About eating out and tipping

[Normalisavariantofcrazy]

I've just endured a meal with the inlaws and fil insisted on rounding the bill up - not to the nearest £10 but to the nearest £20 before splitting it out evenly between us all.

The meal was a set price the only thing that varied it was the drinks.

DH and I only had enough money for our share of the bill (tight month) and yet FIL would not accept this and nearly started a row saying we should pay the extra as it was for a tip, the service was shit tbh and didn't deserve one.

AIBU to be angry with FIL for insisting we spend more money than we had budgeted for a)because he got pissed as a fart and most of the bill was his drinks and b) for him rounding it up without asking

How do you deal with group meals and splitting the bill? This has really upset me as I'm now utterly skint

I hate the tipping situation. The service should be amazing as a given as that is what their job is to do.

volestair... I didn't think lilyaldrin's post was clever, funny or subtle either - serious or not and there's nothing wrong with my reading comprehension. I think your 'mocking' of scottishmummy's post is rude though. Are you part of some patronising 'tag team'?

As opposed to the discourtesy of you explaining someone else post to me
But denying that's what you were doing vole star

It's not courteous to suggest I lack reading comprehension vole star

I always tip 10-15% unless the service is bad, I have never eaten out with anyone who didn't automatically tip.

If I couldn't afford the tip then I wouldn't go out to eat as I would feel terrible if I just walked out leaving nothing on the table for the service. I would be too embarrassed to go back to a restaurant if I hadn't tipped ..........and a bit worried that they would spit in my food next time!

volestair don't read dont re;ply
that's my advice
Maybe i am and maybe I';m not. Yeasss.

Back on topic... I don't like the tipping situation in the UK, there is some very bad service with high expectation of tipping and it's unreasonable. Good waiting staff should be paid appropriately and tips should be a conscious 'nod' to excellent service. Customers who tip really well for bad service do nothing to encourage or support those waiting staff who really do their job well.

I tip very generously for excellent service (which I often get and really appreciate) and round up by a pound or so for 'bog standard' service.

There's no answer to it really, why are waiting staff held up as requiring tips yet nurses and other service professionals earn the same or less yet receive no tips?

I don't think one needs to factor tip in when deciding whether or not to go out
Purely business point if view it's preferential to go out,be spending customer
As opposed to not spending and staying home,which impacts on profit and establishment needs profit

Your explanation was unnecessary,it's not your role to dig someone out a hole

... and I never, ever pay the service charge on card readers. Why should I? If the service is good, I'll pay that charge and more, to the waiting staff, in cash, so I know it goes to them.

Personal tipping is very much better, in my opinion. If I was challenged about not paying the service charge I'd ask for an explanation as to why it is there and suggest that the restaurant looks at making it 'non-optional' if that's what it is.

quoting from limited:
I find it hard to believe the people who say they've withheld the tip because of poor service in restaurants.

I don't withhold because of bad service. I don't tip at all. I've always had a lovely enjoyable time when out, and have never experienced worse service just because I don't tip.
I go all over too.
Which kind of pees all over the notion some people believe that if you don't tip, waiters are going to spit on your food or some such nonsense.

It was only when I made friends with a tightwad - who, incidentally had a sideline in insulting cab drivers - that I realised why she had difficulty getting a cab from her local firm.
"A sideline in insulting cab drivers." Think you've nailed the answer to that on the head - absolutely BOG ALL to do with not leaving a tip, and everything to do with being rude and insulting with, I'm presuming, words!
Not comparable.

As I said I've requested service charge be removed.no qualms at all

I'm not affiliated to anybody volestair, you took it on yourself to explain the post of another and to pick on somebody else in quite a spiteful manner. That's what bullies do. If you read the thread back, there were other posters who didn't get the 'joke' either.

It's like that at the nursery I work in limited. I always remember the good Christmas presents. Guess which kid gets it's nappy changed first?

God, if that's true, that's absolutely f***g disgusting and the person doing it is obviously completely in the wrong profession.
You look after children because you love looking after them, not because their mum gave you a box of chocolates and their friend didn't because they couldn't afford it.
Absolutely, without a doubt tipping needs to be abolished immediately if there's some sickos like that out there.
Vile.

Seeing you explained the post to me vole star,will you explain it to dancing lady too?

It's like that at the nursery I work in limited. I always remember the good Christmas presents. Guess which kid gets it's nappy changed first?

That's really, really horrible.

Quoting from MakingEveryDayCount

On the whole I enjoy good service because I think I am pleasant and so are the people who serve me, regardless of tip. However, when I don't tip where it is expected, I do notice that people are a bit disappointed. But I'm not made of money.

However, when I've tipped generously the service increases exponentially. That's why I do it in places I'd like to go back to. Try it. You'd be surprised.

Lots of people on this thread have talked about bad service, though nobody has outlined what that bad service was and why they continue to encounter it.

I suspect some people use that as an excuse for being rude and being tight.

But I'm sure that's not you.

Read the thread,posters have explained explicitly what they consider poor service
Service they won't tip for
It's pretty clear

On the whole I enjoy good service because I think I am pleasant and so are the people who serve me, regardless of tip. However, when I don't tip where it is expected, I do notice that people are a bit disappointed. But I'm not made of money.
However, when I've tipped generously the service increases exponentially. That's why I do it in places I'd like to go back to. Try it. You'd be surprised. Lots of people on this thread have talked about bad service, though nobody has outlined what that bad service was and why they continue to encounter it. I suspect some people use that as an excuse for being rude and being tight.

Quoting from me? Think you may have mixed up with someone else. That definitely wasn't my post.

Here's an example of bad service, posted by Lollerskates:

"...I had a waitress once on a Saturday morning who literally dropped the cutlery for all six of us into the middle of the table and then walked away, instead of laying the table up properly. She got a particularly handsome tip from me because I project like a motherfucker."

I wouldn't have tipped AT ALL. I wouldn't have complained because I don't want somebody to lose their job but others might have. My mum would, that's for sure.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

volestair... I didn't think lilyaldrin's post was clever, funny or subtle either - serious or not and there's nothing wrong with my reading comprehension. I think your 'mocking' of scottishmummy's post is rude though. Are you part of some patronising 'tag team'?

To be frank, I thought exactly the same. Even if it was a joke, I'd hate to think that my dc were ever near anyone like lilyaldrin

Just to add my experience of bad service. I once asked a waitress if a particular dish comprised strips of meat or a whole piece of meat.

Her reply? ''What does it matter? You've got a knife and fork''

But, I am sure, there are some posters on here who would still have given a tip in these circumstances.

Quoting from me? Think you may have mixed up with someone else. That definitely wasn't my post.

MakingEveryDayCount You quoted from me. Like here:

^MakingEveryDayCount Sat 18-Jan-14 20:23:42
quoting from limited:
I find it hard to believe the people who say they've withheld the tip because of poor service in restaurants.^

and here

It was only when I made friends with a tightwad - who, incidentally had a sideline in insulting cab drivers - that I realised why she had difficulty getting a cab from her local firm.

So I answered you. I thought that was the convention when someone names you and highlights your post; you think they want a response, don't you?

But I'm beginning to realise why you don't understand the quaint habit of tipping people or being polite to them in order to oil the wheels of social convention.