sometimes it may be a bit more. Then give her some money so she can treat herself. She will stay in our house and she get the chance to go to college/university. We will provide her with food, water a shower and internet. She will be treated like a member of the family and will be able to access the family car.

Good point, the live in aspect of the job is for the convenience of the employer not the employee and may be a hindrance not a perk if the nanny has a partner or family commitments.

It is luke sating getting to stay on the rig is a perk of working on a north sea oil platform or thefold down bed in lorry driver's cabs is a bonus in lieu of pay.
In all three cases it is something the employer deems necessary for them to do their job.

for me the only advantage of living in is the lack of commute - and that's just because a typical nanny day is 7-7 so a commute would be a killer.
The downside is you often end up doing free hours or even free evenings.
its very easy to ask the live in to just "keep an eye on the kids" whilst mum nips to the shops. For an hour.

My nanny jobs tend to be live in and I don't mind living in but I get to go to my own house at the weekends. As a live in you're pretty confined to your own room and there is always a lingering feeling of being on duty all the time.

That. Exactly that./ When you live in there's no popping downstairs to grab a snack at the weekend, or making yourself a nice home made dinner in the kitchen. There's no "Oh, I fancy sitting in the garden today!" If you're on a holiday day like a bank holiday but happen to be sitting in your room you are expected to do housework or something since you're being paid for the day anyway. There's no having friends round for a glass of wine or having your friend stay over. It is not simply a matter of "Oh, well you have all of that disposable income anyway..."

I don't see how the OP has changed her demanding job around so that the nanny works 9-5. Personally I wouldn't nanny five kids full time, I didn't realise it was five at first! My three charges are enough for me!

ConfusedPixie, you and me both! I have 3 at the moment (2, 3 & 10) and need to have eyes in the back of my head!

Same! I have a just 1yo, 5yo and 6yo in one of my jobs and I do housekeeping too! Thankfully MBoss doesn't mind too much about the housekeeping, she's more of the "I'd like this done, but if 1yo drives you mad then don't worry!" type boss. Having three is a nice amount though, keeps you busy but not going crazy. Sod five. I'd expect a much higher wage for five tbh.

People don't realize good nannies are like gold dust. You pay for what you get - what your nanny chooses to spend her pay on is no one else's business, regardless of whether they live in or not...

I get the impression that the original poster isn't fissed about getting a good nanny but a cheap unqualified person from eastern Europe she can exploit.

I get the impression the original poster was full of shit (free water and she can be my friend, listed as benefits of employment?!?).

But that's just my opinion as someone who has been employing nannies for a number of years...

I don't work as a FT nanny anymore, mainly for the reasons stated/proven throughout this thread; I can't seem to find a decent employer who has realistic expectations and salary. despite being qualified, experienced with lots of extras (can teach piano and have general teaching experience, driver etc)

I work as a Weekend Nanny now; 7-7 Saturday and Sunday, live in role in West London. I look after the kids and tidy up after them (tidy rooms, load dishwasher, cook but no real "housekeeping")
I get paid £240 net for those two days plus £9 an hour for any extras.
As I said, there are 3 kids.

I doubt I'd go for a 5 kid job anyway but the idea of doing a 10 hour day (and reading between the lines it WILL be more than that) for anything less than £400-£500 net is frankly insulting.
£200 is a joke.

The OP has magically and suspiciously changed her salary to 9-5 at £392 gross.
Low but ok maybe for a junior nanny.
But, let's face it, it won't be 9-5 will it?

I havent added the cost of water and the OPs friendship into this though so the calculations are a bit skewed

The water and friendship are clearly priceless.

But objection presumably you get paid a premium for risking your life in dodgy ski resorts?
Not all nannying jobs come with their own blood man

Objection I was looking into doing weekend nannying, great rates! I currently work Saturdays in one of my jobs and am on quite a good hourly wage for all three days I do with them, near the top end for my local area which I think factors in the weekend work tbh.

I'm looking forward to going down to just that job in July, it's been so difficult finding decent employers, especially ones that fit around one another. This thread definitely highlights some of the issues!

I feel sorry for OPs nanny, what a farce.

