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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this teacher is a bit of a cowbag?

242 replies

SaintLauren · 24/01/2014 21:39

My DD is 5 is they started to learn how to sing "Alouette" in school. My DH is french and does not like this song because of what it's about and my DD can understand the song too.

Today she told her teacher that her dad doesn't like her singing that song because of what it means.

And the teacher replied that - yes that was absolutely fine, do you like the song Ring Around The Rosie.

My DD said yes she loved that song and the teacher replied that it's a song about people dying from the plague.

Aibu to think this makes her a cowbag?

OP posts:
NigellasDealer · 25/01/2014 00:50

Grin your name suits your evil laugh !!

aderynlas · 25/01/2014 00:51

Probably best not to take your little girl to see jack and the beanstalk op. Seriously, sorry she was upset hope they are singing something different soon.

makemineapinot · 25/01/2014 00:52

Night, this is getting ridiculous! Read, read, and understand who people are replying to - some people were urging op to complain. I never said op was complaining to ht.

makemineapinot · 25/01/2014 00:57

Maybe your dh could go into school and teach the children basic French..? Better that children learn from a native speaker and learn the language properly than from a teacher who probably hasn't spoken a word of the language since she was 16 at best (in school)and who has been told to do it by an LEA who have no clue...

CoffeeTea103 · 25/01/2014 00:57

If these are the things that concern you I wonder what you would do when the important things happen.
Hmm

Original poster
SaintLauren · 25/01/2014 01:00

You are tapped make

Play it out in your head how you want .... but you're coming across as slightly deranged now.

And my dd is pretty much fluent in French and wouldn't need her father to explain what the song meant.

But ok dear whatever you like, haven't you got better things to do? Like get your ruby slippers back?

OP posts:
Original poster
SaintLauren · 25/01/2014 01:02

If these are the things that concern you I wonder what you would do when the important things happen.

IF what happened is 100% true then I think it is important. A child should learn from an early age that it's ok to stand up for what you believe in and to be able to voice an opinion without being shot down by a figure of trust.

And before make jumps on me I said IF.

OP posts:
makemineapinot · 25/01/2014 01:10

Umm..? Why am I 'tapped'? Don't understand? What does that mean? Your dd said why she didn't like it,and teacher explained about another familiar song - no one knows what she actually said or how she said it. Some of us disagreed with you, but you did post in AIBU! Apologies if you aren't a troll, but before slagging off your child's teacher like that you should have spoken to her instead. This whole conversation and personal attacks are based on what a 5 year old thinks her teacher might have said. . God help you in Y5 for puberty talks!!!

Original poster
SaintLauren · 25/01/2014 01:16

DD is not my only child. She is my youngest. So I don't need you to give me God's help.

Anyway I thought you said night? And then oddly commented again 5 minutes later (despite no-one else saying anything) and still continue to comment.

I know what AIBU - people will agree and disagree. But I won't respect anyones opinion if they call someone a troll with no proof in a sneaky and underhand way, which they clearly find hilarious.

OP posts:
CaffeinatedKitten · 25/01/2014 02:35

Saint Lauren I see your Bieber and raise you Celine Dion! Wink

I think it was wrong of the teacher to dismiss the discomfort of your daughter. She should know she is a bilingual child, and would thus understand the words to the song. There are other French songs out there, Frere Jacques would have done just as well with the bonus of it being considerably shorter:)

OutragedFromLeeds · 25/01/2014 02:56

madwoman at least read the OP. The DD speaks French, she understands the song, she didn't need her Dad to explain it to her. Your whole post and point is redundant.

Bwahahahaha ha

MollyPutTheKettleOn · 25/01/2014 04:56

Could your daughter have said to the teacher "Daddy doesn't like the song and said I don't have to sing it if I don't want to"? It would have been sensible for someone to actually speak to the teacher direct to explain why she may choose not to sing the song as she understands the lyrics, rather than letting her take it upon herself to inform her teacher that her Dad has said can opt out of a class activity if she wants.

The teacher was U in her reply. It did sound a bit petty. Especially to a 5 yr old but I'm imagining she was a bit annoyed at your DH.

