Things I only ever see on Mumsnet and never in RL

[HankyScore]

Wedding gift lists angst. I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where there wasn't a list. It's normal.

Parents who never have even a sniff of booze when their kids are in the house, and the angst over 'what if I need to drive them to hospital?'. Perhaps everyone I know is a raging alky, but it's just never come up as an issue.

Old ladies on the bus having a pop about breastfeeding/children/the yoof of today. Has never happened to me in all my eleven years of parenting. I only ever meet nice people on public transport. Perhaps I am just incredibly thick skinned and don't notice the judgy stares?

People giving much of a shit over BF/FF, or at least not once they are past their own days of feeding a baby.

There is more.

I'm off to think of some.

[Mammagaga]

Is this a joke? I regularly experience all of the above...

[bryte]

People who have two dishwashers fitted in their kitchen so that they never have to empty it, they use the secondary one as storage. I'm not criticising it, just saying I don't know anyone IRL who does this, has space for this or would ever think of doing it. In the Mumsnet property section, it seems common.

[AnyoneforTurps]

Oh yes, and people who expect GP/friends/adult siblings to babysit and then become enraged if don't do everything exactly the same as the parent.

I get keeping babies/toddlers in their sleeping routine and providing info that will save the sanity of the babysitters - telling them that DC won't sleep without Smelly Bear. It's the posts that say My mother walks 10 miles in the rain every day to babysit my DC while I go to yoga but now she's started giving them apple juice when we've only ever allowed them orange. Should I confront her or just cut off all contact with her?

[AnyoneforTurps]

The sheer intensity of annoyance over trivia: cat poo rage, rude GP receptionists (a special shout-out to the poster who likened them to concentration camp guards), being called the wrong name/title or - shudder - Mum (as in "Are you Mum?").

I find these things annoying too, but - if they are the worse thing that happen to you - I want your life. IRL the normal response is to mutter under your breath but, if MN is believed, there are oodles of people who respond with formal complaints and/or massive hissy fits.

[AmberLeaf]

I was going to say something like that Compo.

Not having learned to drive when you live in a city is no biggy.

[ComposHat]

I am always shock when I hear a woman of my generation has never learned to drive.

I guess you live in a suburban/rural location. I live in a city and people who've lived there all their lives never bothered as everything was walking distance or accesable by public transport Of my social circle of about 15 people (late 20s to mid 30s) I am one of only three who can drive and the only one to own a car.

[AmberLeaf]

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurotypical

[boodles]

What is a NT child? I must have missed the memo.

[LaGuardia]

I am always when I hear a woman of my generation has never learned to drive.

[alexbaublistigers]

Why is it considered odd not being able to drive??

Plenty of people like me have perfectly valid medical reasons for not driving. It's not odd at all.

[AmberLeaf]

Re 'NT'

Be glad you are so unfamiliar with it.

[Whistleblower0]

I'd forgotten about calling children NT. Only ever heard this on mumsnet.

[friday16]

Suggesting that if someone cooks a stew for Christmas lunch and gets the portion sizes wrong, it may mean that they have mental health issues.

[peanutbutterandbanana]

Bohemian Girl - I'm round to yours then

[cloggal]

chocolate stain

The vehemence of the whole BF/FF debate - never encountered that in real life. I actually find it quite distasteful given that we live in a society where all babies (except for very unusual cases of neglect) are adequately fed. If some people have an excess of self-righteous fervour around the whole feeding thing perhaps they could direct it towards fundraising for the millions of babies around the world suffering from malnutrition? Just a thought.

Oh my goodness. THIS. I said almost exactly this to a friend only a couple of days ago. Ditto traditional weaning/blw, SAHM/WOHM, ad nauseum.

[HappyMummyOfOne]

Loving this thread, thing that always amaze me on MN are

Being scared of a toilet brush
Awful names for children
SAHMs having cleaners rather than just cleaning themselves or believing their husband should do it after work
Mooncups
How easily people are told to leave their husband for trivial things
Hatred of MILs
Outrage should a partner want a night out, hobby etc
The five million buggies for one child
Screen time
Food that dares not be orgnanic or has sugar in it
Calling children NT
SAHMs being told to bill their partner for childcare and housework despite it being just want parents and adults do

And recently Christmas. Am staggered at the number of threads where a child will only have one or two presents as anything else is spoiling them. Even worse, they have to pay half towards the present themselves! Not really a present then.

[OpalTourmaline]

OP: "I'm really struggling at the moment. My husband left me for his secretary, my baby has terrible colic and cries all day. He wakes every 45 minutes throughout the night. I have pnd and I'm just exhausted"

Reply: "Just enjoy your baby. They are this age for such a short time. Savour every moment while you have the chance."

[Chocolatestain]

The vehemence of the whole BF/FF debate - never encountered that in real life. I actually find it quite distasteful given that we live in a society where all babies (except for very unusual cases of neglect) are adequately fed. If some people have an excess of self-righteous fervour around the whole feeding thing perhaps they could direct it towards fundraising for the millions of babies around the world suffering from malnutrition? Just a thought.

Also the degree to which some people over analyse and micro manage their child's every move. I was brought up in the '70s. People didn't have parenting styles, they just had kids. And it was considered perfectly acceptable to leave your children in the car outside the pub with a bottle of pop and a packet of crisps (although we were allowed into the pub garden to drink shandy ).

I do use a mooncup though. Tampons always seem to leak on me. Must have a funny-shaped fanjo. Now there's a word I've ever come across on MN!

[Crowler]

Teaching toddlers to call their genitalia their penis/vagina. Or better yet, vulva..

Yes. Guilty of having an 11 year old who calls his "willy" a "pee-pee".

I work in a shop in London, hope I haven't outed myself there.

LOL.

[BohemianGirl]

And who, in RL, cooks a 4-course Christmas lunch?


Er me ? well if you count trifle, cheese and biscuits as 'cooking' but lunch here is just endless..... we break for an hour or two then go back for the next course!

[NoArmaniNoPunani]

Someone posts that their parent's will states that they are being left a fiver while their brother gets 600k.

Replies are 'stop being so grabby'
'My parents are dead, just enjoy your parents while they are alive'

[woollytights]

Teaching toddlers to call their genitalia their penis/vagina. Or better yet, vulva.

[EachAndEveryHighway]

This is a hilarious thread. Agree with a lot, only thing I can think to add is that I've never heard the expression 'suck it up' apart from on Mumsnet. And don't know anyone in real life with polished concrete hearths.

[BigChocolateOrange]

Compos that just made me snort. SO true!

[Shenanagins]

boyfromthebigbadcity only if some clever marketing person says that the goat tears will give me eternal youth, or something!