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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Are your children the most beautiful little people you have ever seen?

214 replies

lollalaughs · 16/12/2013 12:36

Do you think your children are the most beautiful things in the world. I mean genuinely?

I have only ever known one person say their child is not cute. I have heard oh he has big ears or a big head etc

Reason I am asking because more than one person I know said before they got pregnant that if their child is ugly they would know, they wouldnt just say they are good looking for the sake of it etc etc.

They have their child and guess what they say the child is beautiful. They KNOW their child is and they would definately say if they wasn't. But the said children are not beautiful...

So question what is it that makes people think their kids are gawjusss even if they are clearly not?

SN: I am ready to be slated but this is a genuine question and relates to people pre pregnancy who slag of children for not being stereotypical cute.

OP posts:
SugarHut · 16/12/2013 22:23

DS, now 5, is stunning.

DS as a newborn was frankly bizarre. Baggy skin, funny shaped head, red and angry, and managed to look worse and worse until he was about 2. I can see the beauty in a baby or young child, even the funniest looking bod can pull the most fabulous expressions, but poor old DS, I would honestly despair at some of our photos. Then he kind of just changed, his hair grew properly, he filled out, he lost the strange red tinge (still no idea what that was!) and gradually he looked better and better.

He's been in Boden now, he's properly beautiful. Like a mini Harry Styles. Although I am fully prepared for goodness only knows what when he morphs into a teen Grin

I have friends with little girls, a couple I look at and think how pretty and delicate they are, and one, bless her, looks alarmingly like DS did back then. My friend gets terribly upset when we go out as she always thinks no matter what she does, her DD always looks like the plain jane. I have shown her photos of DS at 18mths (when he was looking particularly like a Klingon) and told her not to worry!!

CaterpillarCara · 16/12/2013 22:23

I know strangers say nice things about everyone's kids. In my post I meant that what they say about my DD is also the "beauty" that I see - mischief / crazy fashion sense / action / cheekiness / liveliness. I see that and they comment on the same, they don't say "oh she is gorgeous" (as, in a literal sense, she is not).

AnyFuckerWillDo · 16/12/2013 22:25

My babies are the cutest babies ever. Fact. Grin So smitten

inadreamworld · 16/12/2013 22:30

Yes I think my DC are definitely the most beautiful/handsome children I have ever seen. But I don't generally go around telling the world I think so (other than now). I think the same LaRegina I think most Mums (and Dads) do!

katese11 · 16/12/2013 22:37

Yes, my children are both quite good-looking and other people have told me that too...but I am def not blind to their other faults! If dd wasn't so cute, she would have been left at the farm with the other piglets by now!

sweetkitty · 16/12/2013 22:40

DD1 and DD3 are classically beautiful, they sparkle.

DD2 can be quite ugly unbeautiful when she's not smiling but she has a gorgeous smile, she looks different to the rest but it suits her and her personality.

DS is the most handsome boy in the world, he had eyes the colour if melted chocolate and the longest eyelashes ever, combined with the cheeky smile he's just lovely

MrsMook · 16/12/2013 22:44

My babies didn't have much of a newborn look. Between failed ventouses and a rough time with forceps, it took a few days for their heads to have normal shapes. I've always thought that they look like dolls.

DS1 is pretty. He has a mop of golden hair with brown eyes framed by lushious lashes. He thought he was on a cover of a catalogue in the summer (Kept pointing at it and saying his name). Fortunately his generously proprotioned head gives him a cute baby-faced look.

DS2 is better captured on video than photo. His charm is in a great cheeky grin, but he gets distracted by the camera so looks a bit gormless and serious on photos which doesn't do him justice. He's very cute and cheerful, just not particularly photogenic.

Some babies and toddlers are very lovely. Some are less appealing. I am biased towards my own, but can see beauty in others. Some babies and toddlers take time to blossom.

There's a little girl in very extended family that would be very pretty if her face wasn't permanently scowling and pouting. Beauty is as much about expression and personality as arrangement of facial features.

JamesBlonde · 16/12/2013 22:52

My DH and I agree we have the most beautiful DD with her white blonde long curls, porcelain skin and big blue eyes - even though she can pull a mean pet lip.

I think other children, par a few, look quite plain but their personalities come through when they smile. All children look cute when they smile.

When you love someone, especially your child, they are beautiful surely?

TheFallenMadonna · 16/12/2013 22:53

My DS was a peculiar looking baby. I used to call him pinhead jug ears (as a term of affection of course), so I wasn't blind to it. But I still found him irresistible, and just gazed and gazed at him. He's got better looking with age, thank goodness. He's a constant marvel to me.

