To have expected this woman to move seats

[appletarts]

I was on the train back from London, with a first class ticket. In the carriage there was one space available for a buggy with a seat facing it, also described as disabled access. I arrived just as a woman was putting her things on the seat, I said excuse me do you think I could put my buggy here? She goes yes but sits down in the seat opposite it. Uh... I said do you think I could have that seat so I can look after my child during the journey and she starts moaning saying she's booked in advance and wants to sit in her booked seat. I asked her does she have a specific need which means she needs this seat, she says no. I said well I'm sure you don't want to meet the needs of my child for three hours do you? How about you let me have that seat so I can look after my DD and if someone comes on a disputes you being in that free seat we'll deal with it then. She then moans more saying she's booked and why is she being made out to be in the wrong, lots of eye rolling and tutting on her part. I say she can sit in 99% of the seats available and I need this 1%, I need this one seat. Eventually she moves but behaves as if she's been evicted and sits with a cats arse face for most of journey sighing everytime my dd dared utter a gurgle. Seriously? Is this unreasonable of me?

bruffin, words fail me. Your experience is obviously completely universal and i am making up all the problems i've encountered.

Hoochy - you are the only person on this thread who seems to have these problems. Lots of other posters see no problem in leaving the buggy and sitting elsewhere with the baby. I have never seen anyone have to fold a pushchair on a train in all my years of traveling.
I did once have to travel in the guards van because they had to put the old train on once with those single slam doors and couldnt get my push chair in.

I used to walk to the next station which was half an hour rather than 10 minutes because i didnt have to use stairs at that one. I am lucky we had another train station close by

I regularly managed to travel with three dc when they were young, including one in a buggy, without the luxury of a designated space for the buggy. It never once occurred to me that my decision either to have children or to travel with them entitled me to turf people out of their seats.

the seat that the OP was wanting is the seat that comes with the wheelchair space. Which on most trains and services is not bookable by non wheelchair users. it is strange that someone wold be sitting there or would have been allowed to book it without a wheelchair

hoochycoo like the others, I"ve read all your posts. It seems to me that you've decided that you know the layout of this particular train, although it seems to me that it's hard to tell this categorically from the OP. And if it were the other passenger's booked seat, then she was absolutely OK to sit in it.

The OP seems to misunderstand the concept of a space for those with disabilities and/or in a wheelchair: she calls it
one space available for a buggy with a seat facing it, also described as disabled access

I happen to think that the way people write is quite a giveaway of how they think. I think the way that the OP has prioritised her "buggy space" over the actual use of the space for disabled access is very telling.

Hooochy. Yes, it would be great if there were areas just for buggys and I can only imagine the hassle of unloading and folding a buggy and holding a baby, watching a toddler etc.

But that isn't what people are disagreeing about. All we have to go on is the post by Appletarts and not once did she say please or thank the woman for moving from the seat she had booked. That is bloody rude.

I have been lurking on this thread and I will admit to not having read the last page or so but....having read the thread from the beginning I was terribly excited at taking a train journey with dd in her pram today, all the while with this thread in the back of my mind.

As OP describes, I got on in the wheelchair access carriage and lo and behold on each side was a space for 1-2 prams or 1 wheelchair with two seats. One side was occupied by two women with large suitcases so I parked the pram on the other and me and my travelling companion sat down. Two stops later not one but two families with buggies boarded. Right, this is going to get interesting I though, still with this thread echoing in my head.

First family came on, said nothing to two ladies with suitcases but asked politely if they could fit their pram in. Started making motions to get child out of pram etc. Ladies with bags started to shift their bags and I offered to help them lift the bags into a luggage compartment. Still no one had mentioned anyone moving. Then, as the luggage compartment was further down, the ladies offered to move seats and sit closer to their luggage. By this time the other family had already folded their pram, taken their dc and sat down in another carriage.

On the way back similar scenario. I got the left wheelchair access area and chap with suitcase was on the other side. Another family with pram board. Again, they politely ask if they can fit their pram in, and husband takes dc to go and sit somewhere else while woman sits in spare seat next to man with suitcase to keep and eye on pram. At this point man with suitcase offers to move.

At no point did anyone ask anyone else to move, speculate about anyones disability, no one was rude or made anyone feel uncomfortable, no one had a sense of entitlement to a seat just because they had a pram and the whole situation was sorted out in a few minutes. So see OP, it is possible to travel by train with a pram without resorting to rudeness!

ravenak, if you think that it's besides the point, then i'm dissapointed at your lack of empathy, compassion and inability to follow a tangent.

Nope. I entirely empathise with OP's wish not to have to remove her child from the buggy, & I can follow the tangent of some people being a bit crap at buggy-folding no problem.

I was myself, to be fair.

I'll grant you 'compassion' feels like a bit of a stretch; she was mildly inconvenienced by her own lack of forethought & terrible manners & subsequently behaved like an arse. It's hardly a disaster meriting compassion. Especially since she did in fact get the desired result from her little tantrum.

I have just read the entire thread and am disappointed - the OP still hasn't explained why she didn't book a ticket herself. Even supposing that she couldn't specifically book the space she wanted, surely the sensible action would be to book any seat and hope that if she asked nicely, the person sat in the required seat MIGHT be prepared to swap. The key is how you approach the problem of boarding a train with a buggy. You can have the attitude of, "it might be difficult but I can make it as easy as possible", by booking a seat and being polite" - or you can have the attitude of "it's all about me and what I want" which is what came across to me and many other posters in the OP.

I know this sounds so vair vair evil of me but I am kind of on the watch from now on if I go north of Watford (assume this is where OP was travelling to) and encounter OP.

but then again I hardly venture ooop North and can't afford First Class.

I may be off to Sheffield soon though so will be keeping my little eyes peeled for OP.

Hello you shoild be safe as you'll be on a different route. The op will have been travelling yo Newcastle or Durham on the rast coast mainline if yhe journey yimr was three hours.