To ask people not to put photos of my wedding on Facebook etc?

[Alisvolatpropiis]

It's a few months off and just a passing thought.

I've noticed that people do tend to put photos on Facebook etc throughout the day when attending weddings.

Would I be massively unreasonable to ask people not to do this?

King

Clearly our ideas of being courteous and well mannered do not tally.

YANBU

Your wedding! Just ask no posting pictures of the bride/groom.

People should be enjoying the bloody wedding and not stuck to friggin facebook!

I think people need to accept that expecting to have this level of control over the guests at your wedding is ridiculous.

I think people not being able to spend a day out without updating Facebook is ridiculous.

KingRollo The hosts shouldn't need to have any "level of control" over their guests, because guests should show some consideration and control themselves. This may include controlling their wish to post photos.

KingRollo Seriously? You don't think that putting up pictures of someone else's event without first checking whether they're happy for you to do so, is controlling?

YANBU.

People should be there to enjoy your day with you not publish photos and bloody reviews (I have seen people give marks out of ten for wedding breakfasts alongside photos on fb with running commentary of the day) whilst its ongoing.
A friend of mine got married at a venue with a big mirror in front of where they were stood, all you can see in the photos in the reflections is all their friends holding up camera phones behind them. (In the official photos there was a fair amount of photoshopping at this part). It's a bit sad really

If a couple would like to share photos on FB, they can do so themselves on their own page.

If photos end up on various other people's FB pages, then the couple don't know who's viewing them.

It could be their least favourite colleague, an ex or estranged relative they no longer speak to, various people they'll never meet, etc.

OP it is most certainly not bridezilla-y

This We didn't get our official photos back until about a month after the wedding. I put a few on fb, but I expect most people had lost interest by that point. Is a perfect illustration of one of the points. By the time the bride herself had the opportunity to share her photos of her own wedding, people had lost interest because they'd already seen the previous FB ones.

and this BTW, some of the guest photos are my favourites. I set up a Dropbox and asked people to drop their photos their so I could have them too and some of them are brilliant - that's absolutely fine, and missing the point entirely. Other guest's photos being shared with you privately is absolutely fine, and of course you want to see their point of view of your wedding. That's not what OP has an issue with at all

and KingRollo if you think OP is precious, I suggest you read MrsMoon's comment above yours: there were fb photos up before I even walked into the church. FB saw me before my DH did

Finally, I do love a good snoop through other people's wedding photos on FB as much as the next person. But when it's someone I don't even know, it does make me feel uncomfortable (doesn't stop me though!). The thought of people I don't know, or maybe people I do know but don't like, seeing pics of my own wedding day, in an anonymous fashion, poring over pics of my own private event is just nasty

Stand your ground OP, you're NOT being unreasonable. And any of your guests who give you an 'inward eye roll' at your request can just sod off into a corner where they can amuse themselves staring at photos of other stranger's weddings, while you get on with enjoying the actual day in the real world.

It annoys me so much....

So and so feeling blessed at the zoo - attached with a selfi near the lions.
So and so feeling excited at the zoo - selfi of so and so pulling monkey face at monkeys

So and so feeling hungry at the zoo attached to a plate with fucking food on entitled 'NOM NOM'

I feel like posting back - just enjoy your day and fuck off! People are more obsessed with letting people know who much of a fan-fucking-tastic time they are having than to actually enjoy it!!!

Not everyone wants to be on FB. Not everyone wants their pictures up for whatever reason. My DH is a teacher and students will search/stalk teachers out of nosiness. He therefore doesn't use a fb account and doesn't like others putting pictures up. I have a couple of friends who would be high profile (but not famous famous) and they don't have one. Other people I know have other reasons. My brother doesn't allow photos of his kids etc. It not being controlling of others. Its about having respect for the privacy of family/friends.

Me, I don't care, but that's MY choice.

cosy I'm in a naff mood and some of my posts on other threads have been a tad twatty

I think the posts telling you you're unreasonable just highlight how ingrained facebook is now. Are people that obsessed with uploading every minute detail of their lives that it overrides the right of other people not to be photographed and posted online?

It's all a bit bizarre.

I mean, pre facebook would you all take pictures of someone else's wedding, carry them around, pull them out of your pocket and show them to everyone you knew? You just wouldn't!

We did this. Just a little note on the tables asking that no photos were posted.
We did it because you see so many pictures of peoples events on Facebook, guests just upload everything on their camera. I didn't want people to see a crap picture of us!
Plus I wanted to post the first pictures myself.
I think some people thought it was weird, but no body seemed to mind.

Too me it's the equivalent of taking all your pics down to tesco and pinning them on the notice board. Urghh!

Surely it is just good manners to not post pics of The bride and Groom and the actual wedding on Facebook until the Bride has photo's on her page herself?

I love taking Photo's and often get compliments on them or asked to take some, so always take a few snaps at weddings but I would never just post them on FB -I always send them via private message or would post them up a couple of weeks later if Bride has posted pics up and is obviously happy for photo's of her to be up.

I don't think you can stop guests posting pics of you up on facebook however I think it is perfectly acceptable for people to share their own special day/news before someone else does on their page.

It is the same if a friend has had a baby and we have been called or text with the news , I will post congratulations on FB if there are already a couple of congratulations post on their page but I would never say "ooh 'Tarquin' is such a lovely name -great choice" If the couple have not posted the name themselves -It is stealing someone elses thunder and surely it is polite to let them share the news first.

I would either put a message in the invite or have an usher to remind that although you are delighted to share your day with your friends and family you are also very excited to share your day with friends further afield/or who can't make it via FB so you would appreciate if people could wait until after the wedding to share any photos on social media so that you have the chance to post pics of the new Mr and Mrs X yourself.

Noits

That's a really good idea!

I am glad that most of you can see where I'm coming from. I don't mind people taking photos of each other enjoying the day and posting them. They can take photos of me and/my dp, it's just I'd rather those weren't posted.

A good friend got married recently, but we couldn't be there.
Being able to see guest's on-line photos very soon after the ceremony made us still feel as we had some connection with the event.

YANBU

Not everyone likes FB and not everyone wants to be on FB. I think guests should respect the wishes of the B&G.

My sisters sister in law did that and everyone thought she was weird.
I can see why you wouldn't want it, maybe just politely ask people to make sure the photos are not 'public'?