Things I only ever see on Mumsnet and never in RL

[HankyScore]

Wedding gift lists angst. I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where there wasn't a list. It's normal.

Parents who never have even a sniff of booze when their kids are in the house, and the angst over 'what if I need to drive them to hospital?'. Perhaps everyone I know is a raging alky, but it's just never come up as an issue.

Old ladies on the bus having a pop about breastfeeding/children/the yoof of today. Has never happened to me in all my eleven years of parenting. I only ever meet nice people on public transport. Perhaps I am just incredibly thick skinned and don't notice the judgy stares?

People giving much of a shit over BF/FF, or at least not once they are past their own days of feeding a baby.

There is more.

I'm off to think of some.

Myles, I'm with you there. My son is fascinated by anything that sits on the floor. He would not be able to leave a loo brush alone for five seconds. Imagine some shit covered brush being dragged across the landing by a 13 month old leaving a trail of light brown seepage behind him.

Shudders.

I'm a sahm and know lots of others.
My ds2 loves pink and likes dressing up as a princess.
Mumsnet is not real life

RSVPs and children's parties. Never been a big deal. Don't always do it myself. Never had anyone else make a big deal about it.

Oh god - and telling absolutely everyone to get counselling. Not alway bad advice - but bad advice to give always.

seb- exactly the reason I don't have one- ewww!

Monicalewinski you really made me laugh because my life is so not like yours exactly the same DH and I never get pissed at the same time always do because you never know if one of the dc's might need to go to the hospital. unlucky if they do ha ha oh and glad to hear life has moved on after Bill, he was never right for you!

The OPs who leave the key part of their post from their thread opener leading to countless pages of fuffle, only to then get pissed off that no one is agreeing with them and then drops the key info in on page 7. So now everyone has to repost as the situation is 180 degrees different.

Just explain the situation clearly in your opening post and you might get some well considered replies!!!

People who have to have name for everything.

Oh I'm EBF
BLW

We co-sleep
AP

Elimination communication

Look you are all just looking after kids. You are feeding and you are weaning and they are using the toilet. - who cares about official names?

People who panic so much if for one day their kid are nothing but a yogurt or a banana. Welcome to toddlerhood-that's a good day :o

People so obsessed with fruit shoots- yes they arebt great but once a week at party or soft play they arebt going to drop dead.

People who can't dress kids appropriately for a trip then blame the school that clothing wasn't specifically spelt out

People who stop their kids doing everything as it's dangerous. - do you have stairs and a kitchen at home? Better move quick :o

Anyone who buys lelli Kelli shoes.

Anyone who things tv is child abuse

People who are convinced that their child will be homeless,and financially and morally bankrupt by 20 if they allow them to have a chocolate Advent calendar.Such wanton indulgence can only lead to them wanting more,and then where will they be? Most likely taking tips from Bill Sykes,and picking a pocket or two.

The competitive under-spending at Xmas

Cat poo rage and Dog hating

DHs staying out all night without phoning home

Also the amount of micro managing children's activities and play dates is beyond belief.
I'd never heard of a 'play date' (apart from one episode of Friends "You have a play date with a stripper ?!") until I came on here. I just know it as the kids going to a mate's house for tea and if I know their parents I'll go along as well.

Yes and yes to everything in you op. I also think there are a higher percentage of women married to narcissists and misogynists on MN than in RL.

Oh yea and no one ever asks me if I think they are pregnant because they have itchy skin, headaches and other random symptoms. Most people just do a pregnancy test!

caketinrosie

Pretty much everything on this thread. I must live I. Reasonable-ville as everyone seems to accept one another's differences.

That people who ask for something to be done are 'toxic' or 'narc' on here.

I've met some nasty ones but self diagnosis strikes me as stupid.

Passive-aggressiveness.

I am only passive-aggressive when I am deliberately trying to push someone's buttons for whatever reason.

I therefore judge all instances of passive-aggressiveness by my (low?), motivations & standards, and assume that the perpetrator is deliberately being an obnoxious twat.

I cannot accept that people 'really don't understand' that they are WINDING PEOPLE UP!!!

Calling another woman a c* Just using that word at all.

People who send their kids to Eton.

The prevalence of feckless and utterly useless husbands.

People who hate dogs.

Toxic and Narc irritate me a bit too. I had no idea all these toxic people were around.

"Entitled" really annoys me, it's not entitled to expect your family and friends to do you a favour once in a while. It all evens out over time doesn't it?

Haven't seen "grabby" in a while...

People who think that those who get upset because their parents have left their entire five million quid estate to their horrible little brother and only left them 50p and a china cat are unreasonable and entitled.

They can leave their money to whoever they choose! Suck it up you whiny shit.

I have never heard this in RL. Lots of the other things mentioned on here I have personal experience of I am a SAHM, I know toxic people (don't post about them though), friends had doulas, I have witnessed school gate fights and I know someone whose child goes to Eton.

My mum has cat poo rage and "people parking in front of her house" rage I have also been told off by acquaintances (with no children) for going back to work before DC are at school - why have children if you don't want to look after them, apparently. I always say why aren't they asking DH the same thing, they usually splutter for a while and give up.

Never encountered over-enthusiastic school lunch box policing (although I am sure it exists).

Angst over DC having chocolate advent calendars.

Anyone at all caring/noticing what anyone else has in their houses in terms of pebbles, feature walls, photos, etc. Ditto to giving the tiniest shit about what sort of toilet paper other people have.

People who think you should send your kid to the local shitty school that's always been shit and has the lowest attendance and sats results of any school in the area because wanting more means you are a snob.

People who's kids never have tantrums.

People who's one year olds really do eat smoked salmon caviar and Stilton.

People who's kids few up and became a princess because they wanted nothing else after watching Disney.

People who panic over girls who are Girly.

People whos kids get these organic healthy locally sourced meat and veg for school dinners.

People who actually think Ella's pouches are superior to jars.

People so adamant that their baby won't eat a morsel til exactly six months.

People who hate soft play so much

People who moan the cakes are out with the savoury food at kids parties

I do not drink at home unless I know someone else is sober to take the kids to hospital. Which basically means I don't drink at home. That's ok though, I was raised teetotal and it's not much of a loss.