Mattissy · 16/12/2013 22:55

Damn right they are and I'll scratch the eyes out if anyone who says different, lol

Ds is 12 and gets plenty of giggly female attention but he's completely oblivious. Back off girls!!!!

whogrewoutoftheterribletwos · 16/12/2013 23:00

Neither of mine were pretty babies. my ds looked like he'd just been in a fight when he was born - so much so that the soft, lyrical names we had on the list were chucked immediately. Favourite was when ds (7) came to see his new dsis in hospital when she was born. He looked at all the babies in the ward then came and asked me 'are all newborn babies ugly then?'. My reply? 'yes, ds, yes they are'

foreverondiet · 16/12/2013 23:52

I have been told that my DC are "objectively cute" but I do think that most young children are cute / beautiful but by maybe 7-9 it wears away a bit. And yes we are programmed to find our children beautiful especially as babies and toddlers.

needaholidaynow · 17/12/2013 00:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cory · 17/12/2013 07:30

Surely it's just a question of how you define "handsome" and "ugly".

When we speak of other people we tend to define "handsome" as fitting a certain set of criteria. It doesn't have to mean the same as attractive, it doesn't have to mean this person sends you into a warm glow of love and adoration. It just means they look a certain way.

Some of us are quite happy to use the same terminology in the same way when thinking of our own children because we know the reason for our love lies elsewhere.

Other people seem to need a different set of terminology to think of their own children.

Dh is not conventionally handsome. But I find him attractive. I don't need to believe he looks like George Clooney to think that.

Ds was not a conventionally beautiful baby. But I loved looking at him. I didn't need to think he was beautiful in the same way as other beautiful babies were beatiful to love looking at him.

When dd sings in the kitchen (more often now as her health is improving) it sends a warm glow all through me. But I would have to be totally deluded not to notice that she is off key. Doesn't mean I wouldn't rather have her than Kiri te Kanawa singing in the kitchen.

Loving them does indeed make me love their faces. I just don't need the "beatiful" terminology to describe that feeling.

(though incidentally, ds did turn into a handsome little lad at 2- made no difference to my feelings for him, though)

MOTU · 17/12/2013 07:37

My daughter has a bit of the Ruby Tandoh about her, massive eyes(too big for her face) and an overly expressive mouth. Some would see her as weird looking-obviously we think shes lush! This comparison took hold even more when they showed childhood pics of the bakers in the final, it was like theirs taken pics of DD in 80's clothes!

MrsDavidBowie · 17/12/2013 09:20

I can say, hand on heart, that dd was not an attractive baby.
She was fat, covered in eczema, miserable and bald. Then suddenly, at 10 months old, she wasn't.

She is now a stunning six foot 17 year old.

Ds has always been a beautiful boy, since the day he was born. Lots of hair helped. He is now a very handsome six foot (and growing) 14 year old.

pictish · 17/12/2013 09:23

Is it just me that is snickering away at this thread? Grin

Spink · 17/12/2013 09:27

Ds looked like Les Dennis when he was a baby. I guess that might appeal to some tastes Wink

VisualiseAHorse · 17/12/2013 09:30

My baby is GORGEOUS! I can't get enough of him and his lovely little face. I didn't find him gorgeous until about 6 months old, but before that I was very depressed, so I don't think I ever really looked at him properly.

Ninasaurus · 17/12/2013 09:53

Before I had dc I thought the majority of children were beautiful in their own ways. Some were not, but they were in the minority.

After having dc I have to say my opinion has strangely changed and now I think the majority of children are very plain and some are simply not good looking at all.

My dc naturally gorgeous :)

Mattissy · 17/12/2013 10:37

I'm not laughing. Granted some people on this thread will be deluded and will have distinctly plain children but I personally think the unconditional love and rose coloured specs are beautiful in themselves.

revivingshower · 17/12/2013 11:12

I agree mattissy it would be a much sadder thread if everyone had turned out not to think the dc were beautiful.

livenlet · 17/12/2013 11:32

Sometimes only a mumcan see the beuty in there baby . Its true there are ugly babys/children stop pretending there isnt. My first is genuinlly stunning and my second well lets just say she had to grow into her face a little , shes cute now

SomethingkindaOod · 17/12/2013 11:33

DS was a weird looking baby, like a pink frog in a sleep suit Grin, both him and his sister had massive birth trauma due to very quick births according to the MW so their faces were swollen for a few weeks afterwards. I could see some people looking into the pram and having to make themselves call them beautiful! Of course to me and DH they were the most stunning babies ever born and I would have fought anybody who disagreed.
DD2 was actually a very good looking baby, stereotypically cute newborn features and all tiny and cute.
DS gets called a 'future heartbreaker' now, he's quite a good looking lad in all fairness and his sisters look very much like they'll follow him. God only knows where they get it from, me and DH are distinctly plain!

Whistleblower0 · 17/12/2013 11:34

is it just me who is snickering away at this thread no it's not. LMAO. Honestly, how many deluded parents can you get on one threadGrin