ChineseFireball · 25/01/2014 06:23

Lots of nursery rhymes have nasty undertones or meanings, set to a pleasant or catchy tune. And not just nursery rhymes...Does your DD like the song 'Blurred Lines' too? Have you told her what that is about? Are you happy for her to sing it in public? Dance to it at children's parties? What about 'Gangnam Style' (anyone actually know what that is about, btw?)? 'Small Bump'?

The way you describe it it sounds like the teacher was being childish in a sort of "tit for tat" way (Oh good grief now that sounds like it might be swapping sex for goods if you don't have the money...hmm...Anyway, I digress...). I get that you're a bit miffed but I doubt it happened exactly like that. And I certainly don't think the teacher is "a cowbag".

Sorry, OP, I think YABU.

3bunnies · 25/01/2014 06:49

Did the teacher actually know what the lyrics meant? I know that the teachers in my dc's school were expected to teach French when they had very little knowledge (think mistakes a child in yr 7/8 wouldn't make). I was one of those nasty parents who did challenge it (subtly I hope) and now they have changed it so that teachers use audiovisual resources unless they are confident in their language skills. She may well have been teaching the song without knowing the lyrics. I think that if those lyrics had been taught in English to the class there might have been more opposition amongst other parents.

amyshellfish · 25/01/2014 07:05

I think you and your husband are being incredibly precious about it. You don't know what the teacher said or how she said it you have s 5 year old word to go on. I think you need to pick your battles and quite frankly not be so over sensitive.

LifeIsBetterInFlipFlops · 25/01/2014 07:09

You realise that bringing up a nursery song with the school is going to make you sound ridiculous don't you.

BoneyBackJefferson · 25/01/2014 09:33

candycoatedwaterdrops
"Blimey, people are so narky when someone dares to criticise a teacher!"

I don't mind people criticising teachers, I do however care about people calling people names, If the OP had posted "AIBU to think that the teacher handled this badly" then she would have got different responses.

Original poster
SaintLauren · 25/01/2014 09:34

You realise that bringing up a nursery song with the school is going to make you sound ridiculous don't you.

You realise that I've never said once on this thread I was going to "bring up" or complain about anything to the school.

OP posts:
amyshellfish · 25/01/2014 09:36

You said upthread you weren't sure whether to say anything to the school didn't you? Maybe your daughter was being cheeky.

Original poster
SaintLauren · 25/01/2014 09:46

Does your DD like the song 'Blurred Lines' too? Have you told her what that is about? Are you happy for her to sing it in public

Why are people finding it so hard to grasp the difference between a hidden message and laying out a message in clear/graphic terms.

I can't see why that's such a hard thing to grasp .... Confused

If DD understood the hidden meaning of Blurred Lines and didnt like it then I'd tell her she doesn't have to sing along to it.

OP posts:
CheeseStrawWars · 25/01/2014 09:47

"her dad... said he didn't like that song either and if she didn't want to sing it then she didn't have too"

I think your DH is in the wrong here. It would have been appropriate for either you or your DH to speak to the teacher if you felt so strongly about it, not to let your 5 year old daughter have that conversation with the teacher.

nennypops · 25/01/2014 09:48

YANBU. This comes over very much as a teacher who tried to put a 5 year old child down and score points, totally unnecessarily. Why on earth would she even have mentioned "Ring of Roses" otherwise?

JodieGarberJacob · 25/01/2014 09:49

Agree with cheese.

Imagine other children coming in the next day and saying they didn't have to do maths if they didn't want to.Grin

amyshellfish · 25/01/2014 09:52

Nobody knows how the teacher said it. No 5 year old likes being "told off" and simply pointing out that other songs have unpleasant meanings is not telling off but a 5yo might have taken it to be. It's not as if the song is offensive ffs kids don't get to pick and choose what part of the class they join in with.

Ubik1 · 25/01/2014 09:56

It's just about preparing a bird before you eat it. Most of us eat birds.

What's the big deal? t's just one lesson on one day, it doesn't really matter, does it. and the teacher is just a person trying to get a job done, not a 'cowbag'

Some nursery rhymes are fairly sinister: Mary, Mary quite contrary is supposed to be about Catholicism and the persecution of Protestants

Does your daughter like Le Marseillaise I absolutely love it, what a song!