To mention gifts in the christening invitation?

[Bankholidaybaby]

Not the invitation exactly - the information sheet I'm emailing to people who say they are coming. I wasn't going to write anything about presents, as that's not why we're having a christening, but then I thought: people are going to bring gifts so isn't it sensible to try to steer them in the right direction so that we don't get (as happened at my son's birth and at Christmas) clothes that are too small or too big but inappropriate for the weather when he'll fit into them.

I was thinking about putting something like: please don't feel you need to get the baby a gift - we invited you because we want to spend time with you, and share our baby's special day. If you do consider giving him a present, however, clothes for 6-9 months suitable for the spring, or 9-12 months for the summer would be very useful.

Or maybe I just say - if you'd like any ideas for presents, please ask me.

Or perhaps I don't say anything and hope things that don't fit are returnable.

Advice greatly appreciated.

No way
I would only give a gift if I was a godparent, or close family.

Yep, the only time I've given a gift at a christening is if I've been a godparent. It really wouldn't occur to me otherwise.

There seems to be a divide on whether it's bad form not to bring a gift to a christening.

We were invited to my dad's wife's daughter's (stay with me) FB's christening. Dad remarried when I was 30. Daughter same age as me and I think her mum imagined us becoming best friends. No, not interested, not enough time to see real friends let alone cultivate a friendship with someone I don't really have much in common with. Anyway, we only attended christening as we were fairly close by in holiday cottage for w/e with some mates. Took a card, attended the service and reception afterwards. I hadn't thought about a gift, only at the last minute when it was too late to do anything about it and realised one might be expected.

Dad's wife made a point of saying next time we saw them 'oh xx couldn't find a present from you after the reception' in a way to make me feel shit. Which I did, but it also made me feel that they were being grabby.

This thread just made me think about whether I was out of order or they were

I would take a gft to a christening regardless of whether or not I was a godparent. It might be something small but always a bit "keepsake-ish".
Sometimes I am flush dn's more generous, other times money is tight and I have to be more frugal/ creative.
However, I wouldn't expect guests to bring gifts to my dcs christening.

seventiesgirl my opinion as a godless parent whose friends are equally godless may not be worth much as I've only been to one christening ever, but you were not in the wrong.

If people want to, I don't see what is wrong with giving a gift and spending as much or as little as they want. So far as it being obligatory/expected, anyone thinking that might do better to concentrate on the "christ" part of the word. From what I know of the New Testament wouldn't he find that at odds with his teaching?

Of course you weren't, Seventies. The only thing ruder than demanding specific gifts for a christening is questioning their absence after the event . She was pig rude.

There is nothing wrong with bringing a present to a christening.

There is also nothing wrong with not bringing a present - it is not something that is expected. Wedding would be different.

There is also nothing wrong with not bringing a present - it is not something that is expected. Wedding would be different.

If you're offered hospitality of a sit-down meal and drinks after a Christening, then perhaps it's nice to give something back though.

Thanks for comments. I have a personal battle with dad's wife making inappropriate comments usually behind my back but I tend to overhear. What upsets me is that my dad gets upset with my apparent thoughtlessness etc which us seen as being very offensive, not by him perhaps but on behalf of his wife. What's even more frustrating is that she is very good for my dad, looks after him etc so part of me feels I can't kick up a fuss.

Anyway, my DS not christened to both their chagrin! Get one over them that way!