A woman I met through scouts locally is getting into nannying by working for her sister. Lives-in, cares for two children (just under a year and just over 2 respectively) for 4 12 hour days and gets £500 a month. She was amazed when I told her that if I were to work her hours at my last employed rate I'd be earning nearly that per week. Her sister is royally ripping her off, especially as she'd be paying almost that per week for a childminder based on £5ph per child. I get angry just thinking about it tbh. Even with no experience this woman I know could get a much better deal!

The live in jobs I had, bar one I treated as my home and I was allowed friends over and treated like one of the family. Perhaps its luck of the draw or personality, who knows and one of those jobs I had 4 children from age 18 months to 7, it was fine. So I do feel I can bang on about It frankly!

DelGirl - lucky you. The family I work with now are the only family in my 6 odd years of experience who I would feel remotely comfortable living with. I'd feel like I was taking the piss to have friends round over frequently.
I used to have a job on a manor estate where I was given my own cottage which, of course, is completely different.
A room in someones house is not comparable to having ones own home.

I must have been lucky then and I dont dispute living in your own home is much better but a nanny would be in a good position to save on the salaries quoted. I'm sure there are lots of qualified nannys demanding high salaries and good luck to them but when compared to nurses, with all they endure, their wages can be pitiful.

I am an employer, of a nanny who lives in mon to fri. I certainly wouldn't want to be tarred as an employer with the same brush as the OP. I think I have done a lot to make my nanny feel as at home as possible and acknowledge the pov being expressed by the nannies, but I do read mumsnet and think sometimes nannies don't realise how difficult it is for the family to have someone living in with them, especially if you value your privacy. Bottom line is that we feel a lot more free and relaxed at the weekends, as does our nanny!

maybe it's me (and I'm a bloke as well!) but why have five kids if all you want to do is get back to work and dump them on someone else? I am not criticising people (both mums and dads) who get a nanny/au pair because they need to work but why five? Seems like just pumping them out because you can. Where's the enjoyment of seeing them grow up? Or do only weekends count? I am more than happy for this to be explained to me. And part of children growing up is teaching them, or so I thought with my two, but will the OPs grow up only learning that free water is a perk?
And I'm prepared for flaming. I have never used a nanny so would appreciate being enlightened

DelGirl - with all due respect, comparing it to nurses is an unfair comparison. Nurses clearly are paid poorly for the extrodinary work they do. But you can belittle almost anyone complaining about job conditions/pay by comparing it to nurses, or other such professions.

I feel well paid in my current positions and have held positions previously where the pay has also been good.

My problem is people's perceptions of the job.
No, it is not like being a Mum - unless you are always having to put 100% in as a Mum yet have no unconditional love for your children.
Yes it is hard, tiring and fustrating and no, naptime does not count as a break.

Many people get nannying confused with babysitting, being a parent or being a dogsbody which is not the case. We are trained professionals who happen to do the job in the employers home.

And whilst a live in nanny gives you plenty of opportunities to save because of the lack of bills - most people want a life, relationships and a family outside of the 50/60/70 hour a week job - living in does not give you the full scope of that.

I don't know of many Nannies over 30 who live in, those who do do not have children and are unmarried. I don't know any nannies over 40 full stop (but that it obviously just my experience).

You can earn a decent wage as a Nanny but the hours are high and the work/life balance is often poor.

(Delgirl - I realise you already know this, being a Nanny, but I wanted to make the general point)

What difference does it make if you have one child and go back to work, or 5 children and go back to work?

Some women actually want to both have children and have jobs

katese11 - [hisses] don't speak of the bloodman! I've only just got rid of him!

TheScience - I think the difference is that if you are back from work and have 3 hours when kids are awake (and OP also cooks for all of them and prepares lunches) you have to split this time between 5 kids not 1

-ineedabodytransplant-

Do you have a wife/partner who stayed or stays at home with your two children?

If your wife/partner works/ed outside the home, you will know of the reason why they did

There are lots of reasons a mother of one child or five children will go back to working outside the home

I can't see the correlation to working outside the home to the number of children at all

If you have to work, you have to work
If you want to work, you want to work

The number of children is irrelevant